Worst movie lines...- Page 2

[Love4Cheno]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 5:38pm

I might have to rent it myself now.

Showgirls has a horrendous screenplay but somehow it's perfection.

[broadway86]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 5:41pm

"I had to see what all the buzz was about."

As did I. I worked at Blockbuster, so I decided to take it out for a night, though I felt ashamed doing so. My mouth was wide open throughout the running time. I was thoroughly confused.

I think that You Got Served has one of the worst screenplays I've ever come across.

"Back up off my piece, B."
"Quit playin', son."

WHAT?!?! The dancing was hot, though.

[ShbrtAlley44]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 5:55pm

"God has opened the sea with a blast from His nostrils!" - The Ten Commandments

"Oh, Moses, Moses, you silly, splendid, adorable fool!" - The Ten Commandments

[Plum]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 6:00pm

*blink* Please tell me those aren't real.
Updated On: 7/18/05 at 06:00 PM

[StickToPriest]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 6:06pm

"Besides, there's gotta be more to life than makin' out."
~~Michelle Pfeiffer, Grease 2

[Cruel_Sandwich]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 6:17pm

I haven't seen this (nor would I ever want to) but the trailer to Dukes of Hazzard should qualify:

"I think something bounced up into my undercarriage"

That doesn't even make sense as a double entendre. And when you fail at double entendres, what point is there to your existence?

[EvelynNesbit1906]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 7:44pm

"MUMBLER!" - Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (for execution)

"I don't know what to do. That bitch of a bearing wall is blocking my view."
"I'll tell you what to do................. TEAR DOWN that BITCH of a bearing wall and put a WINDOW where it OUGHT TO BE!" - Mommie Dearest

"Doing things ON YOUR OWN is BEST." - Mommie Dearest

"It'll be GRAAAAAND." - Mommie Dearest

"I'm sorry I did that. I'd have rather cut off my hand." - Mommie Dearest/Mildred Pierce

"And your room looks like some two dollar refurbished room on some backstreet hotel in Oklahoma!" - Mommie Dearest

"I'm gonna tell oh I am I AM GOING TO TELL." - Mommie Dearest

"I should've known you'd know where to find the boys AND the booze." - Mommie Dearest

"I can handle the socks." - Mommie Dearest

"Ma! All the sloppiness and DIRT." - Mommie Dearest

"You are bad, BAD spoiled children." - Mommie Dearest

"My babies. Someone stole BOTH my babies." - Mommie Dearest

"Why are you always lookin' at yourself in the mirror? WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT TELL ME!!!!" - Mommie Dearest

"Dammit Perino's is MY place!" - Mommie Dearest

"Only a kid. So was I. ONNNNLY a kid. I learned EARLY. Life goes by toooo damned fast. You've got to know how to COMPETE and WIN." - Mommie Dearest

"Darling is that the present you like best? Then THAT'S the present you can keep!" - Mommie Dearest

"Donnnn't youuuu JUDGE me!" - Mommie Dearest

"I'm going to make a perfect life for you Christina Darling." - Mommie Dearest

"When I told you to call me that, I wanted you to mean it!" - Mommie Dearest

"Donnnn't FVCK with me FELLAS! This ain't my first time at the rodeo." - Mommie Dearest

"Jesus Christ." - Mommie Dearest

[justme2]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 10:25pm

alright, just remembered a great one from a classic that's on TCM right now, Cat and the Canary.

Bob Hope, Paulette Goddard and some third actor are in a ship's cabin. They are discussing zombies in Cuba...

1st actor- "You see the zombies all the time, wandering around, no life in them, following orders, not knowing what they are doing..."

Bob Hope - "Oh, like a Democrat"


Ok, I am a die hard Democrat and laugh my ass off every time I hear Bob Hope utter that line. I even saw the movie at the Stanford theater in Palo Alto, CA....and we laughed long and loud at it.

[jasonf]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 10:31pm

I don't remember who said it, but I literally groaned out loud in the Man From the Iron Mask at this, (imagine it said with a THICK, BAD French accent):

"To love you would be to betray France, not to love you would be to betray my heart."

[CostumeMistress]

Posted: 7/18/05 at 10:35pm

When I went with my aunt to see the movie Gattaca, we about wet our pants at Halle Barry's line:

"I don't believe in ghosts, [meaningful pause], but they believe in me."

And, I too want to see Gigli just to see how awful it truly is. If any of you want to see a movie that really is so bad it's fall-off-the-couch-laughing funny, get a copy of "The Lady and the Highwayman," with Hugh Grant. Sooooo bad. Sooooo fun.

[MTVMANN]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 2:34am

xxnewgirlxx, you got it! It was Mikey from the Goonies!

EvelynNesbit1906, you must not be a big fan of Mommie Dearest! Damn, those wire hangers!

[EvelynNesbit1906]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 2:56am

"EvelynNesbit1906, you must not be a big fan of Mommie Dearest! Damn, those wire hangers!"

A big fan of Mommie Dearest is exactly what I am...

[Forester]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 3:13am

"I am going to make you as happy as a baby Psychlo on a straight diet of kerbango."
-Battlefield: Earth

Ecks: Where did you get all this ordinance?
Sever: Some women collect shoes.
-Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 3:36am

Boobies, boobies, boobies. Nothin' but boobies! Who needs em? I do fine without 'em - - - Patty Duke as "Neely O'Hara" in "Valley of the Dolls" [1967]

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 3:39am

"I want it, I need it, I love it when a beautiful woman licks between my toes." - - - David Gurian as "Harris Allsworth" in "Beyond the Valley of the Dolls" [1970]

[Forester]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 3:59am

"My two-thousand dollar watch is a fake, and so am I."
-Phone Booth

[EvelynNesbit1906]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 5:22am

And I understand that Valley of the Dolls, like Mommie Dearest, is especially funny because it was meant to be a serious film.

[HeartinNYC]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 10:35am

My all-time favorite, from "Plan 9 From Outer Space":

"Inspector Clay is dead! Murdered! And one thing's for sure: someone's responsible!"

[broadway86]

Posted: 7/19/05 at 4:24pm

CostumeMistress-

I think you meant Gothika.