What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

#1

What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 10:32pm

Send in the clowns
It's your 5th Birthday

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If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#2

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 10:48pm

Ah, Miss you a lot!

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"Chicago is it's own incredible theater town right there smack down in the middle of the heartland. What a great city! I can see why Oprah likes to live there!" - Dee Hoty :-D

#3

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 10:52pm

I know that I've upset you,
I know I've been unkind
I wanted you to vanish
From sight
But now I see you
In a different light,
And though I cannot love you.
I wish that I could love you.
Happy Anniversary!

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"If there is going to be a restoration fee, there should also be a Renaissance fee, a Middle Ages fee and a Dark Ages fee. Someone must have men in the back room making up names, euphemisms for profit." (Emanuel Azenberg)

#4

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:01pm

If i would write a birthday greeting for him with very little thought, especially about potential misunderstandings:

Happy Birthday to Jew! Happy Birthday to Jew! I wish i was one to o. Happy Birthday to Jew!

Was that offensive or just an example of bad word humour? I guess you will say both.

#5

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:04pm

Every Day a Little Death


Sorry for your loss.

#6

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:12pm

Congratulations on your Wedding!
It's a very short road from
The pinch to the punch
To the paunch and the ouch
and the pension!

#7

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:14pm

Tragedy Tommorrow
Comedy Tonight!

Happy Wedding Day

#8

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:16pm

This could become my favorite thread EVER!

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"It's not so much do what you like, as it is that you like what you do." SS

"Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana." GMarx

#9

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:21pm

Here's to the girls on the go,
Everybody tries.
Look into their eyes and you'll see what they know,
Everybody dies.
Happy 50th.

Could I leave you?
Guess.
Happy anniversary!

#10

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:28pm

It'll sting a little, but not for long. Sorry for your loss.

And I'll think of some more later. ::subscribes to thread::

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"Writing should be easy, like a monkey driving a speedboat..." -[title of show] "I'm tired of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and meet up with them later." -Mitch Hedberg

#11

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:29pm

Children may not obey,
But children will listen.
Children will look to you
For which way to turn,
To learn what to be.

Congrats on your first child.

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for fierce, fabulous and fun times visit eric mathew's world. http://ericmathew.blogspot.com/

#12

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:30pm

Everybody out to have a maid.
Everybody ought to have a working girl.

Congrats on your first prostitute.

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for fierce, fabulous and fun times visit eric mathew's world. http://ericmathew.blogspot.com/

#13

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:33pm

I Know things now
Many wonderful things
That I never knew before
Happy Graduation!!

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If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#14

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:39pm

Try Pirelli's Miracle Elixir
Yes, it does the trick sir
Congratulations on your new business venture!

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If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

Updated On: 11/12/06 at 11:39 PM

#15

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/12/06 at 11:55pm

What can you do on a Staurday Night Alone?

Sorry to hear of your divorce.

#16

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 12:10am

Nothing's gonna harm you
Not while I'm around.
Good luck with your new rottweiler

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If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#17

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 12:14am

It's I Do
and You Don't
And Nobody Said That
and who brought the Subject up first?


Happy 50th Anniversary!

#18

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 12:14am

Little more than a glance
Is enough to show you
Just how small you are.

Good luck with the surgery.

#19

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 12:24am

Mama
ma ma ma Mama


Happy Mother's Day!

#20

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 12:31am

It's the little things....
the little things
the little things
the little things...

Good Luck on that Penile Operation!

#21

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 1:18am

Bobby
Bobby
Bobby baby
Robbie
Bobby
Bobby
Bobby

Happy birthday, Robert!

#22

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 1:19am

Ok, my try at a wedding invitation with inspiration from the Ballad of Sweeney Todd.


Attend a wedding that’s fairly odd

The place is Kennedy's cape of cod

Don’t tell the bride the groom is gay

Cause he wouldn’t want you to give it away

Dress slipshod

Dress slipshod odd

Please tell us if you don't eat ...

meat

.......
alternative second line

housed in a church at the cape of cod

Updated On: 11/13/06 at 01:19 AM

#23

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 1:31am

Don't worry, relax. It's only a play.

Good show!

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Somebody sit in my chair, and ruin my sleep, and make me aware of being alive!

#24

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 9:07am

Hard to see the light now
Just don't let it go
Things will come out right now
We can make it so

Condolences on your loss.

#25

re: What if Sondheim wrote greeting cards?

Posted: 11/13/06 at 12:20pm

See the pretty girl in that mirror there:
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face,
Such a pretty dress,
Such a pretty smile,
Such a pretty me!

Good luck on your plastic surgery!

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Don't be too sure I'm as crooked as I'm supposed to be.