Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic? — Page 2

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#26

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 12:36am

OS, alcoholism is a disease and is classified as such by the CDC.

Quoth the CDC:
Alcoholism or alcohol dependence is a diagnosable disease characterized by several factors including a strong craving for alcohol, continued use despite harm or personal injury, the inability to limit drinking, physical illness when drinking stops, and the need to increase the amount drunk in order to feel the effects

#27

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 12:37am

Many people drink simply because it is an escape from life.

It is a way to numb yourself to what is going on around you and to just hid where things are easy.

Like I said before, many people self-medicate through alcohol. Nervous before a party - have a drink. Unhappy, have a drink. Disappointed - have a drink. Rather than deal with the emotions and issues life presents them, they numb themselves to it all.

It is not too difficult a path to start down. I have seen enough people go down it and some never quite return.

#28

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 12:40am

I get what you meant by fear better now, DayDreamer.

There are different kinds. I've helped battered women and it is that kind of fear, their fear, their psyches shutting down living in so much daily fear that they are afraid to act, walking on eggshells, voices so soft you can hardly hear them, that I think of when the word is used.

#29

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 1:03am

"My dad drank himself out of a career, and it probably cost him at least 10 years of his life."

YouWantitWhen????, did you ever see Brideshead Revisited?

I'm reminded of Sebastian, who had such elan and style, yet went to alcoholism early on to the dismay of those who loved him.

Try as they did they found no way to stop him. When he disappears in the series you miss him and his absence haunts the rest of the episodes until he finally reappears in miserable straits.

#30

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 1:16am

No, I never watch that show too often.

My father was a top Nuclear Physicist who ruined his career by having lunch with the boys, and displacing his anger and depression in a bottle.

He really was a rocket scientist, and was involved in the early development of satellites for the US Space Program. In his prime, before he last too many brain cells, he was also the most brillant man I had ever met. We actually have a small prototype that we may send to the Smithsonian (if nothing else so my two sisters will stop trying lay claim to it.)

So yes, I have a very first-hand view of the perils of alcohol and the consequences when abused.

Which is why I am not willing to give Mel Gibson a free pass on what he said - being drunk often results in people meaning what they say.

#31

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 1:45am

I come from a history with the affliction. It doesn't excuse things, it only explains them.

Who you are is who you are - alcohol is only an accelerant. Anyone trying to claim otherwise is looking for excuses.

There are none. You have a problem, and you need help. End of discussion. The prevalent attitude of 'oh, you're ok you're just confused' is crap. You have a sickness - deal with it and get on with your life. And while you're at it, stop trying to blame others for the bullsh*t you have made of your life.

Mel hasn't said or done anything that isn't indicative of what and who he is. A homophobic anti-semite is that way whether drunk or sober. I'm just happy the truth is coming out.

#32

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 1:51am

Actually, this is a general question to see how people feel about alcoholism and the alcoholic.

I've observed different kinds of alcoholism. The one that seems most clear to me is the kind where someone just cannot put the bottle away and stop drinking. They "work" the bottle down (any kind of bottle, even if it is a cordial!) until it is gone like they are fixated on the bottle.

When I see that it's clear.

How do you recognize an alcoholic?

#33

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 1:53am

"How do you recognize an alcoholic?"

By looking in a mirror - how do you?

#34

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 2:54am

Actually DG, as I mentioned, the main way I've recognized that someone is an alcoholic is by realizing they are not stopping drinking until a bottle is empty.

#35

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 6:01am

I certainly have sympathy for alcoholics, and I wish I could see life through rosy colored glasses and believe most of them will recover and live normal lives, if they just applied themselves but my experience in my 47 years of life is that most of them never do recover. My father was a bad alcoholic when I was growing up and I use to dread the weekends because I knew what was about to happen. He also drank later in life but to a lesser extent. My brother suffered since he was a teenager with alcoholism, and this battle continued his entire life until he wound up dead on the street at age 49 with a bottle by his side. He was always in and out of drug treatment centers and when he wasnt drinking he had the nicest personalty and was a really smart guy. You'd think he had a great future ahead if he only applied himself. And he tried...over and over and over again. Nothing ever worked for him. This goes way beyond willpower or just doing the "right" things. Same thing goes for my two of my exs...both keeps relapsing, both couldnt hold a job..one of them wound up in big trouble with the law and finally died of aids no doubt as a result. I realize a percentage of alcoholics are able to maintain their sobriety, but in my experience, its a small percentage. Ive learned things arent so black and white in life...you can say the alcoholic should do certain things to change, but Im convinced some of them just arent capable of changing. Its most definitely a disease.

#36

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 8:13am

I do have some sympathy for the illness. I know a "functional alcoholic." Complete oblivious to the nature of the disease but the things this person does is pretty obviously connected to the craving for alcohol.
It's still frustrating to see the targets of the addiction and, worse, to be a target of it.

