Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

#1

Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 7:49pm

"Because it's nasty!"
- Given due to a refusal to support gay marriage

Updated On: 12/21/05 at 07:49 PM

#2

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 7:50pm

"I can't, I have cystic fibrosis today"
-JailyardGuy to someone he met at a bar the night before who was way cuter after 8 martinis.

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Suzanne: I never use catalogs. I'd rather go in the store and see all the salespeople groveling and sucking up to you. Julia: Pardon me, I never knew they were so solicitous at the K-Mart.

#3

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 7:51pm

JG, you are like certain episodes of South Park to me.

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Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson

#4

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 7:51pm

I like the one with Babzilla.

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Suzanne: I never use catalogs. I'd rather go in the store and see all the salespeople groveling and sucking up to you. Julia: Pardon me, I never knew they were so solicitous at the K-Mart.

#5

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 7:52pm

I'm at that place in my life right now...

#6

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 7:53pm

My teachers refuse to except that "I was watching Greg cam all night" as an excuse to not do homework... even though it's quite valid...

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Mary
Bob Martin Online

#7

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:01pm

Luckily for me on Wednesdays I have seminar so I can watch it without feeling guilty.

Aww..how cute.. he's putting on his eyeliner!

Updated On: 12/21/05 at 08:01 PM

#8

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:05pm

My father wouldn't come to my wedding in Connecticut because it is too hot here in July. He lived in Florida.

#9

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:06pm

Called in on a Tuesday:

"I think I am going to be sick on Thursday night."

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"You just can't win. Ever. Look at the bright side, at least you are not stuck in First Wives Club: The Musical. That would really suck. " --Sueleen Gay

#10

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:07pm

"You're just being sensitive/dramatic" when someone says something hurtful.

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Am I cut out to spend my time this way?

#11

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:11pm

I'd like to kiss ya but I just washed my hair.

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" ...the happiness in the tune convinces me that I'm not afraid."

#12

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:13pm

I can't go the to the movie - I have to go home and feed my dog.

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~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I remember days
Or at least I try
But as years go by
They're sort of haze
And the bluest ink
Isn't really sky
And at times I think
I would gladly die
For a day of sky
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
And Starbucks will use the words 'large' and 'small', not pretentious crap like grande and tall.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"You could get away with anything if you call it art and tell people who don't like it that it's cutting edge culture." --vmlinnie
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

#13

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:35pm

when catching someone I was dating sucking face with someone else in a bar, he said "he's just a friend from my college days that I lost touch with"....

it looked like they were having NO problem regaining touch.....

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It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story... AGATHA CHRISTIE, Life magazine, May 14, 1956

#14

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 8:55pm

I would love to hook up with you, but you look like my cousin, and that would be weird.

--my new favorite let down line

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"Fundamentalism means never having to say 'I'm wrong.'" -- unknown

#15

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 9:54pm

touchme, I love that one........

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It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story... AGATHA CHRISTIE, Life magazine, May 14, 1956

#16

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/21/05 at 11:16pm

"...It was only a murder"


This was shown on the news which a murderer was being interviewed .
He meant it as: 'he only killed 1 person and not many' (The Holocaust)

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"How bout a little black dress?"~hannahshule "I have a penis, not a vagina." ~munkustrap178

#17

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/22/05 at 12:08am

"It's only a message board."

#18

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/22/05 at 12:31am

"I have to quit the message board because I have been identified by the personal comments I made about my life for all the world to read....I have to quit the messasge board because I have been identified by the personal comments I made about my life for all the world to read....Oh? You love me?...Oh? You won't let me leave?...OK, I am not leaving but I have to change my name because I have been identified by the pesonal comments I made made about my life for all the world to read...So my new name is XX...I will stop posting personal comments for all the world to read...Thank you secret poster for showing my sister a terrific time in New York City on her recent visit."

#19

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/22/05 at 12:38am

Eadie - very clever. Inaccurate, but clever.

#20

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/22/05 at 12:43am

"I haven't had time to practice my French horn because I'm pregnant."
-Insane habitual liar in my sixth grade class to my band director.

"I'm not pregnant anymore. I lost the baby when I tripped over a piano."
-Same habitual liar weeks later, when asked about the baby.

#21

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/22/05 at 5:59am

These are great!

Must use them in the future! Expecially the Cystic Fibrosis and Pregnant lines...

#22

re: Stupidest Excuse You've Ever Heard Someone Give?

Posted: 12/22/05 at 6:39am

"What, are you PMSing or something?"

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"A little humility wouldn't hurt." --Ellie, Constantine-Hellblazer, "Dangerous Habits"