I have to admit, I've sometimes equated acting "too gay" with bad acting, because bad acting is occasionally expressed as being too gay.
I saw Godspell at a community theater production and the actor playing Jesus was noticeably effeminate from the moment he came out on stage. This could have been overlooked, but when it got to the point that he was (literally) grabbing other guys' asses and winking at them, it was no longer considered "acting too gay" with actually BEING gay- no acting involved and just happening to be onstage at the time.
This happened when I was 12; I never returned to that theater and I never saw Godspell again. Something about making a religious figure flamboyantly gay really bothered me. So when an actor in another show I'm seeing happens to be slightly effeminate, I regress and worry that- oh god, it's happening again and another show is ruined for me. While I've never encountered another case of bad acting quite like this since, it does make me a bit more sensitive.
The problem isn't gay actors, it's bad actors that cannot effectively portray the character, for whatever reason. If too much of your own personality comes out, it's not considered acting anymore.
Like a firework unexploded
Wanting life but never
knowing how