What Do You Guys Think? (adult/minor relationship)

I am curious what you guys think on here.

Is it completely wrong for a mature teen male to have a relationship with a man in his 20's? I know, its illegal. But if the man treats him right - do you think it's okay? Do you think if there is really something there - it's worth the risk?

I am not saying I'm in a relationship like this. But I just want to know what you think about this.

it is not worth going to jail for.
If there is something there, it will STILL be there when the teen is legal.

Having said that, I do feel the adult needs to possibly look into why he feels the need for a relationship with someone not an adult.

Be specific.....what age is the "mature teen male".

A 21 yr-old with a 17 yr old, is MUCH different than a 21yr old with a 15yr old....

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I don't feel like giving away too many details. But trust me when I say I am not in a relationship like this right now. I don't want everyone too think I am.

Oh, and I am the teen male - if you didn't know lol. I'm not the man.

But just to get a little from a really hot man. Is it wrong? Will it leave me hurt (emotionally)?

Updated On: 7/18/05 at 07:26 PM

Hmmm. I appreciate the responses. Because I have some thinking too do.

Not to mention that there is a witchhunt on now for "child molesters" so depending on the age of consent in your state, this could be a crime.

Being a straight female, I don't know how much help I can provide. Personally, I think that age is a number, but obviously within a LOT of logical reason. Though it happens, it doesn't make much sense to me what someone in their twenties would want with someone who is say... fifteen. Though as you get older, I think age differences matter less and less, as that age, it almost seems silly - what's going to come of it? Probably not a serious relationship.

But, if both of you truly are in it just to get some, and you are thoroughly convinced that that's what you're looking for, then maybe it's not such a terrible thing - again, depending on what exactly the age difference is, and how safe you actually do feel. A lot of this is so dependent on the specific situation, for obvious reasons. But with your question the potential to be hurt emotionally, you hit on something really important. I think emotional attachment can come and bite you in the ass at really inopportune times, but it's such a personal thing. Some people can have involvement and simply turn off their emotions, and some people develop and keep emotional attachments. Granted, physical acts like what seem to be being implied here ARE inherently emotional, and I think they have to be handled carefully. Say you start out just wanting to "get a little," but you were to end up falling for this guy, though he was still just looking to get some. You could end up hurt. But, you could end up hurt in any relationship, I guess. I suppose that just because with an age difference over such a gap of maturity, being that one person in question is a teenager, with people in two very different stages of life, it might be much easier to get hurt.

Honestly, though, you need to do what you feel comfortable with.

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this is something i have been thinking about lately, not because of myself, but because of a family member i am worried about.
please be careful you don't get hurt and really think things through.

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I think before you consider having sex with anyone!, perhaps you can try and figure out when to use the preposition "to" and when to use the adverb "too."

Updated On: 7/18/05 at 07:38 PM

Now, now, Chita

Michael--The idea of friendship/mentoring is wonderful! have a close friend who disagrees with me, and we have had heated discusssions about this. I am a college professor, and I have seen first-hand the destruction that can be wrought on young men and women. All relationships have a power balance, and it is rare for the teen to have that balance in his/her favor. This is especially true when the "adult" is in any position of authority.

If you think this guy has relationship potential, than he shouldn't mind waiting a few more months to make it legal. You're 17, if you think you could be with this guy for awhile, a few more months of friendship can only help your relationship. If neither of you think you can wait until then, it probably isn't worth the risk of felony conviction.

However, depending on what state you're in, the age of consent varies and can be younger than 18.

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Don't get me wrong--I always dated older men, at least until I became one.
It's just the teenage thing that really bothers me.

u got me on that one???

LOL Chita--you are so right! Now, I'm happy with guys in their 40's.