Altar Boyz ---Tour---San Francisco Reviews

[jimnysf]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 12:29pm

From the SF Chronicle...



Gospel according to 'Boyz' is deceptively soul-stirring



Jesse JP Johnson, from left, Ryan Strand, Ryan Ratliff, Matthew Buckner and Jay Garcia engage in soul-searching and dance moves in "Altar Boyz."


Matthew Buckner as Matthew, center, plays the leader of the boy band in the off-Broadway hit now at the Orpheum.

Altar Boyz: Musical. Music and lyrics by Gary Adler and Michael Patrick Walker. Book by Kevin Del Aguila. (Through April 8. Orpheum Theatre, 1192 Market St., San Francisco. Tickets: $25-$80. Call [phone] or go to www.shnsf.com.)



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And God -- well, the voice of Shadoe Stevens, actually -- said, "Thou shalt anoint thy hair with product," and that's how the boy band "Altar Boyz" was formed.
At first, it doesn't seem like there's all that much going on in the show beyond its snappy lyrics and catchy songs, but before its 90 minutes are up, the touring version of the 2-year-old off-Broadway musical revue, which opened Wednesday at the Orpheum, makes a believer out of any agnostic.

The premise of "Altar Boyz," with a book by Kevin Del Aguila and music and lyrics by Gary Adler and Michael Patrick Walker, is that the five-member vocal group has rolled into town for the finale of its national Raise the Praise tour, which is as much a soul-targeting revival meeting as it is a bubblegum pop concert. Actually, the ensemble isn't entirely Christian. Certainly four of the guys are -- Matthew, Mark, Luke and Juan (get it?) -- but the fifth is a Jewish guy named Abraham (Ryan Strand), who won a spot in the group because he could write lyrics.

What starts out as a frighteningly accurate imitation of a real boy-band concert evolves into something more. Oh wait, as Matthew chastises, "don't say 'evolve' " -- that's the ultimate E-word for evangelicals. As we get the back stories of the five guys, "Altar Boyz" becomes a gentle send-up -- not of Catholicism per se, or even of Christianity, but, rather, of what might be termed too-convenient, insincerely ardent beliefs. And that's where the show's deeper context comes into play.

Matthew (Matthew Buckner) is the leader of the group, the pretty boy with the angelic voice who, if he didn't believe so much in sexual abstinence before marriage, might find himself dating Britney Spears in her pre-Federline days. Because all boy bands either have to have a gay guy or someone audiences think might be gay, there is Mark (Ryan J. Ratliff), the gay or questioning one, who only flirts with his true identity when he's not flirting with his secret love, Matthew.

Dim-bulb Luke (Jesse JP Johnson) spent some time in a facility for "exhaustion" and did some things in the past that he doesn't exactly remember because, he says emphatically, he was "exhausted." Juan (Jay Garcia) was left as an infant on a Tijuana doorstep and raised by nuns who gave him his Spanish accent. He longs to find his real parents. And, in the song "Everybody Fits," about being an outsider, yarmulke-wearing Abe celebrates his inclusion among the uber-gentiles.

There's nothing in "Altar Boyz" that would offend the faithful, but the genius of the show is that it walks not just one thin line, but several, and all at the same time. Is it mocking religion? Not really. But it does suggest that blind, unexamined beliefs can't really exercise any lasting impact on our lives. And although it offers a consistently funny satire of artistically vacuous boy bands, it does so with enough real affection that hordes of teenage girls, calling themselves "Altarholics," have become squealing fans of the guys who only play harmonizing airheads onstage.

The humor is often broad, but deceptively so. Between the songs' punch lines, the lyrics crackle with wit and invention, and a whole pew-ful of double entendre. "Put it in me, put it in me," the guys plead in the chorus of the song "Rhythm in Me." And when Mark teases us about coming out, only to celebrate his Catholicism instead, he evokes Jerry Herman's gay anthem "I Am What I Am" from "La Cage Aux Folles" with the proudly defiant line, "I am a Catholic: It's not a choice."