#37

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 8:24am

Re: is it a disease? Again, I'm putting alcoholism in the group of other compulsive behaviors such as overeating, gambling, shopping, etc. Yes, they are addictions, and the person involved is making their own decisions. The disease part comes in when that person is unable to make the right decision. It's a mental disease. While others know not to take the next drink, eat another plateful of food because it's not good for them, the compulsive person just can't stop. It's in the mind.

I also believe that there are a few people who can overcome their "disease" but it ain't easy~

<-----I'M TOTES ROLLING MY EYES

#38

re: Do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 10:27am

I have a co-worker who has been dry for over 15 years - he will not touch the stuff because he realize it takes over his life.

He is a wonderful, bright, thoughtful man who knows that he cannot win this fight, and therefore does not even try - Alcohol beat him once, and he will never again try to challenge the bottle again.

Luckily, he caught this before his life and career were destroyed.

You can beat it, but you have to be strong.

#39

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 10:49am

please allow me to introduce myself
i'm a man of stumbling slurs
i've been around for a long, long years
uttered many a vile and angry curse

i was 'round when jesus christ
had his story put on the screen
made damn sure that robertson
pledged support and showed some green

pleased to meet you
hope you guess my name
but what's puzzling you
is the nature of my game

i stuck around down malibu
when i saw it was a time for a change
built a church, found some ministers
the establishment screamed in vain

i rode a horse
showing no remorse
cut off english heads
but no jews of course

pleased to meet you
hope you guess my name, oh yeah
ah, what's puzzling you
is the nature of my game, oh yeah
(woo woo, woo woo)

r.i.p. marco, my guardian angel.

...global warming can manifest itself as heat, cool, precipitation, storms, drought, wind, or any other phenomenon, much like a shapeshifter. -- jim geraghty

pray to st. jude

i'm a sonic reducer

he was the gimmicky sort

fenchurch=mejusthavingfun=magwildwood=mmousefan=bkcollector=bradmajors=somethingtotalkabout: the fenchurch mpd collective

#40

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 10:51am

I know a "functional alcoholic."

It's not me, is it?

#41

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 10:55am

no, it's me, cal. and bway, i thought that was private...you hurt me, man, you hurt me bad.

#42

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 11:07am

I feel it to be a disease......and yes I am sympathetic, but that ends when I realize it's someone who knows they have a problem yet refuses to anything to end it, ie help themselves.

As youwant says, a person CAN beat it, however they know they are still an alcoholic.

It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story... AGATHA CHRISTIE, Life magazine, May 14, 1956

#43

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 11:39am

It's a difficult problem that definitely can be overcome, but the person in question has to realize it as a problem and want to change for them, not for someone else or because they're forced into it. I've seen way too many instances of the latter that always result in the person falling back into it, sometimes even more destructively. In some sense, experience with this in my family has sort of killed my idealistic view that everyone can change... some poeple can't or won't, and that's primarily because it's not what they want or they lack the force of will to make it happen. In some cases, I honestly think that the best thing to do is sever emotional ties rather than continuing to invest in someone who will never realize that the problem is theirs and not thw world's for not tolerating it.

Updated On: 8/1/06 at 11:39 AM

#44

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 12:33pm

You can't really 'beat' it... it's not something that you can get over, and be fine. It's truly a battle for the rest of your life. That's why alcoholics who stop drinking always say they are 'in recovery.' You're never truly cured.

Celebrate Life

Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted. - Randy Pausch

#45

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 12:39pm

oh, gosh, you guys. No. Calvin, you can knock 'em back (and lord knows I should have gotten off that train with you and made sure you got into your apartment!) but the functional alcoholic I'm talking about ALWAYS has a drink or just did or is just about to.

#46

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 1:00pm

FWIW my parents were pesent but absent and they didn't drink or use. Sometimes I wish they had because then the fallout would be easier to deal with. I could hate them outright and people would be more understanding about it.

#47

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 3:52pm

I am a recovering alcoholic after losing nearly 32 years. Some consider it an illness, others a choice, some an affliction...but I call it an allergy. I CAN NOT DRINK...NOT EVEN ONE DRINK! If I drink one drink, then I'll drink them all because once the first is inbibed, the rest can't be stopped.

It's a genetic thing, but it's ALSO a choice.

I slept through Les Mis, Company, Showboat, Pippin, and a few others over the years. What a waste and I thank God each day that I remain sober.

#48

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 6:34pm

...and she knows about overeating

#49

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 6:37pm

kudos to you, once a month!

It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story... AGATHA CHRISTIE, Life magazine, May 14, 1956

#50

do you have sympathy for the alcoholic?

Posted: 8/1/06 at 8:14pm

Yawper, I can relate to that - some years ago, my mother's best friend (since before I was born) suggested I read a book written for children of alcoholics. Everything in that book was familiar to me - and my mother doesn't drink other than the occasional social glass of wine.

There is no way to explain that to people.

Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson

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