we talked about this issue a lot in class this past year and read many articles by all different people including rabbis, homosexual jews, etc.
as people, just like in every religion, beliefs will vary from individual to individual and from temple to temple so you can't generalize as people have said. many orthodox families probably would excommunicate a family member if they found out the family member was gay, just like they would excommunicate a family member that married a non-jew.
in conservative judaism, JTS (the jewish theological seminary in nyc, which ordains most conservative rabbis in the US) has a "don't ask don't tell" policy, where they won't admit someone if they know the person's gay while applying, but once the person is in the school and comes out, i'm pretty sure they won't be kicked out for it. it's a really big issue on the campus at the moment and within conservative judaism and at the recent graduation/ordination, there was a group giving out pins that had a rainbow background and said "ordination regaurdless of orientation." the CJLS (the committee on jewish law and standards) which determines the conservative movement's modern law in the US says that gay people cannot be rabbis or leaders within the community but that they should be welcomed as part of the community and should not be discriminated against. (just a little hypocritical, i know) also, conservative rabbis belong to the RA (rabbinical assembly) and there are three ways to be kicked out of it, one of which being marrying a same-sex couple. you can't be kicked out of the RA for being gay though. basically, conservative is open to it but not completely accepting yet, only because anal sex (and only anal sex, not being gay or anything else) is prohibited in the torah and most people are not yet ready to either abbrogate the law in the torah or to accept people as leaders that violate the law. i don't really know much about reform.
sorry if that was more than you wanted to know but i hope it helps a little. that's the official policy as far as i know and if you want more information or articles i have a bunch i can send to you.
(you should know that i don't necessarily agree with all of this. it's just the official stance at the moment, but it will probably change within the coming years. for my class, i actually wrote a paper saying that gay people should be allowed to be jewish leaders using jewish texts as proof.)
No Child: http://www.epictheatrectr.org/
I Love You Because OCR: http://www.psclassics.com/cd_iloveyou.html