Alexandra Waterbury Instagram Post- Page 5

[Mike Barrett]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 12:49pm

Impossible2 said: "JSquared2 said: "Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "How about the general public realising that if they are stupid enough to allow someone to take nude pictures of them or are willing to sendnude pictures of themselves to other people this stuff is going to happen..."

Catching up on this thread, I want to reiterate that while I am not 100%familiar with Amar's case and not commenting on that case specifically, THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." Or, "Well, that black person went to an all white school, did they really not expect a problem with at least somebody?" Or, "Anyone engaging in sexual activity should expect SOMETHING to go wrong, if not they're idiots".

What an an absolutely shameful post, Impossible2. You really need to apologize. Disturbing, quite frankly."

Its absolutely nothing like any of those things, but keep trying..."

Thank you, Impossible2!"

Seriously, we seem to have a whole generation of people who have no common sense what so ever and then turn around and blame others when they make a mistake and it backfires. If you don't want to get hit by a car, don't step out in front of a car. If you don't want to get an STI, don't have unsafe sex. If you don't want nude pictures of yourself shared amongst weirdos, don't allow nude photos of yourself to be taken and don't take any of yourself and share them.

This is not rocket science.

I will also state my post was not gender specific, this applies to anyone who does it...ANYONE!

Does it make me not think this guy is a creep, no, I think he's a creep and I do think what he did was wrong, as I have stated a million times before. But hedidn't commit a crime, as it was not done out of malice andhas also apologised and hopefullylearned his lesson.

It is also very clear he was in the company of a predator and did not realise and was inadvertantly draw into his games. The only thing he is guilty of istrying to impress the wrong crowd and being an idiot...frankly pretty much the same thing as the girl who allowed the photo to be taken. They were both trying to impress a douchebag to 'fit in'!

If you are going to entrust your dignity to others, then you are just asking for trouble. Does it make it right no, but you do have to take some responsibility in the situation. If this had happened to me I'd have thought 'well I won't do that again', had nothing to do with the person again and that would've been the end of it."

Dude, you don't get it. The problem is they never asked for the photos to be shared, and they were. You are 100% condoning that behavior. "They shouldn't have taken the photo" THAT IS PUTTING THE BLAME SQUARELY ON THE VICTIM. There's zero other way to look at this. That is blaming the victim in this scenario. I understand you don't believe they were a victim, because you clearly condone sharing pictures of people without their permission, which is just disgusting. You are blaming the person who took the photo of themselves, with the intent to share it with one person, for it getting to people they do not even know. Again, blaming the victim. 

Im sorry for you that you are unable to understand this, and I fear for anyone who may be subject to any behavior like this who is around you in life. Utterly shameful. 

[Mike Barrett]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 12:52pm

Impossible2 said: "If you share nude pictures with someonethere is a very good chance theyare being shared with others, it's as simple as that.

You don't think a group of women sitting around a table having drinks and flicking through Tinder aren't sharing any dick pics they receive with theirfriends...really? Same thing with a group of men.

Anyone who doesn't think so is deluded and needs a reality check.

"

Again, another example of you clearly condoning sharing naked pictures of others to anyone you want. This may be how YOU act, but I can assure you this is not normal behavior. You're a monster. Posting picture to tinder naked is different then sending it to someone privately. JFC, this is insane that I have to explain this to an adult. 

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:01pm

Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "JSquared2 said: "Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "How about the general public realising that if they are stupid enough to allow someone to take nude pictures of them or are willing to sendnude pictures of themselves to other people this stuff is going to happen..."

Catching up on this thread, I want to reiterate that while I am not 100%familiar with Amar's case and not commenting on that case specifically, THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." Or, "Well, that black person went to an all white school, did they really not expect a problem with at least somebody?" Or, "Anyone engaging in sexual activity should expect SOMETHING to go wrong, if not they're idiots".

What an an absolutely shameful post, Impossible2. You really need to apologize. Disturbing, quite frankly."

Its absolutely nothing like any of those things, but keep trying..."

Thank you, Impossible2!"

Seriously, we seem to have a whole generation of people who have no common sense what so ever and then turn around and blame others when they make a mistake and it backfires. If you don't want to get hit by a car, don't step out in front of a car. If you don't want to get an STI, don't have unsafe sex. If you don't want nude pictures of yourself shared amongst weirdos, don't allow nude photos of yourself to be taken and don't take any of yourself and share them.

This is not rocket science.

