STAGE DOOR ETIQUETTE- Page 2

[Eris0303]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:30pm

"Have a care for what you say while you?re waiting in line. Gossiping/trash-talking the actors is never a good idea because you don?t know who might overhear you. Keep in mind that most of the people at stage door are avid fans (most of them young) who look up to these actors and idolize them. Or even worse, you could be standing next to someone who actually knows the performer. Just keep a lid on it until you get to the car. If you make some kid cry or get punched in the no-no?s, you?ll definitely regret it."

This happened to me once. This brat was going on and on about a friend of mine. What a jerk he was, etc. He hadn't signed because he wasn't feeling well and he snuck out rather than face the fans. Boy, did I set her straight. Nobody disses my peeps like that - especially when they, literally, have no idea what they're talking about.

[TimeSquare3]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:36pm

Most of the actors/actresses I have met come out of the stage door in jeans,shorts,t-shirts,hoodies,baseball caps(men and women),etc. but if we wear them it's considered tacky? I'm kinda lost on that one.

Val, I'm asking you this sincerely. Are you slow?
They just changed out of their costumes and are going home. You just came from a theatre. Do you see what I am saying? Blink once for no & twice for yes.

Updated On: 4/17/09 at 06:36 PM

[Eris0303]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:42pm

You've just been wearing a wig for hours. Your hair is, literally a mess. Do you want to go out and pose for pictures without putting on a hat?

[DefyGravity777]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:45pm

No I'm not slow. Why should it matter what people are wearing if the performers are dressed the same way while meeting them. Anyway I don't wear jeans and t-shirts to the theatre anyway. Well maybe a few times I have but they were nice jeans and t-shirts.

[TimeSquare3]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:50pm

Because you are supposed to look presentable when you go to the theatre.

[Eris0303]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:56pm

This is the way I see it:

1. The theatre is an upscale place. You've paid upwards of $70 to see this show in a grand and beautiful theatre. I think you should look like you belong in a place like that.

2. The actors can see you.

3. A lot of people say that by dressing nicely you show respect for the actors who are up there working so hard. And they, in turn, show respect for you by giving their all and by stopping at the stage door. I like to take it a step further and say that you're not only showing respect for the cast you are seeing at that moment in time but the institution of theatre as a whole.

4. If you look nice someone might tell you. It happened to me just recently. A very good-looking, but married, actor told me I looked nice. He wasn't trying to pick me up - just pay me a compliment. And you know what...I DID look nice and it was sweet of him to say so. You never know who's going to admire you if you put some effort into your appearance.

Updated On: 4/17/09 at 06:56 PM

[JP2]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 6:57pm

In terms of physical contact, I've never asked for a hug (or a kiss). The actors are usually used to seeing me so much that it's the first thing they do when they see me. :p

[Eris0303]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 7:05pm

"In terms of physical contact, I've never asked for a hug (or a kiss). The actors are usually used to seeing me so much that it's the first thing they do when they see me. :p "

I never ask for hugs but I get them anyway. Just can't help being cute and lovable, right JP?

I do have, what I think, is a funny story about a hug. I was just standing there when an actor hugged me. Didn't ask for it or anything. After he'd walked away I looked up and saw a teenage/adolescent girl glaring at me. She put her two fingers up to her eyes and then pointed them at me in the age-old "I'm watching you" motion. She didn't look too pleased when I burst out laughing. Seriously, fangirls, don't be jealous if "your man" is friendly to someone else.

Updated On: 4/17/09 at 07:05 PM

[DefyGravity777]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 7:07pm

"In terms of physical contact, I've never asked for a hug (or a kiss). The actors are usually used to seeing me so much that it's the first thing they do when they see me. :p"

I wasn't going to post this because I would have been attacked but the same thing happens to me. Well I most likely will be attacked now for saying that...lol.

[bwaylvsong]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 7:25pm

I wear jeans and a t-shirt all the time, but when I do I always tuck it in and put a sportjacket on.

[TimeSquare3]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 7:43pm

I wasn't going to post this because I would have been attacked but the same thing happens to me. Well I most likely will be attacked now for saying that...lol.

HA!

[singtopher]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 7:46pm

re: Clothes at the stage door.

I've been in shows where I've been privileged to have a gamut of folks waiting for the casts autographs at the stage door, and never once did I care what the folks were wearing (as long as they were clothed). Just my $.02.

[winston89]

Posted: 4/17/09 at 9:42pm

I think that there are worse things that can go on in the theatre then not dressing the way others deem fit. Hell, I wouldn't mind sitting next to someone in a garbage bag as long as they are silent, don't eat during the show, don't take out their phones and play with them etc. I honestly don't think that how you dress matters considering that your in a dark building for two and a half hours. And yes, while the actors may see you it isn't like they are going to be able to notice you by the guy with the red shirt on in row D.

[Weez]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 4:20am

I agree with Winston! Look, I've shown my respect by sitting quietly, watching the show, turning my phone off, not chatting to my neighbours, not rustling sweet papers, and applauding appropriately at the end of the show (as opposed to screaming inappropriately at ridiculous moments during the show). My clothes are on the casual side, but they are clean and have no holes in them. How is that so disrespectful that I should be ashamed to go to the stage door? O_o

[legally_popular]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 6:19am

Well for some people, it's a big night out at the theater. I've definitely seen people in dresses and suits and stuff like that. Since I'm more of a regular theater goer I tend to dress more casually and usually stick with nice jeans or pants and a nice top. I don't think dressing up is required for every show and certainly not for the stage door.