The best performances are by Jay Garcia, a sizzler who all but stops the show as Juan with "La Vida Eternal," Johnson, a gifted clown, as B-boy wannabe Luke, and Ratliff as "Altar Boyz's" gay apostle. As Matthew and Abe, Buckner and Strand acquit themselves well enough, but, to be fair, their characters don't have the dimension of their other three bandmates.

Under Stafford Arima's crisp direction, the five charmers work like a well-anointed machine, singing in lush harmony. The choreography, by Christopher Gattelli, is a step-perfect re-creation of boy-band moves familiar to anyone who's seen them executed by the Four Tops to more contemporary practitioners such as the Backstreet Boys. Again, the five performers here are perfectly -- wait for it -- in sync.





SF Chronicle

[jimnysf]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 12:35pm

From the Mercury News...

`Altar' needs bigger offering
GAGS CAN'T QUITE CARRY CHRISTIAN BOY BAND SPOOF
By Karen D'Souza
Mercury News
San Jose Mercury News
Article Launched:03/16/2007 01:39:49 AM PDT


Peace out, sayeth the lord.

This here is the gospel according to "Altar Boyz." Jesus may be calling on your cell phone, but fear not, no roaming charges will be incurred. And lo, he shall bid thee to gird thy loins in pleather. Yo, verily.

This Christian boy band spoof, that begat legions of devotees (altarholics, natch) who be getting down coast to coast, is preaching the word through April 8 at San Francisco's Orpheum Theatre. A mindlessly cheesy pop music pastiche, this off-Broadway hit strikes pretty-boy poses and pokes mild-mannered fun at cashing in on Christ.

But ultimately the musical feels like a MadTV skit stretched out over 90 minutes. As parodies go, it lacks the outrageous snarkiness of South Park (see: the Christian Rock Hard episode). Heck, at points it makes "American Idol" look deep. By the last act, you'll be thanking the Lord it's over.

Lest I be struck down as a blasphemer, let me explain. There are moments of kitsch redemption to be found in Marc Kessler and Ken Davenport's hip-hop homily. For one, the apostolic posse is made up of Matthew, the hottie (Matthew Buckner); Mark, the one in the closet (Ryan J. Ratliff); Luke, the one on the wagon (Jesse JP Johnson); and Juan, the Latino one (Jay Garcia).

Oh, yeah, and there's Abraham (Ryan Strand). He's the Jewish one. When the other guys express doubt that Jewish people even are allowed in their church, Abraham pipes up that they must be, because he spotted one hanging above the altar.

Cheeky little puns goose the show along at first. Luke advises boys to keep their hands off girls, no matter how Mary Magdelicious they are. Matthew plucks out a woman from the audience and croons: "Something about you, baby/girl you make me want to wait." And the shout-outs to Sony are a hoot!

And I'm definitely not hatin' (a word the boyz like to rhyme with "Satan") the choreography. Christopher Gattelli's super-fly moves have the snap and pop of a Backstreet Boys concert. Ah, nostalgia.

But many of the running jokes never quite pop, including Mark's obvious longing for Matthew (although Ratliff is heavenly singing his "I am Catholic, hear me roar" anthem). There's also a mean-spirited sideplot about the death of one of the boys' parents that seems callously mined for shtick. And the whole lamb puppet-show (as in Lamb of God, get it?) makes atheism look better and better.

Certainly, the Soul Sensor DX-12, God's got-to-have gadget, took an eternity counting down from 1,159 (the number of souls in the audience in desperate need of salvation) to zero. By the time the soul ticker hit 33, this reviewer was indeed seeing the light ... of the exit sign shining in the darkness like a beacon. No rest for the wicked, I'm afraid.



`Altar Boyz'Conceived by Marc Kessler

and Ken Davenport,

book by Kevin Del Aguila,

music and lyrics by Gary Adler

and Michael Patrick Walker

The upshot Give it up for the Almighty! The success thus far of this one-joke Christian boy band lampoon truly has been miraculous.

Where Orpheum Theatre, 1192 Market St., San Francisco

When 8 p.m. Tuesdays through Saturdays; 2 p.m. Wednesdays, Saturdays and Sundays

Through April 8

Running time 90 minutes (no intermission)

Tickets $25-$80; [phone], www.shnsf.com

[jimnysf]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 12:42pm

From the Oakland Tribune...