I will also state my post was not gender specific, this applies to anyone who does it...ANYONE!

Does it make me not think this guy is a creep, no, I think he's a creep and I do think what he did was wrong, as I have stated a million times before. But hedidn't commit a crime, as it was not done out of malice andhas also apologised and hopefullylearned his lesson.

It is also very clear he was in the company of a predator and did not realise and was inadvertantly draw into his games. The only thing he is guilty of istrying to impress the wrong crowd and being an idiot...frankly pretty much the same thing as the girl who allowed the photo to be taken. They were both trying to impress a douchebag to 'fit in'!

If you are going to entrust your dignity to others, then you are just asking for trouble. Does it make it right no, but you do have to take some responsibility in the situation. If this had happened to me I'd have thought 'well I won't do that again', had nothing to do with the person again and that would've been the end of it."

Dude, you don't get it. The problem is they never asked for the photos to be shared, and they were. You are 100% condoning that behavior. "They shouldn't have taken the photo" THAT IS PUTTING THE BLAME SQUARELY ON THE VICTIM. There's zero other way to look at this. That is blaming the victim in this scenario. I understand you don't believe they were a victim, because you clearly condone sharing pictures of people without their permission, which is just disgusting. You are blaming the person who took the photo of themselves, with the intent to share it with one person, for it getting to people they do not even know. Again, blaming the victim.

Im sorry for you that you are unable to understand this, and I fear for anyone who may be subject to any behavior like this who is around you in life. Utterly shameful."

I'm sorry YOU don't understand it. You have a hell of a lot more faith in people than I do.

I am not condoning ANY of the behaviour on either side of the fence, I think they are both stupid. I have also stated a million times I think what the guy did was wrong, but y'all just seem to skim over those bits every single time to push your own agendas.

As I have stated in other threads on the subject, I have been in situations where people have brought out photos/videos in front of me of other people and I have walked away and had nothing to do with those people again. I think it is disgusting and wrong. 

This is also a generational thing that people have fallen into of their own free will. This kinda of stuff would never have happened when I was growing up and if it did I would certainly not have been involved in it. If anyone asks me to send nudes I say no. If anyone sends me nudes they are blocked.

If you choose to allow yourself to be involved in the behaviour, then you open yourself up to the problems surrounding that behaviour it's as simple as that.

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:02pm

Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "If you share nude pictures with someonethere is a very good chance theyare being shared with others, it's as simple as that.

You don't think a group of women sitting around a table having drinks and flicking through Tinder aren't sharing any dick pics they receive with theirfriends...really? Same thing with a group of men.

Anyone who doesn't think so is deluded and needs a reality check.

"

Again, another example of you clearly condoning sharing naked pictures of others to anyone you want. This may be how YOU act, but I can assure you this is not normal behavior. You're a monster. Posting picture to tinder naked is different then sending it to someone privately. JFC, this is insane that I have to explain this to an adult."

I have never taken a naked picture of myself, nor have I ever asked to see naked photos of anyone else. I have no interest in it at all. I don't even watch pornography on moral grounds.

So you may want to keep your assumptions to yourself.

[haterobics]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:03pm

Mike Barrett said: "Again, another example of you clearly condoning sharing naked pictures of others to anyone you want."

Is saying something is likely to happen condoning it, though?!

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:04pm

haterobics said: "Mike Barrett said: "Again, another example of you clearly condoning sharing naked pictures of others to anyone you want."

Is saying something is likely to happen condoning it, though?!"

It's like he is literally reading every third word of a sentence that I post. I haven't said anything even remotely like what he is saying I have.

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:07pm

Mike Barrett said: "THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." "

One recurring theme of this thread, and every Amar/WSS thread, is that people conflate what Amar did with sexual assault. Even here, you say "this is very close to..." and then reference assault.

I'm going to state this plainly: if you consensually send a nude photo to someone, they are allowed to privately share it, assuming their intent is not to cause harm to the subject of the photo. It's legal.

The key difference between Mike Barrett's victim blaming examples, and Amar's victim, are that those are victims of crimes. There is an expectation that everyone will follow the law; the victim cannot be blamed if someone acts outside of the law.

However when something is governed by morals, rather than the law, it becomes fuzzy. Morals vary from person to person. If you assume that someone will morally act a certain way, and they do not, you must assume some blame for misjudging their character.

