*GOLDEN GIRLS* Favorite Line Thread

[Princeton78]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:36pm

Post your favorite one-liners from a show i'm sure *many* of us faithfully watch.

[ErikJ972]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:38pm

Blanche "You know the first thing I do after a party?"

Rose "Look for your underwear in the big pile?"

[Kitzarina]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:40pm

Rose: "It's like the old Scandanavian saying--you can lead a fish to water, but you have to walk pretty fast or he'll die."

[Patronus]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:40pm

Rose: Can I ask a dumb question?

Dorothy: Better than anyone I know.

[JailyardGuy]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:40pm

"So is interuterine, Rose."

[Princeton78]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:41pm

Rose: It's like life is one big weenie roast, and i'm the biggest weenie!

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:44pm

Forgive the paraphrasing, but in the episode when they are doing the community theatre show...

"Oh, I don't know, I thought she was very good in The Diary of Anne Frank."

"Oh, for Pete's sake Rose, she was awful! Why half way through the first act the audience was yelling, 'She in the ATTIC!'"

Updated On: 2/1/06 at 12:44 PM

[sweetestsiren]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:46pm

Anything that Dorothy ever said, but alas I don't have specific quotes.

[Patronus]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:49pm

Blanche: What was your first impression of me?

Rose: I thought you wore too much makeup and were a slut. I was wrong. You don't wear too much makeup.

[mominator]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 12:51pm

Any line that starts with "Well back in St. Olaf..."

[The Grovers Corners Yenta2]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 1:04pm

And any line that begins with " Picture this, Sicily..........."

[pengwendolyn]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 1:06pm

Whenever Stan goes "hey babe" and Dorothy glares at him and goes "don't call me babe". For some reason it always cracks me up.

[lildogs]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:15pm

Sueleen: Dorothy was speaking of Phyllis Hammerow, played by a great actress whose name escapes me, though she also played Jim's wife on Murphy Brown. It's the episode called The Actor--season 2.

I LOVE THESE THREADS!!!

Dorothy: As a child in the Depression, I had my wisdom teeth extracted by a shoemaker. That was more fun than this.

Sophia: I've lived through 2 world wars, 18 vendettas, and two Darrens on Bewitched.

And my fave:

Blanche: So I'm standing in Ladies Petite when this salesman comes all the way over from Mens Sports wear and sats "Excuse me, but I notice you've been having trouble chooing between the flaming red strapless and the turquoise backless. Personally, I'd like to see you in the backless." I said "When?" and he said "How bout Saturday night?" And I said "How bout in your dreams scum bag?" Can you believe the nerve of that guy?

Rose: What were you doing in Ladies Petite?

[Mother's Younger Brother]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:26pm

Priest: "You look lovely tonight."

Dorothy: "I look like the mother of a Solid Gold dancer."

[Apollo]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:27pm

Shore Leave.

[Anastasia_Beaverhausen]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:30pm

Blanche: Dorothy, you're outta the cluuuuub!

Dorothy: I've just been thrown out of an unauthorized elvis fan club. I'll try to pick up the pieces and go on with my life. I mean there must be a support group for people like me.

[Anastasia_Beaverhausen]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:33pm

Sophia to Dorothy: "Not as much as you hurt my uni."
Updated On: 2/1/06 at 02:33 PM

[SueleenGay]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:33pm

Thanks for the details, lildogs. I love that episode and never knew what season it was from.

[lildogs]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:41pm

Season Two is awesome--also includes my two fave episodes: Vacation and Isn't It Romantic, also known as The Shipwreck Episode "Shhh...I don't think we're allowed to talk while we work." and The Lesbian Episode "Yeah, if she finds out Danny Thomas is a lesbian, it'll break her heart."

[BroomstickBoy]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 2:44pm

Rose : Dorothy, if the Egyptians built the pyramids then we can move this toilet.

Dorothy : Fine, Rose, get me 20,000 Hebrews and I'll see what I can do.

(not sure if this is the exact wording)
Blanche : Girls, I am just beside myself, I have WRITER'S BLOCK, it is the worst feeling in the world.
Sophia : Try ten days without a bowel movement.
Blanche: You just SIT there hour after hour.....
Sophia : Tell me about it.



(Btw, Anastasia, who is that man in your avatar?)

[vbplayer]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 3:12pm

Blanche: I'm going to go take a long, hot, steamy bath with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms.

Sophia: You're only going to sit in an inch of water?!