THEATER REVIEW
Lightly satirical 'Altar Boyz' keeps the comic faith
Three stars — In praise of peppy pop







THEATER REVIEW
Lightly satirical 'Altar Boyz' keeps the comic faith
Three stars — In praise of peppy pop
By Chad Jones, STAFF WRITER
Inside Bay Area
Article Last Updated:03/15/2007 10:49:06 AM PDT

And God said, "Anoint thy hair with product." And so they did.
Five boys from Ohio — four Christians and one Jewish lad — who call themselves the Altar Boyz hit the road with an act full of faith-based pop and a mission to, in their words, "praise the Lord with funk and rhyme."

Oh, yes, and comedy. That's the thing that separates the Altar Boyz from other boy bands — Christian or otherwise.

In the real world, the Altar Boyz might be taken seriously (and indeed, they do inspire slavish devotion from fans called Altarholics). But this band only exists in the very unreal world of musical theater.

"Altar Boyz" is the little off-Broadway musical that could. The show, conceived by Marc Kessler and Ken Davenport, with a book by Kevin Del Aguila and a score by Gary Adler and Michael Patrick Walker, just celebrated its second anniversary in New York. And on Wednesday, the national tour opened its N'SYNC-ish revival meeting at San Francisco's Orpheum Theatre.

The premise is straightforward enough: the Christian boy band Altar Boyz has reached the final night of its Raise the Praise tour. With the help of a gizmo called the Soul Sensor DX-12, they're going count how many troubled, unsaved souls are in the audience. Through the magic of God and their funky fresh music, they're going to bring that number (1,159 on opening night) down to zero.

The first two songs, "We Are the Altar Boyz" and "Rhythm in Me," pretty much set the tone for the entire show with their amusing lyrics and hilariously accurate, Timberlakian choreography (by Christopher Gattelli).

"Now we don't believe in hurtin' or hatin' 'cause that's the kind of stuff that leads to Satan," the boys sing with utter earnestness.

Director Stafford Arima wisely plays it straight so the comedy never seems mean or blasphemous. But there is some bite to this pleasantly mushy pop.

In "The Calling," the boys sing, "Jesus called me on my cell phone. No roaming charges were incurred."

The blend of show biz and religion is an intentional blur, and that uncomfortable (but familiar) marriage gives the show much of its forward momentum (with apologies to the ridiculous Soul Sensor).

So how do you make a cheesy-sincere boy band interesting for 90 minutes once you've seen all their attempts to incorporate crucifixion imagery into their dance moves?

While Adler and Walker's songs (they trade off songwriting duties rather than collaborate on each tune) are the most interesting part of the show, Del Aguila's book provides a few meaty morsels of plot and character.

Matthew (Matthew Buckner) is the dreamboat leader of the gang. He's also the secret desire of Mark (Ryan J. Ratliff), the most fabulous member of the group (and the one the Rev. Ted Haggard, in a previous life, might relate most to).

Luke (Jesse JP Johnson) is the group's hip-hopper. He's done time in rehab for "exhaustion," and his big number, "Body, Mind & Soul," offers some phat crunking for the Lord.

Juan (Jay Garcia) is a Mexican orphan with a Spanish accent who's about to discover the truth about his birth parents.

And Abraham (Ryan Strand, wearing a T-shirt that says, "Everybody Loves a Jewish Boy"), is the lyricist who joined the band by divine accident.

Fro the sake of variety, this "concert" offers up a salsa number ("La Vida Eternal"), an exorcism ("Number 918"), a coming out (as a Catholic) anthem ("Epiphany"), an ode to abstinence ("Something About You") and, though we don't actually see the Lamb of God, we do get five Lambchop hand puppets during "Everybody Fits."

The winning Boyz quintet handles the ultra-pop demands of the score more than ably, with Ratliff's "Epiphany," which blissfully quotes "I Am Woman" and "Dreamgirls," taking best of show honors for its boffo combo of passion and humor.

By the final inspirational number, "I Believe," the boys aren't even singing about Jesus anymore. They're singing to each other. So as much as "Altar Boyz" wants to be about faith and hypocrisy, it ends up being about fellowship and sweet, sweet boy band harmonies.