Sharing nude photos is a situation that is governed by morals. Amar's girlfriend misjudged his. So, be it "victim blaming" or not, let this be a The More You Know moment: if you share nudes with your partner, they can legally share them in private. If you are counting on their strong moral fiber to keep your nudes private, then godspeed, but the law will not stop them and the possibility exists that you've misjudged their character.

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:09pm

ctorres23 said: "Mike Barrett said: "THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." "

One recurring theme of this thread, and every Amar/WSS thread, is that people conflate what Amar did with sexual assault. Even here, you say "this is very close to..." and then reference assault.

I'm going to state this plainly: if you consensually send a nude photo to someone, they are allowed to privately share it, assuming their intent is not to cause harm to the subject of the photo. It's legal.

The key difference between Mike Barrett's victim blaming examples, and Amar's victim, are that those are victims of crimes. There is an expectation that everyone will follow the law; the victim cannot be blamed if someone acts outside of the law.

However when something is governed by morals, rather than the law, it becomes fuzzy. Morals vary from person to person. If you assume that someone will morally act a certain way, and they do not, you must assume some blame for misjudging their character.

Sharing nude photos is a situation that is governed by morals. Amar's girlfriend misjudged his. So, be it "victim blaming" or not, let this be a The More You Know moment: if you share nudes with your partner, they can legally share them in private. If you are counting on their strong moral fiber to keep your nudes private, then godspeed, but the law will not stop them and the possibility exists that you've misjudged their character."

He hasn't even by his own admission read what happened, all he is doing is throwing judgement on others without even bothering to find out the facts of the case.

[Mike Barrett]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:15pm

Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "JSquared2 said: "Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "How about the general public realising that if they are stupid enough to allow someone to take nude pictures of them or are willing to sendnude pictures of themselves to other people this stuff is going to happen..."

Catching up on this thread, I want to reiterate that while I am not 100%familiar with Amar's case and not commenting on that case specifically, THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." Or, "Well, that black person went to an all white school, did they really not expect a problem with at least somebody?" Or, "Anyone engaging in sexual activity should expect SOMETHING to go wrong, if not they're idiots".

What an an absolutely shameful post, Impossible2. You really need to apologize. Disturbing, quite frankly."

Its absolutely nothing like any of those things, but keep trying..."

Thank you, Impossible2!"

Seriously, we seem to have a whole generation of people who have no common sense what so ever and then turn around and blame others when they make a mistake and it backfires. If you don't want to get hit by a car, don't step out in front of a car. If you don't want to get an STI, don't have unsafe sex. If you don't want nude pictures of yourself shared amongst weirdos, don't allow nude photos of yourself to be taken and don't take any of yourself and share them.

This is not rocket science.

I will also state my post was not gender specific, this applies to anyone who does it...ANYONE!

Does it make me not think this guy is a creep, no, I think he's a creep and I do think what he did was wrong, as I have stated a million times before. But hedidn't commit a crime, as it was not done out of malice andhas also apologised and hopefullylearned his lesson.

It is also very clear he was in the company of a predator and did not realise and was inadvertantly draw into his games. The only thing he is guilty of istrying to impress the wrong crowd and being an idiot...frankly pretty much the same thing as the girl who allowed the photo to be taken. They were both trying to impress a douchebag to 'fit in'!

If you are going to entrust your dignity to others, then you are just asking for trouble. Does it make it right no, but you do have to take some responsibility in the situation. If this had happened to me I'd have thought 'well I won't do that again', had nothing to do with the person again and that would've been the end of it."

Dude, you don't get it. The problem is they never asked for the photos to be shared, and they were. You are 100% condoning that behavior. "They shouldn't have taken the photo" THAT IS PUTTING THE BLAME SQUARELY ON THE VICTIM. There's zero other way to look at this. That is blaming the victim in this scenario. I understand you don't believe they were a victim, because you clearly condone sharing pictures of people without their permission, which is just disgusting. You are blaming the person who took the photo of themselves, with the intent to share it with one person, for it getting to people they do not even know. Again, blaming the victim.

Im sorry for you that you are unable to understand this, and I fear for anyone who may be subject to any behavior like this who is around you in life. Utterly shameful."

I'm sorry YOU don't understand it. You have a hell of a lot more faith in people than I do.

I am not condoning ANY of the behaviour on either side of the fence, I think they are both stupid. I have also stated a million times I think what the guy did was wrong, but y'all just seem to skim over those bits every single time to push your own agendas.

