Lyrics/Rhymes You Always Wanted To Change

[VonTussleGirl]

Posted: 7/9/06 at 10:49pm

When you're listening to a song, do you ever just want to finish a lyric differently, either to make it rhyme differently or just plain to make it RHYME?

A couple of mine:

"Goodbye Until Tomorrow/I Could Never Rescue You"; TL5Y - Change "All I could love you hard and let you go" to "...love you hard and let you slide."

"A Heart Full Of Love"; Les Mis - Change "These are words he'll never say; not to me, not for me" to "...words he'll never say, not to me, anyway."

"On My Own"; Les Mis - Change "All the lights are misty in the river" and "Every day I'm learning" to "...glistening in the river" and "Every day I'm yearning," respectively.

For me, it usually occurs when the lyric just doesn't seem to fit the rhyme scheme of the surrounding lyrics or when it just sounds awkward - however awkward "my" lyrics sound is beside the point. =)

So... yours?

[Unknown User]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 12:37am

No online snarkiness implied, but I'm pretty sure that "everyday I'm learning" is transitional. It could work either way, but one would make it two mutually exclusive thoughts. And because of overlap on the album, until I actually did the show, I thought it was "anyway!" Jason Robert Brown shouldn't be tampered with. I love him, "The Last 5 Years" need not rhyme. But that's just my ear and it's different than everyone else's.

[whatyouown223]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 12:40am

I don't think it should change but in goodbye until tomorrow from l5y, I thought "and open my wings" was "and I'll spread my wings". Either could work.

[mathewbrock]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 12:43am

"I love him, but everyday I'm LEARNING
All my life, I've only been pretending."

She's not yearning for anything in that phrase. She's LEARNING something about herself... that she's created a world in her head that she would rather be a part of than the miserable one she's in.

She may be yearning for a lot of things, but not in that particular phrase.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 12:45am

Here, here! "How the SATs Helped Me with My Broadway Lyrics."

[VonTussleGirl]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 12:56am

Honestly... I know all this... it's just a matter of taste. The rhymes I mentioned just always bothered me.

[MrSweetNAwful]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 1:01am

Yeah, let you slide does rhyme and sounds a little better, a bit more clever.
But L5Y barely rhymes, why start at the last song. lol.

and "let you go" is more harsh and heartbreaking

[HoshiForever]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 1:11am

The biggest lyric change for me is in Wicked. In Thank Goodness the "there's a kind of a sort of/loss/there's a couple of things get/lost"

I want (nay, need it) to be "as a coupld of things get/lost"

It bothers me everytime.

[MrSweetNAwful]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 1:15am

Oh, that made me think of another Wicked lyric.
I don't want it changed cuz it doesn't rhyme, I want it changed cuz it doesn't make any sense.

Nothing grows for the wicked, they reap only what they sow.


um...If the wicked can't grow anything how can they reap what they plant!?

anyone? or am i stupid?

[Yero]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 1:16am

In "Castle On A Cloud" from Les Mis:
There is a room that's full of toys,
There are a hundred boys and girls.

I would change the order of boys and girls making it girls and boys, making boys rhyme with toys... I never understood why it's the other way around.

[Unknown User]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 1:37am

Sorry! Wasn't trying to be rude-- honestly! Online subtext stinks. My impending English major was just rearing its head.

[BJC899]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 2:22am

I need assistance, to go the distance. - Tarzan

i LOVE the CD, but that line just goes right through me.

[Roninjoey]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 2:43am

Isnt' there already a Disney song about going the distance?

For the record, "I'll spread my wings" doesn't scan to the music correctly or stress right.

[jonartdesigns]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 6:03pm

there are bridges you crossed/
you didn't know you crossed/
until you crossed

i'd sooner buy defying gravity

nessa i've got something to/
confess-a reason...

wicked is literally dripping with terrible lyrics


in the title song from rent i always catch myself making the line "how do you document real life" as opposed to "documentary a life"

[gustof777]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 6:08pm

I know I know JRB is amazing and should never be touched but I always thought that "And I guess he was cute and I guess he was sweeet and I guess he was cute in bed." should have been "and I guess he was cute and I guess he was sweet and I know he was good in bed" with a wicked grin on her face...it's just always what I visualize but that's very minor other than that I wouldn't change a word/note

[Yero]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 6:09pm

It is "document real life".

[Elphabuff2]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 6:49pm

WICKED
Isn't it,
"And goodness knows the wicked's lives are lonely,
Goodness knows the wicked die ALONE,
Nothing grows for the wicked;
They reap only what they've SOWN"?

If nothing's grown for them, then nothing's exactly what they deserve.

[Yero]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 6:58pm

It's actually sew, but that's not a huge deal.

[mathewbrock]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 11:25pm

Besides the misspelling, I totally agree with Elphabuff. Not to defend Schwartz's lyrics (they are by far some of his worst), but yes, if nothing grows for the wicked, then they reap what they sew: nothing. I think you were on the right track, MrSweet, but one step away from what Schwartz was ultimately going for.

Maybe the Castle on a Cloud lyric is Boublil and Schoenberg's idea of an internal rhyme? I have no idea why they would throw it in there, though. It's not like it's a recurring internal rhyme that happens in each verse.

Could someone explain this lyric in WICKED's Dancing Through Life?:

"Dancing through life
Down at the OzDust
If only because dust is what we've come to."

Am I hearing that wrong? I don't have the CD jacket with me to check, but if I'm right, what on earth does that mean?

[zzannahk]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 11:27pm

i always thought it was like, once we're dead, we'll be dust type of thing

[mathewbrock]

Posted: 7/10/06 at 11:32pm

That's the only reference I could make, too, but it still makes no sense to me. "We've been so bored here at school, we're like dust, but if we go partying we'll be alive?" Hmmmm... like I said, not Schwartz's best.

[Mythus]

Posted: 7/11/06 at 12:49am

With the infamous Nessa/confess-a rhyme...I always thought it'd be so easy to change it to:

Listen, Nessa - uh, Nessa,
I've got something to confess,
the reason why, well,
Why I asked you here tonight...

Because isn't he about to say the reason he brought her, not a reason? I'm pretty sure there's only one reason he did.

Ugh, Stephen Schwartz, stop being so lazy.

ETA: I interpret the "dust" lines as: "let's go partying, because we're going to die eventually, so we might as well have fun while we're here."

And Elphabuff was right, it's sow(n). Updated On: 7/11/06 at 12:49 AM

[Elphabuff2]

Posted: 7/11/06 at 12:54am

Not to be an ass, but it's "sown." http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/sown Sorry to be so picky.

I'm not sure about the "dust" thing. It's actually "what WE come to" instead of "what WE'VE come to". I know that seems small, but being an English teacher, I immediately notice the difference. It makes more sense using "we", like "what we all eventually meet upon death," instead of "we've", like "what we all encounter when we reach the Ozdust." Hope that's clear.

[Yero]

Posted: 7/11/06 at 12:57am

My mistake.

[mathewbrock]

Posted: 7/11/06 at 6:32pm

RE: What WE come to.

That makes more sense, I suppose. Had I had the CD jacket with me I wouldn't have made the mistake (like I mentioned). I still don't think it's a very good lyric, and seems more like Stephen Schwartz trying to be clever with words than trying to tell the story. But alas, he is the composer/lyricist and I'm just the observer.