I was a victim of "THE PERFECT CRIME"

I have to preface this message by letting the community know that I'm an educated theater goer who frequents the TKTS booth to utilize as many discounts that I can and after the constant buzz surrounding "The Perfect Crime" at the booth, I figured that I might as well take a chance on this work that claims to be the longest running play in new york history. I don't usually post on these boards but figured it was my responsibility as a New York theater lover, and more importantly a rational human being, to inform the community on what transpired.

I have always prided myself on never leaving a show until the curtain call to show the proper respect to the performers and creative team, but after act one of "Perfect Crime", I could not stomach the possibility of sitting through another second of this rubbish they promote as an artistic theatrical experience. This show was wretched...and don't get my wrong, I enjoy a trashy piece of tragic theater. "In My Life" and "Romantic Poetry" are two of my favorite theater experiences. But this leaves the realm of hilariously unforgettable and transports oneself into the inner depths of hell. There is zero acting to be found throughout the piece. In fact, you know its a problem when you start routing for the entire cast to be murdered, or better yet fantasizing about actually committing said murders. Also, the first sign of mediocrity occurs when the star of the show doubles as a skilled ticket taker until 7:59 pm. She probably should've kept her night job.

I am mostly angry with myself for falling for this cleanly executed tourist trap. After Act 1, I left the theater with a mother of two, a non-english speaking middle aged tourist, and two grandparents from Boca. We were all surrounded by a cloud of confusion and actualy had a great discussion about the validity of the production and the tactics used to trap us. We quickly discovered that we were actually the victims of "The Perfect Crime".

Please trust me and don't become the next victims of this scam and save yourself the money and disappointment. In an effort to save others that are misinformed, make yourself an instrument of disgust and vocalize your opinions to those passing out flyers for "The Perfect Crime" and educate the others around you. Do yourself a favor and take the LIRR and go see the new production of JEWTOPIA at Theater Three in Port Jefferson...it guarantees to be a more fulfilling theatrical experience and

Well, merry christmas to you too, and welcome. No disrespect intended, but The Perfect Crime has been a well-known joke and a vanity piece for something like 20 years. I can understand your not liking it (it is god-awful and poorly performed), but seriously, you joined on christmas eve for the sole purpose of trashing this show? A show that most educated theater-goers think of as a laughing stock? And not only that, you're recruiting others to campaign against it while shilling for another show in Port Jefferson? Also, you fantasized about killing cast members? Aren't you taking this just a tad too seriously?

Where's your christmas spirit?

Hell, I despised Passing Strange, but it didn't make me homicidal, nor did I start prosthelytizing against it.

Also, you quit writing in the middle of a

Me? I don't think for one minute the OP seriously meant he wanted to kill cast members, but don't you find it a trifle odd that he even fantasized it? I have seen a lot of really bad theater and that thought has never crossed my mind.

As to the shilling, honestly, I couldn't care less, but isn't it interesting that he knows just exactly where (theater three, Port Jefferson stop on the LIRR) Jewtopia is playing for that's an obscure little bit of knowledge. Also that he joined today to trash one show and promote another.

"In an effort to save others that are misinformed, make yourself an instrument of disgust and vocalize your opinions to those passing out flyers for "The Perfect Crime" and educate the others around you".

I also really, truly despise people telling me (and others) what I should and shouldn't see. I also don't think someone using a phrase like "make yourself an instrument of disgust" is doing a lot of joking around. Last, I can't for the life of me understand how someone can feel victimized by a piece of theater.

Why haven't I ever heard of this?

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Ghostlight, I do get the impression that when the original poster said that they wanted to kill the cast that it wasn't meant to be an honest to god statement. How many times have we or heard someone else get stressed out and say something like " I swear to god I am going to kill her/him?" Do they actually mean it? No, of course not and we know that it is something said out of annoyance or stress.

As for the production of Jewtopia, I do feel that there are many reasons as to why he knew about it without being a shill. Maybe he lives on Long Island near the theatre where it is playing? Maybe he actually saw the show and knew the name of the theatre due to that. When it comes to naming a theatre on Broadway or off Broadway and the show that is playing there, no one bats an eye or thinks anything of it. However, if it is a show on, let's say, Long Island then there is a problem if someone knows the name.

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I feel your pain!!

As an actor who has performed in over a thousand of the inter active murder mystery musicals (or as is commonly known as dinner, dessert and death) I can empathise. Cartoon characters is the norm in these shows, so perhaps I can understand how you might feel slighted in the quality department.The shows paid rather well, included dinner and sometimes over night accommodations and kept me employed each weekend from 1987 through 2004 and it was certainly more fun than working in a store or other establishment serving the public. Take consolation that you never have to sit through another staged murder mystery! Have a HAPPIER New Year!

"I'm still baffled by the opening sentence. How can someone claim to be an educated theatre goer and not know the reputation of The Perfect Crime?"

I consider myself extremely knowledgeable when it comes to theater. EXTREMELY. SOOOO knowledgeable. But when I saw the show last year all I knew about it was that it was the longest running play and the actress in it had only ever missed one performance in 20 years so when I was offered tickets to it, I went.

In my life I doubt I will ever see an actress as bored on stage as Catherine Russell was. For all I know she was doing her shopping list in her head while speaking every line of dialogue in a monotone that almost put me to sleep. How it's lasted so long is one of those great mysteries. Kind of like how Eden Espinosa still gets work and how Legally Blonde is playing successfully in London.

Updated On: 12/24/09 at 03:50 PM

If you search this board, I believe there are a couple of threads on this show...I read through them one day and I find it fascinating. Isn't Catherine Russell also the company manager or a producer or something like that?

Maybe that's how it ran for so long, if one person does all of those things. The interview TheaterFan4 linked to says that her understudy is also the assistant stage manager.

I see people on here are as catty as ever

Thanks to the original poster for your thoughts on the show

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Add me to the "never heard of it" list

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Even little ol' me in MS has heard about this debacle.

I am dying to see this now. The comments and info online make me think this could be interesting. Also, the actor who played Tom Cudahy on All My Children for about 20 years is in it.
http://www.perfect-crime.com/

Updated On: 12/27/09 at 03:50 PM