As I have stated in other threads on the subject, I have been in situations where people have brought out photos/videos in front of me of other people and I have walked away and had nothing to do with those people again. I think it is disgusting and wrong.

This is also a generational thing that people have fallen into of their own free will. This kinda of stuff would never have happened when I was growing up and if it did I would certainly not have been involved in it. If anyone asks me to send nudes I say no. If anyone sends me nudes they are blocked.

If you choose to allow yourself to be involved in the behaviour, then you open yourself up to the problems surrounding that behaviourit's as simple as that."

The reason we "skim" past it is because when you say things like

"You don't think a group of women sitting around a table having drinks and flicking through Tinder aren't sharing any dick pics they receive with theirfriends...really? Same thing with a group of men.
Anyone who doesn't think so is deluded and needs a reality check"

 

How is this the response of someone who finds that behavior disgusting? I don't need a reality check to know that this behavior is wrong, and I know its happening. Hence why everyone is so upset by the casting of this dude in WSS. For you to blow it off as "This stuff happens, oh well" is just wrong. Its like you don't care. Maybe I've misspoken and saying you fully condone this behavior, so my apologies, but this kind of reaction is what is wrong with this current society. You make it seem so black and white. 

Things need to be done about this, and how wrong this kind of behavior is, and you just normalize it. Thats a major f'ing problem. There should be more outrage than "well it happens, bound to". Just a weak response, in my opinion and frankly still comes off as blaming the victim here. I 100% stand by the fact that you are blaming the victim in this case, whether you think what this actor did was wrong or not, you have not put the blame on them, you have put the blame solely on the person who's taken the picture. Giving all the power to Amar, and zero power to the victim. You say he's wrong, but always go back to the photo in the first place. Its just disgusting, sorry. 

Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior. Is it direct condoning of Amar? No. However by continuing to place the blame on the victim continues to just kill any chance for any victim, man or woman, to speak up and have power over themselves and their body. To respond by saying "Well, it happens!" is a very deep, unconscious bias of condoning his behavior, yes. Its a very complicated matter, and nowhere near as black and white as Impossible2 is trying to make it. 

[Mike Barrett]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:19pm

ctorres23 said: "Mike Barrett said: "THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." "

One recurring theme of this thread, and every Amar/WSS thread, is that people conflate what Amar did with sexual assault. Even here, you say "this is very close to..." and then reference assault.

I'm going to state this plainly: if you consensually send a nude photo to someone, they are allowed to privately share it, assuming their intent is not to cause harm to the subject of the photo. It's legal.

The key difference between Mike Barrett's victim blaming examples, and Amar's victim, are that those are victims of crimes. There is an expectation that everyone will follow the law; the victim cannot be blamed if someone acts outside of the law.

However when something is governed by morals, rather than the law, it becomes fuzzy. Morals vary from person to person. If you assume that someone will morally act a certain way, and they do not, you must assume some blame for misjudging their character.

Sharing nude photos is a situation that is governed by morals. Amar's girlfriend misjudged his. So, be it "victim blaming" or not, let this be a The More You Know moment: if you share nudes with your partner, they can legally share them in private. If you are counting on their strong moral fiber to keep your nudes private, then godspeed, but the law will not stop them and the possibility exists that you've misjudged their character."

This is entirely fair and you are correct, the comparisons are not the exact same. However, the way Impsosible just breezes by Amar's behavior is disgusting, and wrong. Maybe this all comes down to moral compass, I guess. Ive read every single word you have posted, Impossible, and yes, you continue to blame the victim in this scenario. It was not an illegal act, but you are blaming the victim nonetheless. As I said earlier, I hope no one in your life has to deal with you and this in their life. 
EDIT: I have also said that I am responding directly to your comment regarding sharing photos, not this specific case at WSS although I am referencing it for comparison. I think you are the one who needs to learn to read here. 

Updated On: 12/18/19 at 01:19 PM

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:25pm

Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "JSquared2 said: "Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "How about the general public realising that if they are stupid enough to allow someone to take nude pictures of them or are willing to sendnude pictures of themselves to other people this stuff is going to happen..."

Catching up on this thread, I want to reiterate that while I am not 100%familiar with Amar's case and not commenting on that case specifically, THIS, is indeed, victim blaming. This is getting very close to saying "If ___ didn't dress so beautiful, put on all her makeup, and be around horny guys all night she wouldn't have a problem." Or, "Well, that black person went to an all white school, did they really not expect a problem with at least somebody?" Or, "Anyone engaging in sexual activity should expect SOMETHING to go wrong, if not they're idiots".

