Jews and Homos...

First of all, I am not Jewish, so I am asking this sincerely. I have noticed there is a sort of desperation in people of the Jewish faith to get married and have children. I know people who join Jewish dating services and Yenta’s thread about her friends finding true love in a Jewish singles chat room made me wonder about this. Is there more pressure in the Jewish community to find someone, no matter who it is, marry them and start a family than in other religions?
I know this one young man, who is very into theatre, composes music, hangs around and is best friends with many gay people who all think he is gay, too. He denies it, professes to be straight on any occasion he is allowed to speak and claims he is waiting for the right girl…yes, he is very religious…

Is the Jewish faith so against Homosexuality that these young people are being made to believe that if they are not married with children they are worthless?

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Is there a religion that doesn't teach that if you aren't married with children you are worthless?

Growing up Catholic, I saw many many gay men who either married and had children or became priests. In fact, I used to think that "Has a calling" was a euphemism for gay as my aunt would always speculate about the young gayboys who weren't interested in dating that "Perhaps he has a calling!" (Meaning he is called by God to be a priest)

Is there a religion that doesn't teach that if you aren't married with children you are worthless?

I think that has more to do with culture than religion.

Sueleen,
Here is my impression about Jewish single groups..and why it seems to standout.
Jews like to date within their religion. You will see ads for Jewdate, because they only want to date each other, as opposed to Match.com, which is more of an open source for finding the perfect someone without limitations.
(Besides..Jews like to segregate themselves in a lot of ways - not all Jews - but many Jewish communities do)
Jews, like many Asians, believe in tradition.
Fiddler explains perfectly how Jews think in terms of breaking tradition. Because if they break it, then the world spins completely off its axis...

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Updated On: 7/7/05 at 12:11 PM

That makes sense, Justice, thanks. However...

MEF, what would they have done if you were a woman? Is it worse to be involved with a non-Jewish person or a person of the same gender?

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MEF,
Yes...Jewish families can be very cold to those not of the faith...especially to one dating their daughter.

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Thanks, PJ. Like I said, I am not Jewish so I admit my ignorance in the matter.

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"(Besides..Jews like to segregate themselves in a lot of ways - not all Jews - but many Jewish communities do)"

I don't think that's true at face value.

What I do think is "going on" is that those of the jewish faith are in a minority. Many want to find someone within their faith because of tradition and also because, genuinely - there's a common bond in both culture and that tradition. Since Judiasm is a minority, the odds are that much less when going out and meeting people (unless you are at a jewish function) - hence the concentration in jewish dating sites.

Keep in mind that these sites and events are all over the country. So while NYC might have a decent population of jewish singles, that's not the case all over the US (or world).

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All I know is that I have had several Jewish partners and boyfriends and that ALL of them couldn't wait to get into my Southern Irish Catholic tighty whities.

We like baptists a lot--they're crazy. We like latin men even more.

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Well, come on, who doesn't like Latinos!
But back to the subject...

MEF, is it fair then to say that Jewish people as a whole have a bigger problem with Homosexuality than other religions and thus young Jewish men who are really gay are under more pressure to stay in the closet and deny thier true selves just to stay in good graces with the family?

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Let's not lump all Jews into one characterization. Just because some Jewish families cut off contact with an "out" brother or sister doesn't mean that such intolerance is being taught as part of the religion.

I've found the Jewish religion to be extremely liberal on many issues. There is always going to be extremism naturally.

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"Let's not lump all Jews into one characterization."
That is exactly why I was asking to begin with, baddadnpa. I knew that my original question could be read as a generalization, and that is not what I intended. I really was curious, for the sake of my closeted Jewish buddy. Thanks for all the info...

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