I think many of us can relate to what you're going through on one level or another. And I'm really sorry that it's your turn to have had your heart broken by someone you trusted. There are those moments that come along where life as you know it changes permanently and that really sucks. Especially when you didn't see it coming.
I've no great words of wisdom other than to say that with a little help from our friends, it is usually possible to find the strength to rise to the occasion. There are lots of unexpected and unasked for things that get plopped on our plate that we didn't see coming. And we have no choice but to deal with them. We always have a choice in how we deal, but as it turns out, none of those choices may include what we really want.
Hang in there...and truly, I am sorry you are in so much pain.
Sueleen Gay: "Here you go, Bitch, now go make some fukcing lemonade." 10/28/10