What an an absolutely shameful post, Impossible2. You really need to apologize. Disturbing, quite frankly."

Its absolutely nothing like any of those things, but keep trying..."

Thank you, Impossible2!"

Seriously, we seem to have a whole generation of people who have no common sense what so ever and then turn around and blame others when they make a mistake and it backfires. If you don't want to get hit by a car, don't step out in front of a car. If you don't want to get an STI, don't have unsafe sex. If you don't want nude pictures of yourself shared amongst weirdos, don't allow nude photos of yourself to be taken and don't take any of yourself and share them.

This is not rocket science.

I will also state my post was not gender specific, this applies to anyone who does it...ANYONE!

Does it make me not think this guy is a creep, no, I think he's a creep and I do think what he did was wrong, as I have stated a million times before. But hedidn't commit a crime, as it was not done out of malice andhas also apologised and hopefullylearned his lesson.

It is also very clear he was in the company of a predator and did not realise and was inadvertantly draw into his games. The only thing he is guilty of istrying to impress the wrong crowd and being an idiot...frankly pretty much the same thing as the girl who allowed the photo to be taken. They were both trying to impress a douchebag to 'fit in'!

If you are going to entrust your dignity to others, then you are just asking for trouble. Does it make it right no, but you do have to take some responsibility in the situation. If this had happened to me I'd have thought 'well I won't do that again', had nothing to do with the person again and that would've been the end of it."

Dude, you don't get it. The problem is they never asked for the photos to be shared, and they were. You are 100% condoning that behavior. "They shouldn't have taken the photo" THAT IS PUTTING THE BLAME SQUARELY ON THE VICTIM. There's zero other way to look at this. That is blaming the victim in this scenario. I understand you don't believe they were a victim, because you clearly condone sharing pictures of people without their permission, which is just disgusting. You are blaming the person who took the photo of themselves, with the intent to share it with one person, for it getting to people they do not even know. Again, blaming the victim.

Im sorry for you that you are unable to understand this, and I fear for anyone who may be subject to any behavior like this who is around you in life. Utterly shameful."

I'm sorry YOU don't understand it. You have a hell of a lot more faith in people than I do.

I am not condoning ANY of the behaviour on either side of the fence, I think they are both stupid. I have also stated a million times I think what the guy did was wrong, but y'all just seem to skim over those bits every single time to push your own agendas.

As I have stated in other threads on the subject, I have been in situations where people have brought out photos/videos in front of me of other people and I have walked away and had nothing to do with those people again. I think it is disgusting and wrong.

This is also a generational thing that people have fallen into of their own free will. This kinda of stuff would never have happened when I was growing up and if it did I would certainly not have been involved in it. If anyone asks me to send nudes I say no. If anyone sends me nudes they are blocked.

If you choose to allow yourself to be involved in the behaviour, then you open yourself up to the problems surrounding that behaviourit's as simple as that."

The reason we "skim" past it is because when you say things like

"You don't think a group of women sitting around a table having drinks and flicking through Tinder aren't sharing any dick pics they receive with theirfriends...really? Same thing with a group of men.
Anyone who doesn't think so is deluded and needs a reality check"



How is this the response of someone who finds that behavior disgusting? I don't need a reality check to know that this behavior is wrong, and I know its happening. Hence why everyone is so upset by the casting of this dude in WSS. For you to blow it off as "This stuff happens, oh well" is just wrong. Its like you don't care. Maybe I've misspoken and saying you fully condone this behavior, so my apologies, but this kind of reaction is what is wrong with this current society. You make it seem so black and white.

Things need to be done about this, and how wrong this kind of behavior is, and you just normalize it. Thats a major f'ing problem. There should be more outrage than "well it happens, bound to". Just a weak response, in my opinion and frankly still comes off as blaming the victim here. I 100% stand by the fact that you are blaming the victim in this case, whether you think whatthis actor did was wrong or not, you have not put the blame on them, you have put the blame solely on the person who's taken the picture. Giving all the power to Amar, and zero power to the victim. You say he's wrong, but always go back to the photo in the first place.Its just disgusting, sorry.

Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior. Is it direct condoning of Amar? No. However by continuing to place the blame on the victim continues to just kill any chance for any victim, man or woman, to speak up and have power over themselves and their body. To respond by saying "Well, it happens!" is a verydeep,unconscious bias of condoninghis behavior, yes. Its a very complicated matter, and nowhere near as black and white as Impossible2 is trying to make it."