Oakland Tribune

[Taryn]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 4:18pm

I was lucky enough to get comp tickets to this show because my good friend that I'm staying with for spring break worked with the ASM last summer. I absolutely fell in love! It's a hilarious show with a lot of heart. Getting to hang out at the stage management office before the show was pretty fun, too.

Plus, after being introduced to the cast members, Matthew Buckner offered a cast escort for my friend and I back to our car, as the theatre really isn't in the greatest part of town. My friend turned it down, but it was awfully sweet. They're a really adorable group.

[jimnysf]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 4:35pm

San Francisco Examiner...Altar Boyz ***½




Review: ‘Altar Boyz’ a slice of pop heaven

Leslie Katz, The Examiner


SAN FRANCISCO - There’s nothing not to like about “Altar Boyz.” They have a much better sense of humor than their real-life counterparts (’NSync or the Backstreet Boys) and sing just as harmoniously. They’re just as cute, too.


The five characters — Matthew, Mark, Luke, Juan and Abraham — comprise the cast of the hit off-Broadway musical onstage at San Francisco’s Orpheum Theatre. The revue, in a fashion similar to that of “Forever Plaid,” sweetly spoofs boy bands, with lots of laughs that go down easy and a huge heart. That the guys happen to be Christian adds to the fun, but theatergoers needn’t be religious to get the jokes.

The real stars of the show are the pitch-perfect songs by Gary Adler (who led the smokin’ band on Wednesday’s opening night) and Michael Patrick Walker. In these days where musicals are packed with instantly forgettable tunes, “Altar Boyz” stands out with its roster of radio-ready pop gems that certainly are funnier than (and actually improve upon) those sung by actual boy bands. (Sample lyric: “Jesus called me on my cell phone.”)

The tight harmonies and bouncy choreography never let up, from the opening “We Are the Altar Boyz” to the closer “I Believe,” with styles nicely veering from disco to Latin to hip-hop to gospel to rock and soaring Mariah Carey-worthy ballads.

The journey (clever book by Kevin Del Aguila) involves the band members closing their tour with a special San Francisco show during which they work to save the souls of everybody in the audience. And they can, thanks to the Sony “soul sensor,” an electronic device that counts the sinners in the theater. At the outset, the number reads 1159, but by the end of a brisk 90 minutes, they’re down to a single-digit number, and, of course, everyone feels better having shared giggles, secrets, a few fears and love.

Matthew Buckner as Matthew, Ryan J. Ratliff as Mark, Jesse JP Johnson as Luke, Jay Garcia as Juan and Ryan Strand as Abraham are delightfully energetic in their roles, personifying their characters with just the right light-yet-real touch. In a post-modern era where cynicism and irony rule, “Altar Boyz” miraculously manage to be kind without being sappy, and clever without being mean.


Altar Boyz ***½

Where: Orpheum Theatre, 1192 Market St., San Francisco

When: 8 p.m. Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays; 2 and 8 p.m. Wednesdays and Saturdays; 2 p.m. Sundays; closes April 8

Tickets: $25 to $80

Contact: [phone] or www.ticketmaster.com


SF Examiner

"I've lost everything! Luis, Marty, my baby with Chris, Chris himself, James. All I ever wanted was love." --Sheridan Crane "Passions" ------- "Housework is like bad sex. Every time I do it, I swear I'll never do it again til the next time company comes."--"Lulu" from "Can't Stop The Music" ----- "When the right doors didn't open for him, he went through the wrong ones" - "Sweet Bird of Youth" ------------ --------- "Passions" is uncancelled! See NBC.com for more info.

[Rachel2789]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 5:36pm

When did Nick Blaemire (Abe) leave the tour?

[CATSNYrevival]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 6:05pm

I believe opening night in San Diego was his last show, but I'm not 100% sure. Updated On: 3/16/07 at 06:05 PM

[TLKfan]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 11:23pm

Jimmnysf, Maybe it's just me but whenever I read the SJ Mercury review they are never that positive.

I saw the show in SD and it was awesome, I was doubtful at first because I had seen the original cast, but they were just as good.

