sexuality as defining trait- Page 2

[Elphaba]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 2:01am

waves at Tiff, long time no see!

[wonderwaiter]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 2:01am

Now that Tiff brought it up, it's not like you didn't post some fantasy material right there, DG!

[DG]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 2:03am

I would never - I'm a good girl I am!

By the way - am I being exhibit A in proving Jason's point?

[Type_A_Tiff]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 2:27am

Why do the jeans have to be black?

Why does he have to be wearing jeans at all?

(Hello to Elphaba! *waves* You must get me caught up on Europe at some point! Are you still there?)


ETA: I just want to point out that we're not necessarily proving Jason's point right now - there's a difference between sexuality as a defining trait and depraved-and-repressed-horniness as a defining trait. Sadly, I think I'm proving to be the latter.

Updated On: 8/4/06 at 02:27 AM

[DG]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 2:33am

For Tiff.

[Type_A_Tiff]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 2:38am

Thanks, DG! What a powerful thread - I got shivers.

[Kringas]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 3:35am

Why do you 'mos always have to make it sexual? Jeesh!

[JailyardGuy]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 8:41am

Holy sh*t, it's Tiff!!!!!!

TIFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I miss you, you hot-bewbied vixen!

(Was that too sexual?)

Updated On: 8/4/06 at 08:41 AM

[Pip]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 9:34am

This is a very interesting topic and discussion. I agree with all the points that have been made; this is a relatively safe forum for gay banter and that's pretty rare. Since the question was raised by a straight guy trying to understand the perspective of a gay guy, I think we need to talk about the "defining trait" part. I am defined by society based on my sexuality. You are not. You are "as expected" and are much more free to be defined as just an athlete, or an activist, or a humorist. Because of my sexual orientation, though, society defines me as a GAY athlete, or a GAY activist, or a GAY humorist. My sexual orientation, as soon as it's known,is the filter through which society sees everything else that I am and do. Even your observation that started this thread draws attention to a gay filter. My perception, then, (and I can't see through your eyes any more than you can see through mine) is that you probably have been free to develop and define yourself as "you" not the "straight you" so you wonder why we're so hung up on our sexuality. I think it's a legitimate observation but it's because society has labeled it as our defining trait...and, in that context,it is. After all, the only real difference between us is what arouses us...and we're labeled accordingly.
Updated On: 8/4/06 at 09:34 AM

[YouWantitWhen????]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 9:42am

Damn, I actually was responsible last night and missed Tiff...

I just echo what Tiff and DG have said.

And, I do find it a bit of hope in WW story - years ago, I wonder if the reaction of the construction crew would be much different.

[jasonf]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 9:47am

I really do appreciated all the (ironically) straight answers I've gotten on here rather than the jabs and (ironically) flames I was expecting.

Pip and DG - I think both of you made some excellent points and hearing the honesty there is fascinating to me.

The ONE part of your post, Pip, that in a way is what led to the first post in the first place, was your last sentence: "After all, the only real difference between us is what arouses us...and we're labeled accordingly." I absolutely agree with that statement - though CLEARLY many people in the world don't. I've posted in other threads about why musicals are so affiliated with homosexuality, and your statement there really supports my point in that I have no idea WHY it does to the point that musicals are derided by many straight people as being a "gay" art form. Obviously I don't see it that way - and though there have been many gay musicals, I think that is in large part due to the large gay community who work in theater. Another question - is the association a result of those straight men not feeling musicals are "manly" enough and thus ceding the art form to the gay community, or did the art form get the "gay vibe" (I know that's a horrible phrase but I don't know what else to write) as a result of the gay community taking on the role of leaders in that community. Maybe it's a chicken or the egg thing...

[doodlenyc]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 10:13am

Since "locker room talk" was used to describe straight men behaving in this manner, I think it is safe to say that BWW is one of our locker rooms...a place where it feels alright to express ourselves.

Really interesting question, Jason.

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 10:27am

My own perspective is that the proliferation of innuendo in our community also comes from the dating/mating dance that we are forced to do. We have to "feel out" a guy that we are interested in. A heterosexual man can simply walk up to a girl and ask her out witout fear of recrimination or retribution. We have to first ascertain if he is "one of us" before we can act. A return of flirtation/innuendo is many, but not all, times our green light to proceed.

[RobbO]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 10:32am

"A return of flirtation/innuendo is many, but not all, times our green light to proceed."

that, and a big package.

[Pip]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 10:34am

Unforunately the big package isn't always attached to a green light...

[SonofMammaMiaSam]

Posted: 8/4/06 at 10:39am

Pip and/or RobbO can run my yellow light any time! Updated On: 8/4/06 at 10:39 AM