[Becky2]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 3:38pm

Heh, I have a quote page website with a section dedicated to Golden Girls quotes. (If you want to see it the address is http://www.angelfire.com/music4/becky/quotes.html You have to scroll down a lot since I have a lot of my friends' quotes and Simpson's quotes as well.)

"All of Mile's co-workers at his party were college professors. I felt like a fish out of water... Sure I didn't flop around on the dance floor with my eyes bugging out, gasping for air. I haven't done that at a party in years!" - Rose

"When I was little I would get too excited and pet the cat too hard!" - Rose

"Why is it that blessing always come in disguise? If I were a blessing, I'd run around naked." - Sophia


"We even developed a secret weapon for WWII. *whispers* Attack cows. But it wasn't until they were airborne that we realized, a cow can't pull a ripcord! Well the expirement wasn't a total loss, if there's one thing the German's hate, it's a mess." - Rose

Blanche: Maybe you should join a club a little less fanatical in its devotion.
Dorothy: Like what Blanche, the PLO?

Blanche: I'm wound up tighter than a girdle on a Baptist minister's wife at an all-you-can-eat pancake breakfast.

Sophia: Dorothy have you seen my teeth?
Dorothy: They're in your mouth, Ma.
Sophia: I know that. Don't they look good today. I ran them through the dishwasher.

Sophia: I am not incompetent! Once, I laughed too hard, I had a little accident.

Rose: Oh, Blanche your not a terrible person. You're just horny all the time.

Dorothy: Oh back off Blanche! Not all of us are classified by the navy as a friendly port!

Sophia: I never have that problem, never. I sleep like a log. I never get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I go in the morning. Every morning like clockwork at 7 A.M. I pee. Unfortunately, I don't wake up til 8.

Sophia: There's just something I don't like about him. I can't put my finger on it, but if I did, I'd have to wash it.

Rose: My cousin Ingmar was different. He used to do bird imitations.
Blanche: What's wrong with that?
Rose: Well, let's just say, you didn't want to park your car under their oak tree.


•
Blanche: Rose is a bimbo.
Counselor: Rose, how do you feel about Blanche calling you that?
Rose: I think she's a garkögernøckin.
Counselor: What does that mean?
Rose: Well, it used to be the term for the precise second that dog doo turns white, but now it mainly stands for rude.

Blanche: Now look, Dorothy, I'm worried too. Sophia's like a mother to me, if we don't find her, I don't know how I'll respond. But I'd like to think I'm not gonna be any less sexy.
Dorothy: You're just a great big pile of estrogen, aren't you?

*Repeating Sophia* "Anger is like a piece of shredded wheat...?" - Dorothy

"Sticks and stones can break your bones, but cement pays homage to tradition." - Sophia

And our next contestant, from St. Olaf, was voted most likely to get stuck in a tuba: Rose Nylund."

"Blanche, I don't think you realize how powerful sex is. Once, Charlie and I actually did it 'til the cows came home. Of course I was wearing a bell." - Rose

"I think you should sleep with him." - Blanche

"No she doesn't!" - Dorothy
"Dorothy, the man came at her with a hose!" - Rose

Rose told Dorothy that Blanche's brother Clayton is hiding he's gay]
Sophia: Why won't you tell me, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Because it's none of your business, Ma.
Sophia: Fine. But you can't keep a secret from Sophia Petrillo. Whatever it is, I can find it out with a few quick questions.
Clayton [walks into the kitchen]: Hello, ladies.
Sophia: So, Clayton, what do you think of this Miami weather so far?
Clayton: I think it's lovely.
Sophia: I see... Have you ever been to Europe?
Clayton: No, but it's always been a dream of mine.
Sophia: Okay... How many fingers am I holding up?
Clayton: Two.
Sophia: Okay, you can go in the living room now.
[After Clayton left the kitchen]
Sophia: The man is as gay as a picnic basket!
Dorothy: Ma, that's incredible! How did you know?
Sophia: I heard him singing in the shower. He's the only man who knows all the words to 'Send in the Clowns'.

[lildogs]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 3:44pm

Dorothy: Creamed what was left on his pants?!

[cserannie]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 4:07pm

first episode, Sophia arrives from the Home.

Dorothy: Mother, sit down you must be very tired.
Sophia: I was sitting in a taxi, I didn't push it to come here.
(Sorry if it's not correct, I saw the dubbed version).

[lildogs]

Posted: 2/1/06 at 5:23pm

Sophia: Dorothy, jealousy is an ugly thing. And so are you in anything backless.