I did not condone anything, I said it happens and is pretty common place. I also said I thought it was disgusting, but that also seems to have been lost.

Anyways I am done here. It seems everything I type is being misunderstood, so either I am dyslexic or just really **** at trying to get my point across.

 

[haterobics]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:30pm

Mike Barrett said: "Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior."

The whole thing sounds a bit shaky, though. For them to blame the victim, they would have to believe there is a victim, which is where the disconnect is... 

[Mike Barrett]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 1:44pm

haterobics said: "Mike Barrett said: "Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior."

The whole thing sounds a bit shaky, though. For them to blame the victim, they would have to believe there is a victim, which is where the disconnect is..."

THIS, is my entire point. Thank you for being able to get this across more clearly than I have been able to. 
 

The point is you do not see a victim. You don’t condone his behavior, sure, but you also are not seeing a victim in this scenario and that is the problem. That’s why I assume you condone this behavior, because anyone who doesn’t expect this to happen is “deluded and needs a reality check”, according to you. 

Impossible, you seriously need a reality check. There’s a victim when things like sending an unwanted picture of yourself to others happens, illegal or not. That is the problem here and it’s one you clearly do not understand and have no intention of fixing, and have no sympathy for. It’s good to know. I stand by everything I’ve said. 

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:01pm

Mike Barrett said: "haterobics said: "Mike Barrett said: "Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior."

The whole thing sounds a bit shaky, though. For them to blame the victim, they would have to believe there is a victim, which is where the disconnect is..."

THIS, is my entire point. Thank you for being able to get this across more clearly than I have been able to.


The point is you do not see a victim. You don’t condone his behavior, sure, but you also are not seeing a victim in this scenario and that is the problem. That’s why I assume you condone this behavior, because anyone who doesn’t expect this to happen is “deluded and needs a reality check”, according to you.

Impossible, you seriously need a reality check. There’s a victim when things like sending an unwanted picture of yourself to others happens, illegal or not. That is the problem here and it’s one you clearly do not understand and have no intention of fixing, and have no sympathy for. It’s good to know. I stand by everything I’ve said."

Last post.

I never blamed or shamed anyone, I said I thought she was naive for trusting a guy she didn't really know take nude photos of her. But I am not blaming or shaming her I just think anyone who allows themselves to be taken advantage of like that is silly for putting themselves in that position. Why did he need to to take nude photos of her? Why did he need them? What was he going to do with these photos? I don't get it. I don't get why he wanted to take them and I don't understand why she let him take them. Why did he have a stash of photos from all these women he had slept with and why did they also allow him to take them. I do not understand any of it.

All I know is that if the photos did not exist in the first place, none of this would've happened, so if there is a crime here, they both have a share in the blame. That is not blaming her I am blaming both of them for the photos existing. I also have empathy for her, I imagine she felt extremely betrayed, degraded and hurt by him sharing them and once again for the 50th time (even though you won't read it) he is 100% to blame for sharing them and is a douchebag for doing so.

[Mike Barrett]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:11pm

Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "haterobics said: "Mike Barrett said: "Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior."

The whole thing sounds a bit shaky, though. For them to blame the victim, they would have to believe there is a victim, which is where the disconnect is..."

THIS, is my entire point. Thank you for being able to get this across more clearly than I have been able to.


The point is you do not see a victim. You don’t condone his behavior, sure, but you also are not seeing a victim in this scenario and that is the problem. That’s why I assume you condone this behavior, because anyone who doesn’t expect this to happen is “deluded and needs a reality check”, according to you.

Impossible, you seriously need a reality check. There’s a victim when things like sending an unwanted picture of yourself to others happens, illegal or not. That is the problem here and it’s one you clearly do not understand and have no intention of fixing, and have no sympathy for. It’s good to know. I stand by everything I’ve said."

Last post.

I never blamed or shamed anyone, I said I thought she was naive for trusting a guy she didn'treally know take nude photos of her. But I am not blaming or shaming her I just think anyone who allows themselves to be taken advantage of like that is silly for putting themselves in that position.Why did he need to to take nude photos of her? Why did he need them?What was he going to do with these photos? I don't get it. I don't get why he wanted to take them and I don't understand why she let him take them. Why did he have a stash of photos from all these women he had slept with and why did they also allow him to take them. I do not understand any of it.

