murdered woman's dad races to NYC to appear on TODAY

[Auggie27]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 3:40pm

I cannot wrap my mind around the new normal in public behavior around the most tragic events. The way victims of violent crimes consciously or unconsciously turn up in the spotlight, ready, willing and able to to speak to everyone. Before a body is found, there is a strong need to seek assistance, gain info. But afterwards? Where's the dignity of seclusion and privacy? Does everyone feel it's critical to explain everything, to go on record immediately?

It was startling this a.m. to turn on TODAY and see three family members in NYC being cozily interviewed on the couch by Natalie Morales. A nine month's pregnant woman's body was found late Saturday afternoon. And her father and two other family members jumped on a plane, flew to NYC, checked into a nice hotel, to appear on TV first thing this morning? Huh? Why?

How could any parent of a murdered child think that 48 hours after the fact ... the best place to be is Rockefeller Center, NYC? Talking about the grandchild as "all boy," and making other comments.

It's disturbing to contemplate the to me unseemly negotiations in the first hours after the body was found, picturing how NBC contacted and wooed Jessie's father, and made arrangements for his appearance. Why would this man's first reaction be "I've gotta go to NY and talk on the TODAY show"

As I type this ... in front of the circus of reporters outside the court, the woman's mother is giving a press conference, touting the police, articulate, full of measured statements, composed. "I cheered" she said, when Cutts bail was announced. I know they are in agony, but I cannot understand this sense of obligatory public revelation at a time of extreme pain. How did this behavior become the standard?

Updated On: 6/25/07 at 03:40 PM

[Unknown User]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 3:47pm

It's horrible Auggie. I think people do not know how to grieve privately. They see so many people paraded in tears before the TV cameras that they do not know how to behave otherwise. Somehow there seems to be a belief that you need to "memorialize" them publicly and that the biggest audience is the better. I feel for these people who fall into the trap and end up on the TV sharing their grief with the world.

[DottieD'Luscia]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 3:47pm

I whole-heartedly agree and find myself changing the channel when such interviews take place.

[RockabyeHamlet]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:04pm

I agree. What's more disgusting is when family members make money off the death of their child, spouse, etc. I'm sorry, but I can't take anyone seriously who asks for $10,000 for a t.v. or conference appearence to publicly grieve. I feel terrible when a tragedy like this occurs, but not when a relative drives around in a brand new Porshe because of it.

[brdlwyr]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:07pm

I found it disturbing especially in light of the fact that he was estranged from his daughter. Creepy!

[papalovesmambo]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:20pm

i haven't been able to watch any coverage of this after seeing a cnn report while i was on the treadmill last week, before they found the body. i only glanced up at the tv (usually i'm staring at the wall singing along to the ipod) and the "canton, oh" caught my eye. i stared long enough to see the 2 year-old's words shown about 5 or 6 times on the screen and i almost puked. who the f*ck thought it would be a good idea to parade the kid's words on tv? ugh. i find the whole thing and all the parties involved including the media to be reprehensible.

Updated On: 6/25/07 at 04:20 PM

[MotorTink]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:21pm

Everyone is looking for their 15 seconds of fame no matter the cost.

[gymdudeva]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:23pm

I agree. What is wrong with people? I think it is a broader problem of NOTHING being private and sacred any more.

[MotorTink]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:27pm

a different note, but same point - Just look at these morning shows. How many people line up and stand there forever, just to be on live TV waving in the background? Or when something happens in your home town and a TV crew shows up. All of a sudden everyone in that neighborhood was that person's best friend and has something to add.

But I blame the shows just as much as the people - because the news shows thrive on it. They seek out the people most of the time.

It just reminds you that nothing is scared and everything pretty much has a price.

[Auggie27]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:41pm

I didn't know the father was estranged. That perhaps make him even more exploitative. This family clearly operates with a high level of dysfunction. Watching the mother explain her arraignment strategy moments after she executed it creeped me out. Her daughter's barely dead, and she's able to articulate her revenge MO vis a vis looking in the killer's eyes, on national television?

Her attny appears, pimp or agent-like (redundant), to say "she'll take your questions..." And then someone on MSNBC announces that many mothers wouldn't be as "strong" as this one, to do what she did--and tell us about it. Somehow, that was the last straw.

I suppose, to create this thread is to buy into the madness. But what are we to make of this?

[DottieD'Luscia]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:44pm

Then I suggest not even tuning into Nancy Grace tonight, because I'm sure they'll all be on her show as well!

[MotorTink]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 4:45pm

**vomit**

[jimnysf]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 5:12pm

It's disgusting. Mark Klass and the "America's Most Wanter" guy have turned their situations into full time paying careers!

I also can't stand it when they show random people standing around putting teddy bears and flowers on the street, in front of a house, etc. Why don't they send the flowers and teddy bears to the living. Most of these idiots never knew the dead person but they have a need to go there and get themselves noticed.

[Rose_MacShane]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 5:27pm

Yeah, I can't quite put my finger on it, but there's something about Marc Klaas that rubs me the wrong way.

