The East Bay Express' hysterical Lestat review

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:38am

In addition to his flowing-maned Harlequin Romance visage, Lestat's titular hero is just ... so ... emo. He starts off impotently sparring with his daddy (shades of Phil Collins' "No Son of Mine" -- perhaps Sir Elton's sly nod to a contemporary) and whining daintily to his mom on bended knee with his head in her lap. From there he flees to Paris, gets bitten ("The thirst makes me thirsty!"), bites his mom (for companionship, or course), pisses off a rival bloodsucker dude, starts a theater company, and conducts a decade-long search for some reclusive vampire messiah who will ostensibly teach him to stop acting like such a puss. The playbill informs us that songs are performed during these events, but that's applying the word "song" rather liberally, I think. My notes during this act include "WTF," "Shut up," and "Melodies be suckin'."
Oh, but there's MORE

[iliketheater]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:46am

wow.

[The Distinctive Baritone]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 7:56am

"badassery," he he

[mominator]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 8:16am

Oh dear so will this be the death of vampire musicals?

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 8:51am

The headline and subhed are fantastic:

Emo Vampire Chateau
I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind, if I put down in words how much Elton John's Lestat musical sucks.

[jarretSF]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 12:44pm

Best - Quote - EVER!


"It's like watching Fabio do overwrought interpretive dances to Fiery Furnaces records."

[sweeneyfan]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 12:54pm

Yeah, but did he like it?

Hehehe... FINALLY an honest review (whether you agree with him or not)

[justme2]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 1:10pm

As much as I agree with several areas the reviewer brings up...I question his journalistic style. It's not a very professional piece of writing. Reminds me of high school reviewers.

(insert your jokes about Lestat being high schoolish here)

[popcultureboy]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 1:11pm

Jarrett, I was about to post the exact same quote. That review is high-larious.

[cheezedoodle]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 1:30pm

Justme - that's basically what the East Bay express is. High school journalism at it's best.

[jarretSF]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 1:43pm

It is horrible journalism, but hysterical! I think I'm going to use the fabio line when anyone asks me about the show.

[justme2]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 1:44pm

I'd never read this publication before, and "reviews" like that make me glad I don't.

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:11pm

The East Bay Express is certainly not mainstream. They know it and their readers know it. Have you ever read the SF Weekly or SF Bay Guardian? They're all cut from the same cloth.

It's just a different style, is all. And I like it.

[LeaGirl]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:16pm

I think his use of the word "hootenany" was what sold me.

[cheezedoodle]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:18pm

Yes Justme - there is a reason they give it away for free.

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:21pm

Oh, but the ads are fun!

(Not the ones in the inside back cover, of course, but...)

[justme2]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 2:55pm

Yes, I read Bay Guardian and SF Weekly. You are right; they are all the same kind of style.

But, if you want to right a review of a show..write a review. This piece should have been called Op Ed.

Updated On: 1/29/06 at 02:55 PM

[RentBoy86]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 4:54pm

(Not the ones in the inside back cover, of course, but...)
----> What's that mean?

I think its great writing. Its written with a nice witty edge to it. The first review that I've read about this show where I actually was interested in the review. He simply talks on a very conversational level and I like it. Not all reviews have to be written with big words and no sort of opinion.

[SorryGrateful]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 5:08pm

Whether it's true or not, that's still some pretty funny stuff.

[justme2]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 6:30pm

Hey, I laughed my ass off at the piece. It's funny as hell and enjoyable to read. But...it's not a "review".

Although this is one of my favorite paragraphs of the "review", it lacks something that a review should have.....something of a description of the "first act disaster" so the reader knows what the writer is actually referring to:

"Avast: This naysayer speaks the truth. Lestat's first act is a disaster, from which its moderately rousing second act cannot recover. Like the Bible or your average NBA game, you needn't bother paying attention until halfway through; one person who seems to have heeded this advice is Elton John himself."

I enjoyed reading it very much for what it is...an Op Ed piece about this guy's night out at Lestat. And no, I am not asking for "big words and opinions". That's not what is lacking.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 7:02pm

What I would give to read "WTF" in a Ben Brantley review! That pretty much sums it all up. Sadly, this show is filled with "WTF" moments. I like that he's honest and real. Somethings don't need to be over analyzed. Updated On: 1/12/06 at 07:02 PM

[Mr Roxy]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 8:13pm

Sound like a trainwreck of epic proportions

I cannot wait to see it

[Dollypop]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 8:51pm

Wow! This show sounds even worse than IN MY LIFE!!!!! Suddenly LESTAT is on my must-see list!!!

This may be a banner year for memorable flops on Broadway!

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 1/12/06 at 10:46pm

But it's TWICE as long as In My Life!

Twice the enjoyment? Maybe?

[Radioactiveduck]

Posted: 1/28/06 at 11:55pm

Poor Hugh, he deserves better than this.