#1
Posted: 7/21/05 at 2:13am
So, I saw The Great Mme. Somers this evening. The critics pretty much got it right. Why would ANYBODY (other than her wealthy husband) see this show in Vegas and be willing to put millions into it to bring it to Broadway?
OK, first, the good. She looks fabulous ........ even with the camel toe. She is a very likeable, charismatic presense and holds the stage well (though the two giant video monitors certainly help). She can act somewhat and I've heard much worse singing before (though she goes flat whenever she attempts to sustain a note). And, I imagine that her story must inspire some people out there -- a handful of her fan club were in attendance tonight and there were shouts of "You go girl!!" periodically throughout.
When the screens projected the cover of her big confessional autobiography about her dysfunctional past, there was certainly a firm smattering of applause from dozens in the theatre and those same dozens whooped it up when the subsequent Phil Donahue Show promotional appearance for the book was shown. Mind you, most of the rest of the audience sat through this 100 minute self-indulgent presentation in what seemed to be stunned non-applauding silence throughout -- I cannot recall ever seeing so many people getting up from their seats during a show to go to the bathroom or leave the theatre entirely (well over two dozen by my count)
I really don't know how to describe this "show." Imagine a very vapid New Age-y "Long Day's Journey Into Night" starring The Osmonds. Imagine a very special episode of Dr. Phil set to music. Imagine an Al-Anon Meeting in which the person telling their story re-enacts their entire, often pitiful story with a million dollar multimedia presentation -- and a band. Imagine a former sitcom star turned self-help guru, cookbook and diet book author and Home Shopping Network Queen telling you the story of her life in excruciating detail and then lecturing you on how you can be a better person too if you too follow her path. Oh wait. You don't have to imagine the last part -- she still has a few shows left through Saturday.
The "show" is an informercial with musical interludes -- almost none of which make any sense. She describes her Anne Frank-esque childhood memories of hiding in a locked closet from her alcoholic abusive father. The scene is set to her child-like singing of "If I Only Had A Brain" with interjections of slamming doors and the sounds of a demonic-sounding father (reminiscent of the Sith from the Star Wars movies) screaming drunkenly and incoherently throughout. I suppose this was meant to convey the childhood terror she experienced. As staged, seeing a nearly 60 year old woman cowering behind a trunk pretending to be 5 and singing the Scarecrow's theme song was simply odd (and received gales of laughter from my section of the audience).
Later, she gets cast in a high school production of Guys and Dolls as Adelaide. She then gets knocked up shortly afterwards and again the demonic voices of her father criticizing her for being irresponsible and a "loser" fill the stage. So, for musical enhancement, Somers uses snippets of "Take Back Your Mink" to ......... um..........I don't know....... comment on her predicament at that moment? Huh? Maybe this all makes sense in Vegas after a few cocktails, but, here in New York, sober, I was confused.
"Pick Yourself Off, Dust Yourself Off" is employed to underscore the pre-fame period of her life where she was a single mother, getting evicted left and right, bouncing checks (later going to jail for it) and using shopping as a "cheer yourself up" salve. It doesn't quite fit.
There are also incessant refrains of "If You Knew Suzy, Like I Know Suzy" throughout in varying tempos (including a winsome, bathetic torch song rendition in the show's latter half -- may I NEVER hear ANY version of that song again in my lifetime) , a big dramatic version of "50 Percent" (from Ballroom -- the one well-placed number in the show, though Somers lacks the chops to deliver it.... the memory of Dorothy Loudon's original is untouched) and a few original tunes which are good enough, I suppose, but the "book" of this "show" robs them of any real impact. Also, the tinny, plastic synthesized arrangements are simply terrible.
Look, Somers is probably a lovely woman whom I don't wish to toss brickbats at and dismiss. She has been clearly through a lot (though while she mentions her firing, she doesn't really discuss her Three's Company days which were the highlight of her entire career -- Ritter and Dewitt don't merit a single mention in the entire show... she should have dished some dirt) and I'm quite gratified that despite many life setbacks, she has not only survived but flourished, becoming a multimillionaire and now wants to help others find their way through life's difficult obstacles. There's nothing wrong with having that desire and hey, good for her for taking the time and effort to share what she sees as her life lessons -- I certainly don't doubt that there are some people out there who want and need to hear that message.
"The Blonde in the Thunderbird," however, to me, came off as a narcissistic, embarassing exercise in hubris and vanity. It's certainly not the worst show I've ever seen -- perhaps, not even the worst show I've seen in the last year -- but it may be the most (perhaps unintended) exhibition of untamed egotism I've witnessed in MANY a season.
While I think that her message is well-intentioned and genuine (though her coda of "Well, I beat cancer, so you can too" is more than a little naive and ethically insensitive and wrongheaded) at the end of the day -- which is about how long this 100 minute show feels at times -- it's still not a "show" that deserves to be on Broadway and doesn't, in my book, qualify as even being what I would describe as a form of "entertainment." We live in an era when this almost exact story is told every single day of the week on Oprah, Dr. Phil, Montel, etc...... we've heard it all before and providing a musical accompaniment to it and putting it on a Broadway stage, does not make it "art" or even, frankly, "interesting."
She could have done the whole thing much cheaper for her therapist or a group encounter meeting, or simply made it a special event on the Home Shopping Network. Mind you, were this "show" to pop up on television as a true (if somewhat elaborate) infomercial at 2am, I'd have changed the channel....... quickly.
Some personal stories are worth telling on the Broadway stage -- Primo Levi, Charlotte von Mahlsdorff, Golda Meir......... and for showbiz folks, Elaine Stritch, Bea Arthur, Billy Crystal, Lena Horne come to mind. This, however, isn't one of them.