All I know is that if the photos did not exist in the first place, none of this would've happened, so if there is a crime here, they both have a share in the blame. That is not blaming her I am blaming both of them for the photos existing. I also have empathy for her, I imagine she felt extremely betrayed, degraded and hurt by him sharing them and once again for the 50th time (even though you won't read it) he is 100% to blame for sharing them andisa douchebag for doing so."

Well, you contradicted yourself in that paragraph by saying they’re both to blame if there’s a crime here, and nothing would’ve happened she never allowed the photo to be taken, then he’s the only one to blame for sharing them. So which is it? 

This is the entire point your missing. You’re still blaming her and the other women for taking the pictures. You flat out said “I don’t get it”. Then said none of this would’ve happened if the women never allowed the photos taken. Then proceed to blame the both of them for having the photo in the first place, but it’s only his fault for sharing them. So again, which is it?
 

You just keep going back and forth lol I don’t understand how hard it is for you to not say that someone who takes a picture, shares it with someone they trust not expecting them to be shared, them that picture is shared, is NOT to blame, AT ALL!!! You can’t get past that, as I’ve pointed out. I’ve read every word you’ve posted and you continuously co blame the victims and the women who parktaked in the photos. You can’t say “None of this would’ve happened if they didn’t take the photo” then say “But I’m not blaming them”, because you just did! 
 

clealry not getting anywhere here, this is also my last post on the matter. 

[Sutton Ross]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:26pm

Normal people know that even when you take photos, it is respectful to keep pictures of private acts between the private parties involved in those acts. Only disordered personalities "share" private photos like trading cards, erasing their sexual partner as if she doesn't exist, or is just another piece of meat. One does not share private sexual activity without the permission of ALL people in the photo. In most states, what Mr. Ramasar did was highly illegal. And no, the taking of explicit photos DOES NOT give the person who takes them permission to "share" them. That's why photographers have their models sign releases.

This is an incredibly divisive topic and issue, obviously. But, does everyone agree that Chase Finlay is a predator who should never be allowed near another dance company again? I hope so. 

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:29pm

Sutton Ross said: "In most states, what Mr. Ramasar did was highly illegal."

It's illegal in zero states. We played this game a couple of months ago. I can dig up the receipts if need be.

[Highland Guy]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:33pm

Sutton Ross said: "This is an incredibly divisive topic and issue, obviously. But, does everyone agree that Chase Finlay is a predator who should never be allowed near another dance company again?."

 

NO

 

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:42pm

Mike Barrett said: "Impossible2 said: "Mike Barrett said: "haterobics said: "Mike Barrett said: "Haterobics, I may have misspoken just a little. They don't condone him, but they are still blaming the victim in this case which essentially normalizes this actors egregious behavior."

The whole thing sounds a bit shaky, though. For them to blame the victim, they would have to believe there is a victim, which is where the disconnect is..."

THIS, is my entire point. Thank you for being able to get this across more clearly than I have been able to.


The point is you do not see a victim. You don’t condone his behavior, sure, but you also are not seeing a victim in this scenario and that is the problem. That’s why I assume you condone this behavior, because anyone who doesn’t expect this to happen is “deluded and needs a reality check”, according to you.

Impossible, you seriously need a reality check. There’s a victim when things like sending an unwanted picture of yourself to others happens, illegal or not. That is the problem here and it’s one you clearly do not understand and have no intention of fixing, and have no sympathy for. It’s good to know. I stand by everything I’ve said."

Last post.

I never blamed or shamed anyone, I said I thought she was naive for trusting a guy she didn'treally know take nude photos of her. But I am not blaming or shaming her I just think anyone who allows themselves to be taken advantage of like that is silly for putting themselves in that position.Why did he need to to take nude photos of her? Why did he need them?What was he going to do with these photos? I don't get it. I don't get why he wanted to take them and I don't understand why she let him take them. Why did he have a stash of photos from all these women he had slept with and why did they also allow him to take them. I do not understand any of it.

All I know is that if the photos did not exist in the first place, none of this would've happened, so if there is a crime here, they both have a share in the blame. That is not blaming her I am blaming both of them for the photos existing. I also have empathy for her, I imagine she felt extremely betrayed, degraded and hurt by him sharing them and once again for the 50th time (even though you won't read it) he is 100% to blame for sharing them andisa douchebag for doing so."

Well, you contradicted yourself in that paragraph by saying they’re both to blame if there’s a crime here, and nothing would’ve happened she never allowed the photo to be taken,then he’s the only one to blame for sharing them. So which is it?

