The real last word belongs to the brilliant, brilliant writer Joe Keenan, who wrote clever witty novels with a gay protagonist long before he became a well-known television writer for Cheers and Frasier and Desperate Housewives.
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Joe Keenan
IN DEFENSE OF AARON SCHOCK : A POEM
Some news stories demand weighty and thoughtful essays. Others, like the saga of Aaron Schock, can only be addressed in light verse. Here’s my effort:
The folks who knock poor Aaron Schock
Are jealous, mean, and crabby!
They’ve made it clear this whole damn week
They hate the fact that Schock is chic,
And loathe the way his firm physique
Makes theirs look pale and flabby!
He’s done some things that even I’ll
Concede were slightly shabby.
But when he smiles his boyish smile
Who cares about the fiscal guile
That helped a smart young Anglophile
Redo his office in a style
His friends call “ Down-Low Abbey.”
Denounce the way he can’t refuse
Fine tailoring from Paris!
Revile his festive shirts and shoes!
His insta-grammed vacation views!
But I, for one, am sad to lose
A congressman who’s half Ted Cruz
And half Neil Patrick Harris!
Let mockers mock
But Aaron Schock
Is gracious in defeat;
For Aaron Schock
Has taken stock,
And tweeted one last tweet —
“It’s hard to face
Abrupt disgrace,
But still it’s kinda sweet
To realize
How many guys
Would love to fill my seat!”
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Updated On: 3/21/15 at 04:55 PM