[tourboi]

Posted: 3/16/07 at 11:50pm

Yes, Nick left the tour in San Diego.

[shesamarshmallow]

Posted: 3/17/07 at 2:11am

Which is fine with me, cause I have a huge crush on Ryan Strand.
(No offense, Nick!)

[TLKfan]

Posted: 3/17/07 at 2:55pm

Ryan was sooo good! I am so glad I saw him, and I can't wait to see him and the rest of the cast again next week.

[Jane2]

Posted: 3/17/07 at 4:05pm

I'm so glad the reviews were mostly great. I don't see how anyone can not like this show, but each to his own.

[jochang621]

Posted: 3/26/07 at 12:44pm

i went on saturday night - I had seen it twice in NY and wasn't SO excited about seeing it again, but went with some friends who wanted to see it...

and wow! was I wrong. ^^ I had forgotten how funny the show really is, and was seriously laughing the entire 90 minutes. I'm afraid I laughed too hard - sitting in the front row, they probably heard me! And my friends kept on laughing when it was silent as well b/c they were thinking about the jokes that were just delivered, so I'm sure the performers heard that as well. It's really fun to see it so close to the front, watching all the facial expressions really made it more funny. ("world... world... world...")

Go see it! It's such a fun show and the cast is excellent. A bad cast can definitely ruin this show, but the touring cast delivers.

It was interesting how at the end of the show, the cast made an announcement for people to bring their friends. i know the show's not doing selling out, but this is the first time i'd ever seen an announcement like this ever given.

[antonijan]

Posted: 3/26/07 at 7:02pm

from www.ebar.com

http://www.ebar.com/arts/art_article.php?sec=theatre&article=239

If they wrote a musical about a castrati boy band, would it be called Altered Boyz? A one-joke affair, certainly, which is what Altar Boyz can sometimes feel like.

The musical about a ditzy Catholic boy band opened in New York with little fanfare two years ago and became a surprise hit. Still running at its small off-Broadway home, Altar Boyz is now playing far larger houses on a national tour that has brought it to the Orpheum Theatre. But this five-man show does not easily fill the space, and it's easy to imagine its flaws might seem less problematic in a more intimate situation.

The first few songs set the tone with their purposefully clumsy/sincere lyrics and boy-band pastiche musical sounds. While bright spots do periodically appear, there isn't enough variety or invention to sustain the show for even its intermissionless 90 minutes.

There is good news in the abundant energy of the young performers, as they perform the hyper-kinetic choreography by Christopher Gattelli that parodies its sources with just the right amount of exaggeration. It would be inhuman to expect the cast to sustain that level of energy, and they are not required to do so.

But it is less fun for the audience when they are not in synchronized steps, as the music by Gary Adler and Michael Patrick Walker can fall into its genre's mediocrity. Adler and Walker do better at getting the joke across through their lyrics, which especially connect when coupling a spiritual purpose with a highly mundane reference.

The setup for the show is that we are watching the Altar Boyz on the final night of their Raise the Praise concert tour. Through several flashbacks, we see how the group came to be. During the concert itself, matters of loyalty arise, as revealed by a souls-saved tote-board that is supposedly monitoring the audience but also includes those on stage.

There is another ongoing drama. Band member Mark (Ryan J. Ratliff), who is clearly light in his Nikes, is infatuated with lead singer Matthew (Matthew Buckner). But it's a love that dare not sing its name, even though it seems Mark is about to in his anthem-like song "Epiphany." Mark is totally a gay cliche, but his condition nevertheless drew the biggest laughs in the show. With Juan (Jay Garcia), the show also has a Hispanic stereotype, and the character has an extended joke playing on the word "ass" from the 10 Commandments.

The group also includes the Jewish Abraham (Ryan Strand), who found his way into the band because he could write lyrics. And then there is the thuggish Luke (Jesse JP Johnson), who spent time in rehab for what he calls "exhaustion."

Director Stafford Arima tries to provide variety in the concert format, but there is the feel of a director flaying when the band members bring out a quintet of Lamb Chop sock puppets. Altar Boyz is eager to please, and even though the spirit is willing, that's not necessarily enough to move the flesh.