I saw the movie again tonight, for what I suspect will be the last time -- at least on the big screen. Over the past month and four days, I total five viewings. The chances I'll get to see it in a theatre again are very slim, so tonight was a reluctant, too-soon, yet very fond farewell.
I wanted to post this here for a couple of reasons, I guess, but the top of those being for my own personal archival, I suppose: now I can have my very first reaction, and my very last to the movie on the big screen all in one place. Closure, maybe. But either way, now this thread is something of a small full-circle.
I took with me tonight a lot of movie-related baggage from the past few weeks: all of the random funny things that aren't integral to the movie itself, that you'd never notice until someone pointed them out -- Wax Lion, Adam (who, by the way, I think I become more and more proud of each time) caught stuffing his face, which props have ended up on eBay, the fact that Roger wears designer sweatpants, etc. Silly bloopers.
And then I brought with me all of the frustration that's come with the nitpicking and the backlash -- now, watching the movie, I sit there and think about how I might refute the token argument of the day, and I think about how sad it is that Rent on screen didn't make the splash that it could've made -- the splash that it *should've* made. That will always break my heart, because of how much love went into this movie.
Yet, there are so, so many beautiful moments in a movie that I can best described as emotionally charged. And after a month of accumulating baggage and continued faith in the project, those moments bring me right back to where I was the first time. They still feel just like the first time, losing none of their poignancy. It felt no more real tonight than it did a month ago to see those names on a movie screen, or to see on screen things that were created right before my eyes.
I responded to this movie emotionally. And that's exactly how I wanted it.
So, with satisfaction, thus I end this chapter.

It feels complete. Or, as complete as it'll ever feel, I think. I love this movie for what it is. And that's not going to change, however heavy the baggage may be. I'm not ever going to experience something like this with a film ever again, so I only take away the good.
A work of art is an invitation to love.
Updated On: 12/17/05 at 11:50 PM