Mine was on one of those many BWW The Musical threads that got deleted... The song claims Wicked is closing, because the "musical" is set on the day Wicked closes, but other than that, it's fairly accurate. It goes like this:
"Everything Coming Up's Closing"
By Schmerg_The_Impaler
Spoken: Closing? I'm just starting, and there's nothing to stop me getting tickets this time!
Sung:
I have a plan
To see all these shows, baby.
Illegal? Who knows, baby.
They say they'll all close, but baby...
I'll be there! Just you wait!
Gonna get there by plane or by freight.
Got my tickets online
Before everything coming up closes.
Clear the streets! Coming through!
I will wrangle these tickets from you.
Blackmail, steal, cut in line
Before everything coming up closes.
Robbed TKTS and got dragged out by ear,
Tried homicide and disguising myself as Joe Biden...
Went to jail, started fights
Just to see "Gypsy" and "In The Heights."
I would risk anything
To hear Clay Aiken sing
When desperate, you can't guess what I'll do
Before everything coming up closes... what? Not Hairspray, too!
I can do it-- all I need is the chance
I can do it-- Thirteen's closing? I KNEW IT!
Tickets sold, tickets pawned
Closing tickets to Legally Blonde
Got my seats, up these stairs
In the sex box? Who cares!
'Cause nothing's gonna stop me 'till I'm through!
Until everything closes like Wicked and Xanadu
Everything closes like Rent and like [tos]
Everything closes like SA and Spamalot
Everything coming up closes, except Phantom 2!
In my pants, she has burst like the music of angels, the light of the sun! --Marius Pantsmercy