This is the entire point your missing. You’re still blaming her and the other women for taking thepictures. You flat out said “I don’t get it”. Then said none of this would’ve happened if the women never allowed the photos taken. Thenproceed to blame the both of them for having the photo in the first place, but it’s only his fault for sharing them. So again, which is it?


You just keep going back and forth lol I don’t understand how hard it is for you to not say that someone who takes a picture, shares it with someone they trust not expecting them to be shared, them that picture is shared, is NOT to blame, AT ALL!!! You can’t get past that, as I’ve pointed out. I’ve read every word you’ve posted and you continuously co blame the victims and the women who parktaked in the photos. You can’t say “None of this would’ve happened if they didn’t take the photo” then say “But I’m not blaming them”, because you just did!


clealry not getting anywhere here, this is also my last post on the matter."

So you basically just want an argument?

That portion of my opinion isn't going to change so I guess I'm a monster...

Updated On: 12/18/19 at 02:42 PM

[Impossible2]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:46pm

Sutton Ross said: "But, does everyone agree that Chase Finlay is a predator who should never be allowed near another dance company again? I hope so."

Yes...that I would agree with x

Posted: 12/18/19 at 2:48pm

Impossible2 said: "So you basically just want an argument?"

Seems that way.

For what it's worth, Amar's girlfriend didn't report him, sue him or otherwise do anything publicly to suggest she considers herself a victim at all. She declined to join Waterbury's suit so our only public signal is that she wants no part of this.

Arguing over what percentage of blame she assumes (100% blame? 0%? 18%?) misses the point that if she is not a victim, then there is no blame.

[Sutton Ross]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 3:17pm

She is a victim, that's not up for debate. If someone sends out nude photographs of another person without their consent, they can face criminal charges. Many states characterize this as revenge porn that can result in legal consequences. I think only about 38 states have those laws on the books since this time of crime is very new. Keep in mind that even if the victim originally gave the person consent to take the photographs, it becomes illegal when they are distributed without that person’s consent. Mr. Ramasar shared photos of several women without their consent. Again, he is named in this lawsuit for a reason. 

The lawsuit is going forward so obviously the judge thinks she has a case.

Posted: 12/18/19 at 3:23pm

Sutton Ross said: "Many states characterize this as revenge porn that can result in legal consequences. I think only about 38 states have those laws on the books since this time of crime is very new."

That's incorrect. Revenge porn laws require the sender to have the specific intent to cause harm to the victim (hence "revenge" ).

Sharing photos privately with friends for the purpose of excitement/titillation does not qualify under any of those states' laws.

Sutton Ross said: "Mr. Ramasar shared photos of several women without their consent."

This is also incorrect, according to pinoyidol2006, who is by far the most informed person regarding the lawsuit in this thread:

"When Finlay asked Ramasar for pictures, he sent topless photos of his girlfriend. Finlay asked for more, and Ramasar sent more nude photographs of the same woman. There's no indication in the lawsuit that Ramasar sent Finlay of other women in the company (paragraph 91)."

Updated On: 12/18/19 at 03:23 PM

[Sutton Ross]

Posted: 12/18/19 at 3:31pm

The most informed because they read a message board about ballet. Hmmm. I don't think so. 

You are misinformed, there are many laws in many states about exchanging nude photographs, it's illegal. No receipts necessary, thank you. Also, you didn't comment on the lawsuit going forward, meaning the judge found merit in her complaint. She is a victim, it's odd you don't concede that. Come January, we will see what happens. 

Posted: 12/18/19 at 3:42pm

Sutton Ross said: "The most informed because they read a message board about ballet. Hmmm. I don't think so."

I also linked directly to the complaint via the "Paragraph 91" cite. If you can show me where it says Ramasar sent photos of anyone other than the NYCB member, please do.

Sutton Ross said: "You are misinformed, there are many laws in many states about exchanging nude photographs, it's illegal."

Which states? Which laws?

Sutton Ross said: "Also, you didn't comment on the lawsuit going forward, meaning the judge found merit in her complaint. She is a victim, it's odd you don't concede that. Come January, we will see what happens."

I didn't comment on this because I didn't know what the hell you were talking about. The last 20-or-so messages have been about Amar's girlfriend (and her relative victimhood) - she is not the person that brought the suit. Amar's girlfriend is only referred to as "NYCB female member" in the suit, and has nothing to do with whether the suit moves forward or not.