Forget abortion, what about Noah?- Page 2

[Roscoe]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 11:46am

It only feels like Arthur's been around 900 years, Reg. It feels like Bush has been President for a lot longer.

[StockardFan]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 11:51am

Well if it's a sin to eat shrimp, then I'm going to hell for sure.

And, no to Noah.

[lildogs]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 11:59am

No to Noah, duh...

LOL to the Arthur Laurents zinger..

And Sherry, honey, you can't REALLY think that, can you?

[Jane2]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:02pm

Don't forget, lildogs-she doesn't know if the world is round and can't be bothered to think about it.

[MrMidwest]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:10pm

Can you blame her? She has kids to feed!

[Auggie27]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:15pm

Ah, Sherri. Always reminds me of MM in ALL ABOUT EVE.

"What if somebody's name is Butler?"

[Roscoe]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:18pm

Does it seem probable that the answers to the riddles of creation would be supplied by people too ignorant to understand the mechanics of rainfall?

Had Almight God, in all His infinite wisdom, really been afraid that men six thousand years ago would succeed in building a tower to heaven?

paraphrased from Joseph Heller's CATCH-22, you get the idea...

[Jon]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:23pm

You can believe the Noah story if you remember this:

"The entire world" meant an area around the size of New Jersey. A flood covering the entire earth meant "as far as the eye could see and/or as far as anyone had ever traveled".

"Two of every living creature" meant "two of every animal that lives in the area". Therefore, there would not be any penguins, kangaroos, koalas, elephants, tigers, etc. These animals are not native to area where Noah suppoosedly lived.

[Calvin]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:24pm

Phyllis, here is how the creationists explain the age thing, or at least as I recall it:

Pre-flood, or the antediluvian years if you will, the earth's atmosphere was surrounded by a layer of water called the firmament. This protected the inhabitants from solar radiation and such, so the aging process happened much slower and people lived longer. The great flood was not really rain -- there had been no such thing as rain, which is why the people were so incredulous of Noah's task -- but the falling of the firmament to the ground. Once the firmament was gone, people were then exposed to solar radiation, thus shortening the lifespan.

Given that there's no known planet out there in our vast universe surrounded by a big old layer of water, however, I'm going to have to cry bull hockey. So my vote is no.

Gilgamesh, though? Totally happened. Word for word.

Updated On: 10/1/08 at 12:24 PM

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:25pm

Calvin gets double points for the Gilgamesh line.

[Roscoe]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:40pm

Bill Hicks used to do a great routine about the Bible vs. dinosaurs. Believers used to tell him that God put fossils here deliberately to test our faith. He would act out God digging, saying "Now I'll see who believes in me!"

[lildogs]

Posted: 10/1/08 at 12:41pm

Didn't Gilgamesh crash Apu's wedding?

[broadwayjim42]

Posted: 10/2/08 at 1:56pm

No on Noah.

I look at the Bible as a mixture of history, philosophy and fable.

This counts as fable.

[Mother's Younger Brother]

Posted: 10/2/08 at 2:09pm

"Pre-flood, or the antediluvian years if you will, the earth's atmosphere was surrounded by a layer of water called the firmament. This protected the inhabitants from solar radiation and such, so the aging process happened much slower and people lived longer. The great flood was not really rain -- there had been no such thing as rain, which is why the people were so incredulous of Noah's task -- but the falling of the firmament to the ground. Once the firmament was gone, people were then exposed to solar radiation, thus shortening the lifespan."

Astounding that people will go out of their way to create these fantasies. I think this t-shirt says it best:

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 10/2/08 at 3:27pm

So does declaring Jesus Christ your personal lord and savior, you heathen!

[Jon]

Posted: 10/2/08 at 3:42pm

That was Ganesh at Apu's wedding.

Actually, it was Homer in an elephant mask.

[Calvin]

Posted: 10/2/08 at 4:35pm

MYB, when you invert the scientific method and spend your research trying to prove rather than disprove a theory, you can make anything seem true.

Example: A mathematical book I read recently showed me how I can prove Winston Churchill was a carrot.

[doodlenyc]

Posted: 10/2/08 at 4:49pm

I believe he was a parsnip.