Upcoming Movie Remakes...now with even more BLASPHEMY!

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 12:23pm

From Nerve.com:

"This is so retarded. They’re remaking Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds, but now they’ve given the birds a reason why they’re attacking.

“In the original, the birds just showed up, and it was kind of like, why are the birds here? This time, there’s a reason why they’re here and (people) have had something to do with it. There’s an environmental slant to what could create nature fighting back.”

Which, of course, completely f**king lays waste to the genius of Hitchcock’s concept. I mean, not even The Birds II: Land’s End was dumb enough to give them a reason."

Oh and boring-ass Kate Beckinsale is in talks for a BARBARELLA remake, hacky Tony Scott is remaking THE WARRIORS and setting it in L.A.(!!), and of course there are more John Carpenter remakes: ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK and HALLOWEEN. When does it end?

[Roscoe]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 12:32pm

It would end if people stopped paying money to see them or buy them on DVD.

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 12:36pm

There is no indication that movie remakes are proven box office gold. Its just a dearth of imagination.

[ClumsyDude15]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 12:56pm

Their remaking ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING with Raven, apparently.

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 1:36pm

So, what's their reason?

It's my beach, b*tch! Get the f*ck off!

[SorryGrateful]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 1:58pm

That's awesome, ABS. You've made my crappy day less crappified.

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:00pm

That's what I'm here for :)

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:01pm

The scariest element of The Birds was that there was no reason the birds suddenly arrived and no end in sight. If we understand why they are there, then there is a possibility we know how to make them go away, which allows the audience to predict a termination of the conflict, weakening the suspense. The Birds was like literally watching a nightmare, where events are happening with no rational explanation and no sign of relief, creating an atmosphere of eternal Hell. Stephen King wrote a brilliant story using the same device called, "The Mist".

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:03pm

I'll never forget seeing THE BIRDS at the Castro Theater.

I didn't care for Ms Tippi, but that's another thread.

[pemberlee]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:04pm

Ugh, Raven should be part of this disastrous remaking of The Birds and leave my precious Adventures in Babysitting alone. How can a teeny-boppin' Disney princess be in a movie that involves adultery, prostitutes, centerfold lookalikes, underage drinking, and the classic line, "Don't bleep with the babysitter" ?

[Dark_Angel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:05pm

I'm just thinking remaking anything done by Hitchcock is redundant. But I guess when even a modern day horror classic like PSYCHO didn't escape the remake syndrome then nothing is sacred.

What's up next? A remake of WEST SIDE STORY, perhaps. While they're at it why don't they just go ahead and remake THE SOUND OF MUSIC too.
Updated On: 4/20/07 at 02:05 PM

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:06pm

"How can a teeny-boppin' Disney princess be in a movie that involves adultery, prostitutes, centerfold lookalikes, underage drinking, and the classic line, "Don't bleep with the babysitter"

She probably won't. I'm sure the script's been washed out like a whore on Saturday night.

[Dark_Angel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:06pm

ABSteel that was f+cking priceless

[SorryGrateful]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:07pm

I love that story, Mister Matt! There are a few vague mentions of some nuclear experiments going on in a town not too far away, but mostly the story is just, "How do we stay alive?" and, "What do we do next?" Stephen King is highly underrated.

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:08pm

I'll have to check out "The Mist" now.

Last I checked, King was anything but underrated.

[ErikJ972]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:13pm

I love "The Mist". It's actually being made into a movie that looks like it's going to be pretty good. Frank Darabont (Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile) is directing.

[SorryGrateful]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:16pm

I mean underrated in that he's so often not considered a "serious" writer, just a horror writer. I consider that very untrue. Look at his latest, Lisey's Story. What a beautiful book. OK, sorry, threadjack over.

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:16pm

Oooh... I love THE GREEN MILE.

[Borstalboy]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:17pm

And, coming full circle, THE MIST when I read it, reminded me a lot of THE BIRDS!

[SorryGrateful]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:18pm

Woo hoo! Way to be on topic!

[Magdalene]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 2:43pm

Is Howard Stern still planning to remake Porky's?

[JohnPopa]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 3:39pm

I'm not sure how rights in Hollywood work but it seems weird that most everything John Carpenter did is suddenly being considered for a remake (including The Thing.) Did his rights lapse or did he sell everything off or something? Any Hollywood insiders know?

[ABSteel]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 3:41pm

Even though he's the director, all films are owned by the company that made them. So if the company wants to remake it, they can remake it, even if he doesn't want them to.

[worrell4077]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 10:06pm

There are actually decent remakes, I can't really think of any that comes to mind, but there are some out there, but for the most part all remakes are really terrible, Gus Van Sant's remake of Psycho was just not needed, seeing that it was shot frame by frame, scene for scene as the original Hitchcock.

Remakes are sometimes good for fans of the original movies to see maybe a different take on the characters portrayed in the film like how Chris Nolan is going to have a "remake" of The Joker that's going to be a completely different take on Nicholson's Joker along with a different take on Harvey Dent/Two-Face that will be completely different from Billy Dee Williams's Dent and Tommy Lee Jones's Two-Face.

When you honestly think about all the properties that are being remade or characters that are being revisted, you really do got to wonder if they truly need to be made like The Hills Have Eyes remake and it's sequel really didn't need to be made.

I have to also say, I hate the fact they are going to state a motive as to why the birds attack in The Birds. Why do that? It makes it more scary to just have birds attack then to dig deep and wonder why.

[B3TA07]

Posted: 4/20/07 at 10:07pm

This whole Birds fiasco has LIBERAL AGENDA written all over it.