Porked Up

[Jim Colyer]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 7:52pm

When we got together
She was a slender thing
So slim and trim
She made me sing

She started to change
When the baby came
She started to eat
Started to gain

Porked Up
Like Miranda Lambert
Porked Up
Like Hillary Scott
Porked Up
Like Linda Ronstadt
Porked Up
Like Mama Cass

Porked Up
Like Wynonna
Porked Up
Like Sally Struthers
Porked Up
Like Oprah
Porked Up
A real fat ass

She goes on a diet
Then shovels donuts down
She gains two pounds
For every pound lost

I posted my photo
At Match.com
I'm tired of sleeping
With a slob

Porked Up
Like Miranda Lambert
Porked Up
Like Hillary Scott
Porked Up
Like Linda Ronstadt
Porked Up
Like Mama Cass

Porked Up
Like Wynonna
Porked Up
Like Sally Struthers
Porked Up
Like Oprah
Porked Up
A real fat ass

Rap:
Porked Up
Like Jessica Simpson
Porked Up
Like Rosie O'Donnell
Porked Up
Like Mariah Carey
Porked Up
Like Kirstie Alley
Porked Up
Like Ann Wilson
Porked Up
Like Kelly Clarkson
Porked Up
Like Shelley Winters
Porked Up
Like Tyra Banks

Jim Colyer ascap



Nashville Girl Album

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 7:54pm

Bitch, Please.

[Marianne2]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 7:56pm

This is too easy...

[Wynbish]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 7:57pm

He's just dicking around now

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 9:18pm

"Porked Up
Like Sally Struthers"

Now I'm going to kick your ass.

[SNAFU]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 9:51pm

Why do the Mods allow him to post this ****?

[ljay889]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 9:53pm

YOUNG WOMEN - Jim Colyer
Originally posted by jimcolyer at YOUNG WOMEN - Jim Colyer
I prefer the company of young women. I've become aware of several young female celebrities on the web. The Little Big Town girls are my favorites. They are both 43.

1 KAREN FAIRCHILD is the brunette in LBT. She is married to Jimi in the group, and they have a young son.
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Karen-Fairchild/161476880542773

2 KIMBERLY SCHLAPMAN is the curly-haired blonde in LBT. She is married and has a daughter.
http://www.gactv.com/gac/shows_gckim/

3 BRIDGET REGAN IS 31. She starred in a TV series called "Legend of the Seeker." She gets my vote to be the next Wonder Woman.
http://herblueeyes.com/

4 TAYLOR COLE is a 29-year-old beauty from Arlington, Texas. She will be the "other woman" in the forthcoming movie, "The Minister's Wife."
http://taylorqcole.com/

5 JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT is the darling of the talk shows. At 34, she is pregnant. She currently stars in "The Client List."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3AGz6LNtzg

6 ADRIANNE PALICKI did a Wonder Woman pilot. Despite being beautiful and sexy, she does not quite have the "Wonder Woman look."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adrianne_Palicki

7 NATALIE GLEBOVA is Russian-born. Immigrating to Canada with her parents, she became Miss Universe 2005. She is stunning in a swimsuit!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-kR9GQANok


http://jimcolyer.livejournal.com

Updated On: 8/14/13 at 09:53 PM

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:06pm

That makes me want to vomit.

How long until the cops find the bodies under his house?

[strummergirl]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:28pm

From those glamor shots we caught of you Jim Colyer, White Supremacist, I'd say this is pot meeting kettle but all of those ladies actually have a soul.

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:35pm

Who will play Jim Colyer, White Supremecist Racist Dack Of Dog SH*T in the Lifetime movie when the cops dog up the bodies of all the women he's buried under his house?

I'm guessing it'll be someone like Larry The Cable Guy. But uglier. And pastier.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:36pm

And fatter.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:37pm

Wouldn't it be kicky if Jim Colyer was Stormy Sue?

[romantico]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:37pm

This man should not be criticizing ANYONE over their looks.



Please,feel free to comment on his youtube page.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSGW0eOSlVU

Updated On: 8/14/13 at 10:37 PM

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 10:38pm

Don't insult the racist like that.

[Marianne2]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 11:12pm

I feel like I need to take another shower after reading this again. So gross.

[SNAFU]

Posted: 8/14/13 at 11:31pm

I wouldn't normaly say something about a person's looks. However since many of this douche's songs are about woman and their looks, I have to say after seeing that Youtube video, he looks like a turtle!

[Kad]

Posted: 8/15/13 at 12:41am

This is probably the worst one he's posted.