[kate86]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 6:51am

well to be honest i went to the theatre in comfy and more casual clothes most of the times. because mostly i rushed for tickets which means i am spending several hours sitting on the ground and spending all day in the city so fancy clothes would be ruined at night. don't misunderstand me i wore nice clothes but not some fancy dress.

and about asking for a hug. i would never dare to ask for a hug from an actor. because imagine some complete strangers come up to you and ask for a hug. if after meeting them several times they approach to hug me i was really happy but i would never dare to ask for one.

i met several actors from blonde at starbucks or on the street. but i never approached them because i don't wanna disturb them in their freetime. sometimes they said hi because they recognized me from sd which is nice. but i try to leave them alone unless they approach me.

[Weez]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 7:44am

If people want to dress nicely for the theatre, that's great. :)

If people want to dress nicely for the theatre and/or sneer at me because I'd rather be comfortable, that's not so great.

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 11:04am

Don't worry about it, Weez. The only person I've ever sneered at was the girl who showed up at Sweeney Todd in enormous baggy sweatpants with "JMU" written down the leg and shoved into dirty Uggs. I wouldn't wear that in public, let alone to the theatre. There's a difference between being comfortable and looking like you've just rolled out of bed.

[Pianolin717]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 11:08am

"enormous baggy sweatpants with "JMU" written down the leg and shoved into dirty Uggs"
Thats JMU for you... pretty much all the girls dress like that on a daily basis wherever they go, thinking it looks attractive. Don't know why thought...

[boombaboy]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 11:19am

Thank you for posting this thread. I have been collecting autographs at stage door for over 30 years and sometimes it is shocking to me to see how people behave. Most actors are very gracious and the most important thing for the fans is to be polite and patient. The actors are generally happy to sign and treat the fans well, because they are professionals. So it's up to us fans to treat them the same way, with respect and courtesy. Thanks again for posting these guidelines.

[nealb1]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 12:56pm

When this topic pops up from time to time on the board, it's rather disturbing to see how some people have absolutely no concept of common sense and how to behave to a complete and total stranger?

You wouldn't go up to a total stranger and hug them, expect an immediate "friendship," or anything like that. So, why would you do that to a performer whom you admire?

Certainly, most people are ok at the stagedoor, but I've seen quite a few crazies. Just because you have seen a person's show a few times, doesn't give you license to think that they owe you anything, aside from a good performance.

There's no law in any Actor's Equity or Non-Equity contract that states that any performer has to come out of the stage door and sign autographs, pose for pics, etc. That's the icing on the cake.



Updated On: 4/18/09 at 12:56 PM

[Perfectly Marvelous]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 1:47pm

I rarely stagedoor (the last time was nearly two years ago) but when I do, I try to be polite as possible. However, I admit that when I met Raul Esparza, I geeked out a little and said something to the effect of "You're my hero!"

As for dressing up? When I went to New York with my theatre group, my drama teacher basically said to us, "You're going to a Broadway show. You're not wearing jeans. Wear something nice." Usually, I wear anything from pair a of black pants and cute top to a skirt and blouse or a stylish dress. (Depending on how the weather is and what kind of show it is).

[madscientist]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 3:51pm

"As for dressing up? When I went to New York with my theatre group, my drama teacher basically said to us, "You're going to a Broadway show. You're not wearing jeans. Wear something nice." Usually, I wear anything from pair a of black pants and cute top to a skirt and blouse or a stylish dress. (Depending on how the weather is and what kind of show it is)."

really? my theatre teacher actually told us we didn't have to dress up, but if we wanted to to make a night out of it, we could. Now, I've never gone in sweatpants(and honestly, I wouldn't even attend class dressed that way), but I would usually wear dark pants and nice T-shirt because I'm usually coming to the theatre after a long day of work, school, or spending time in nyc hanging out. I mean, I suppose I could bring clothes to change into, but no one's really given me a hard time about how I looked.

" If you look nice someone might tell you. It happened to me just recently. A very good-looking, but married, actor told me I looked nice. He wasn't trying to pick me up - just pay me a compliment. And you know what...I DID look nice and it was sweet of him to say so. You never know who's going to admire you if you put some effort into your appearance. "

I've actually had that happen to me, when I was only wearing black pants and a nice T-shirt. They said I looked cute and they liked my clothes and it made me happy. I have dressed up nice for the theatre, but that was when I had someone driving me into the city and my tickets were already purchased, etc.

As for asking for hugs, I could never get up the nerve to do it, and I think it's kind of awkward for the actor because what if they didn't want to hug you? I know they could just say no, but I would imagine it would be awkward. I always hate it when people I'm not close friends with expect me to hug them every time I see them. And as for bringing gifts, I really can't afford to do it, but as others said, I think it would be a little weird.

[winston89]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 4:16pm

I think the only time I got a hug at the stage door of a show was when I went back and saw A Chorus Line in Boston the next day killing time for my train back to college. Nikki Snelson walked up to me and gave me a warm hug and started to chat with me for a few min. It was nice, not saying it wasn't. But, I wouldn't have asked for one.

[Perfectly Marvelous]

Posted: 4/18/09 at 8:24pm

really? my theatre teacher actually told us we didn't have to dress up, but if we wanted to to make a night out of it, we could. Now, I've never gone in sweatpants(and honestly, I wouldn't even attend class dressed that way), but I would usually wear dark pants and nice T-shirt because I'm usually coming to the theatre after a long day of work, school, or spending time in nyc hanging out. I mean, I suppose I could bring clothes to change into, but no one's really given me a hard time about how I looked.

Mine was big on theatre ettitique, so he wanted to make sure all of us knew that we had to look and be on our best behavior.

I'm not saying his way of thinking was right, but it's influenced how I usually dress when I attend a show. Unless it's a high school production or college show, then I'll usually wear a nice pair of jeans and a t-shirt.