OK, first, the good. She looks fabulous ........ even with the camel toe. She is a very likeable, charismatic presense and holds the stage well (though the two giant video monitors certainly help). She can act somewhat and I've heard much worse singing before (though she goes flat whenever she attempts to sustain a note). And, I imagine that her story must inspire some people out there -- a handful of her fan club were in attendance tonight and there were shouts of "You go girl!!" periodically throughout.
When the screens projected the cover of her big confessional autobiography about her dysfunctional past, there was certainly a firm smattering of applause from dozens in the theatre and those same dozens whooped it up when the subsequent Phil Donahue Show promotional appearance for the book was shown. Mind you, most of the rest of the audience sat through this 100 minute self-indulgent presentation in what seemed to be stunned non-applauding silence throughout -- I cannot recall ever seeing so many people getting up from their seats during a show to go to the bathroom or leave the theatre entirely (well over two dozen by my count)
I really don't know how to describe this "show." Imagine a very vapid New Age-y "Long Day's Journey Into Night" starring The Osmonds. Imagine a very special episode of Dr. Phil set to music. Imagine an Al-Anon Meeting in which the person telling their story re-enacts their entire, often pitiful story with a million dollar multimedia presentation -- and a band. Imagine a former sitcom star turned self-help guru, cookbook and diet book author and Home Shopping Network Queen telling you the story of her life in excruciating detail and then lecturing you on how you can be a better person too if you too follow her path. Oh wait. You don't have to imagine the last part -- she still has a few shows left through Saturday.
The "show" is an informercial with musical interludes -- almost none of which make any sense. She describes her Anne Frank-esque childhood memories of hiding in a locked closet from her alcoholic abusive father. The scene is set to her child-like singing of "If I Only Had A Brain" with interjections of slamming doors and the sounds of a demonic-sounding father (reminiscent of the Sith from the Star Wars movies) screaming drunkenly and incoherently throughout. I suppose this was meant to convey the childhood terror she experienced. As staged, seeing a nearly 60 year old woman cowering behind a trunk pretending to be 5 and singing the Scarecrow's theme song was simply odd (and received gales of laughter from my section of the audience).
Later, she gets cast in a high school production of Guys and Dolls as Adelaide. She then gets knocked up shortly afterwards and again the demonic voices of her father criticizing her for being irresponsible and a "loser" fill the stage. So, for musical enhancement, Somers uses snippets of "Take Back Your Mink" to ......... um..........I don't know....... comment on her predicament at that moment? Huh? Maybe this all makes sense in Vegas after a few cocktails, but, here in New York, sober, I was confused.
"Pick Yourself Off, Dust Yourself Off" is employed to underscore the pre-fame period of her life where she was a single mother, getting evicted left and right, bouncing checks (later going to jail for it) and using shopping as a "cheer yourself up" salve. It doesn't quite fit.
There are also incessant refrains of "If You Knew Suzy, Like I Know Suzy" throughout in varying tempos (including a winsome, bathetic torch song rendition in the show's latter half -- may I NEVER hear ANY version of that song again in my lifetime) , a big dramatic version of "50 Percent" (from Ballroom -- the one well-placed number in the show, though Somers lacks the chops to deliver it.... the memory of Dorothy Loudon's original is untouched) and a few original tunes which are good enough, I suppose, but the "book" of this "show" robs them of any real impact. Also, the tinny, plastic synthesized arrangements are simply terrible.
Look, Somers is probably a lovely woman whom I don't wish to toss brickbats at and dismiss. She has been clearly through a lot (though while she mentions her firing, she doesn't really discuss her Three's Company days which were the highlight of her entire career -- Ritter and Dewitt don't merit a single mention in the entire show... she should have dished some dirt) and I'm quite gratified that despite many life setbacks, she has not only survived but flourished, becoming a multimillionaire and now wants to help others find their way through life's difficult obstacles. There's nothing wrong with having that desire and hey, good for her for taking the time and effort to share what she sees as her life lessons -- I certainly don't doubt that there are some people out there who want and need to hear that message.
"The Blonde in the Thunderbird," however, to me, came off as a narcissistic, embarassing exercise in hubris and vanity. It's certainly not the worst show I've ever seen -- perhaps, not even the worst show I've seen in the last year -- but it may be the most (perhaps unintended) exhibition of untamed egotism I've witnessed in MANY a season.
While I think that her message is well-intentioned and genuine (though her coda of "Well, I beat cancer, so you can too" is more than a little naive and ethically insensitive and wrongheaded) at the end of the day -- which is about how long this 100 minute show feels at times -- it's still not a "show" that deserves to be on Broadway and doesn't, in my book, qualify as even being what I would describe as a form of "entertainment." We live in an era when this almost exact story is told every single day of the week on Oprah, Dr. Phil, Montel, etc...... we've heard it all before and providing a musical accompaniment to it and putting it on a Broadway stage, does not make it "art" or even, frankly, "interesting."
She could have done the whole thing much cheaper for her therapist or a group encounter meeting, or simply made it a special event on the Home Shopping Network. Mind you, were this "show" to pop up on television as a true (if somewhat elaborate) infomercial at 2am, I'd have changed the channel....... quickly.
Some personal stories are worth telling on the Broadway stage -- Primo Levi, Charlotte von Mahlsdorff, Golda Meir......... and for showbiz folks, Elaine Stritch, Bea Arthur, Billy Crystal, Lena Horne come to mind. This, however, isn't one of them.
"What a story........ everything but the bloodhounds snappin' at her rear end." -- Birdie
[http://margochanning.broadwayworld.com/]
"The Devil Be Hittin' Me" -- Whitney
Updated On: 7/21/05 at 02:13 AM
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