[Anakela]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 5:52pm

possibly slightly morbid question time:
So am I the only one who has arrangements with friends that, if I ever turn up missing, they're to lie and claim that I'm pregnant? I know pregnant white woman is the holy trifecta of missing person news story, (for adults, as opposed to pretty white girl for missing children), and since I'm not white I want to at least get as splashed all across the news as being a woman and 'pregnant' will get me...

Or maybe these are the kinds of conversations that only my friends and I have.

[best12bars]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 5:57pm

Auggie27--Great post.

And I couldn't agree with you more.

[Elphaba]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 5:58pm

In situations like these, I do not feel I have any right to judge someone.
I am not in their situation, and I have no idea how I would react in such circumstances.
Everyone acts differently when horrible things happen, and everyone grieves in their own way.

Updated On: 6/25/07 at 05:58 PM

[jimnysf]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 6:02pm

Sorry, Anakela. If you are not a white missing woman, the press will not cover the story. I think it's out of control when a 3 cable networks provide all day coverage on this person. It's sad that she has been murdered, but there are other stories more important to our lives and they are being pushed aside for this coverage. And, oh, by the way, more soldiers were killed today in Iraq. Now back to our coverage of Natalie Holloway or whoever the latest missing white woman is.

[best12bars]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 6:19pm

I think we're being conditioned now in this country that whenever a tragedy strikes us, we should pick up the phone and contact the media for some kind of gratifying attention or compensation. There are so many shows running now that support this idea! Not just the news.

I'm home today and channel-surfed past Saint Oprah. She's got one today! A woman who found out that she was pregnant while her husband was dying of cancer. So now, she's on Saint Oprah, getting a free living room makeover, while she shows us a trunk of his private belongings. Earlier she was crying into a Kleenex about how much she misses him.

Not enough to grieve in private though, right? But certainly enough to contact Oprah's show for a new couch and coffee table. THAT's how much she loves him.

She's entitled, right? Her husband died of cancer... so she should have a new sofa paid for... on national TV. That'll make her feel better. That'll make us all feel better that Saint Oprah granted her wish. She's been uplifted, celebrated and rewarded for her grief.

I don't understand it at all.

[Auggie27]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 6:21pm

Yes, Elphaba, "Everyone grieves in their own way..." True enough, but call me quirky, and indeed jugemental -- guilty as charged -- flying to NYC to appear on the TODAY show in less that 48 hours? All expenses paid? Pehaps he found comfort in Natalie Morales's invasive and borderline lurid line of questioning. Who knows, maybe it's the first step in his healing process -- before his daughter has even been buried.

But the bigger issue is the culture that now expects the appearance. No longer is a an on-site interview with a stand-up reporter sufficient -- we have to fly them to the East coast and put them on the couch within hours. Before a FUNERAL! BEFORE SHE'S EVEN HAD A COMPLETED AUTOPSY! "Everyone grieves in their own way," and obviously everyone watches that grief, eyes never averted to afford privacy, every chance they get.

Updated On: 6/25/07 at 06:21 PM

[jimnysf]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 6:25pm

Now if he had gone on Oprah, he could have gotten a new couch for his home and then done a live remote

I wonder if he is staying in the city tonight and if so, what show is he seeing? He seems shameless enough so he might as well make the most of the trip.

[best12bars]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 6:39pm

You should see "Nothing Sacred" (later musicalized as Hazel Flagg).

It's the story of a small town woman (Carole Lombard) who finds out she is terminally ill, when the local doctor misreads a medical chart. A big city reporter is there visiting (Fredric March) and decides to take Hazel to New York for an all-expenses paid trip, while reporting daily on her deteriorating health. Hazel doesn't know she isn't dying though, and she gets all caught up in her new-found celebrity. She is wined, dined... she is given the key to the city... she has a fan club... she is on the front page every day.

So when she finds out she isn't really dying, she keeps it a secret at first. She can't give it all up.

This story could be taken from today's headlines, but it's a 1930s screwball comedy classic.

Except in reality... I'm not laughing at what's happening today on the news. Maybe I should be. But I don't see the humor in exploiting death or human tragedy for the keys to the city... or for the sake of a new sofa, even if it's the one found on the set of the Today Show.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 7:25pm

a little off-topic, but not really, it fits right in as an indictment of this culture....
CNN Dumps Michael Moore For Paris Hilton

[MotorTink]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 7:26pm

the whole war over who got her first interview after prison is insane.

[SNAFU]

Posted: 6/25/07 at 8:29pm

To be fair, when you lose someone in an unforseen, out of the ordinary way, the world tends to take on a surreal quality (hell it is that way when you lose someone after a long illness!). You become numb. I am sure that these people haven't even begun grieving yet. I am sure they are accepting these speaking gigs without really thinking about it. They were thrown into a media spotlight and I assume find the media attention as some sort of relief from the pain and sorrow.
I am also sure that they didn't contact the TODAY SHOW but the TODAY SHOW contacted them in order to get the RATINGS. I find it more despicable the Media's hounding these people so they can get the viewers.