How should I have handled this, or what would you do?- Page 2

[fosca3]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 5:39pm

And since when is being politely asked to sit next to your OWN child such a horrible request?

I agree that the 'child' (16 or 18?) had every right to enjoy the show

But from the side of the story presented here, I can't say I'm too impressed by his parents. I don't read anything in the original post that is negative towards the child

His parents are another matter...

(I'm done now. Sorry, this thread really got under my skin for some reason)

Updated On: 1/9/11 at 05:39 PM

[CONAries]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 5:48pm

I wouldn't say you handled it politely, but also wouldnt say I was sickened by your behaviour!

You should really have accepted the decline first time and said no more about it, they may have felt they could see over there son better from behind him, after all, its awkward and distracting to others if you have to keep looking over to check your son is behaving in the middle of a show, looking over his shoulder behind is alot easier, alot more sly, and probably meant they could do it without his noticing!

Maybe you should have had a second thought about there situation and respected what decision they felt best with their kids!

But either way, i'm not sickened by you, and I definitely dont think this is an issue anyone should lose sleep over!

[gvanover]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 6:22pm

I would of smiled and been glad to be a part of an activity that allowed him to be happy and that accepts him without judging.

[My Oh My]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 7:40pm

I'm usually a hard ass about stuff like this but the fact it was no secret he had a disability changes things.

It's lack of common courtesy and basic manners that gets to me and this boy wasn't being inconsiderate or rude. That's not to say I would have been thrilled to sit next to him, but I know I would have practiced some patience, accepted the situation, and try not to let it get in the way.

I know I make it sound easy when it was probably a much more difficult situation. I acknowledge that and don't know exactly how distracting it was. I think it's a bit much to be sickened by the OP, because it seems it was handled with as politely as possible, but that's just me.

On the seat change thing: I sometimes go out of my way to obtain the best seats possible and generally find it very bothersome if anyone requests for me to move even one seat down. Sometimes moving down one seat can drastically change one's view if there happens to be someone in front of you who obstructs your view. At 5'4" tall, just about anyone can, lol.

[bluetuna]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 11:44pm

"I would of smiled and been glad to be a part of an activity that allowed him to be happy and that accepts him without judging."

You do need to respect limits, though, and while the boy is not to blame, this is something of which the parents should have possibly been more mindful given their knowledge on their son's special needs.

The OP simply wanted to experience the show (that he/she paid $75 to see) with the least possible distraction, and I understand how that can be difficult given the circumstances. The OP paid to enjoy the show - not to enjoy the experience of other theatergoers, so I don't think that his/her frustration is unfounded.
Updated On: 1/9/11 at 11:44 PM

[finishmyhat]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 11:47pm

The autistic kid paid to enjoy the show as well. Clearly he did. And that offended this OP who didn't think it was as funny as he did.

That's called discrimination.

[finishmyhat]

Posted: 1/9/11 at 11:49pm

"The OP paid to enjoy the show - not to enjoy the experience of other theatergoers"

The kid didn't talk during the show. He laughed louder than she/he did and clapped a little more. You don't go to a PUBLIC venue to enjoy something without distraction. If she didn't think the jokes were that funny but the kid thought they were a hoot, great for him. At least SOMEONE's enjoying Shrek the Musical.

I'm sorry, but it's not about YOU when there are 2,000 people in one room enjoying the same show. If the OP has a problem with public places, seeing live theater should not be something they partake in.
Updated On: 1/9/11 at 11:49 PM

[bluetuna]

Posted: 1/10/11 at 12:25am

The OP said that numerous people were extensively distracted. Plus, a theatre isn't a "public place". You need to pay to get in, and by definition, a public place is one in which a paid ticket or fee is not required for admission.

[muchadoabout_me2]

Posted: 1/10/11 at 3:13am

"The autistic kid paid to enjoy the show as well. Clearly he did. And that offended this OP who didn't think it was as funny as he did.

That's called discrimination."

Now you're just putting words in her mouth. Discrimination is unjust and prejudiced. As the OP stated, she initially offered to switch seats out of courtesy, so that the two families could be with their respective parties. It had nothing to do with the boy's special needs. When she asked a second time, it was because she and the people around her were distracted. Quite frankly, the boy's parents should have noticed this, and should have done SOMETHING when his enthusiasm was becoming distracting. Yes, from what the OP has described, it was just some extra laughing and clapping, but neither you nor I were there; we don't know how distracting it was. It's not luvbrdway's prerogative to say something to the boy, so I think she was justified in talking to the parents.

The boy had every right to be there, of course. I taught piano to two autistic children for a few years, and while I definitely learned patience through the experience, I also saw the effect music had on them. Both of them approached playing and hearing music so imaginatively, and it was inspiring to watch them connect to what I was teaching them in that way. If theatre is what their son connects to, then by all means, don't limit him of it because he's autistic. But in a situation like luvbrdway's, I'd say it becomes more of an issue with the parents who are doing nothing to calm down their son.

[Wishing Only Wounds]

Posted: 1/10/11 at 7:17am

"You do need to respect limits, though, and while the boy is not to blame, this is something of which the parents should have possibly been more mindful given their knowledge on their son's special needs."

Exactly.

[SondheimFan5]

Posted: 1/10/11 at 4:13pm

EVERYONE, regardless of their abilities and disabilities, should be allowed to go to the theatre. Everyone has the right to be entertained and to However, I do think that all who attend the theatre, regardless of age and ability, must be respectful of their fellow audience-members and the performers onstage. That includes loud breathing, talking, body odor, etc. I think it is fine to bring young children and disabled people/elderly people to the theatre as long as they are quiet, attentive audience members. I know several handicapt people who adore the theatre and it is a joy to see them get wrapped up in a show and forget about everything for 2 or 3 hours.