Meeting the same actor twice? — Page 3

For those of you who stagedoor a show more than once, did you ever stop and think that you're usurping the time that first-timers and only-timers might have to chat with a performer? Or should a performer stand on the sidewalk all night just because of groupies?

I can only speak for myself, but I make a point of standing in the back and letting first timers go up close, unless I am there WITH a first timer or have something specific to say to someone.

I met an actor at a stagedoor once and talked to him for about at least 5 minutes, because he graduated from my school. Two months later, I was back there and not exactly stagedooring (long story) but I wanted to quickly just ask him what year he graduated in, because I was curious. I reintroduced myself, explained that I had met him before and he said "Oh, right, you go to [university]!" It shocked the hell out of me that he remembered and it was extremely flattering that I had been interesting enough the first time I met him to be memorable. We ended up talking for about 10 minutes this time about school, how it's changed since he was last there, etc. as well as the show and everything.

I don't stagedoor every show I go to and when I do, it's usually because I have something to say to the actor. I'm not going to waste my time and theirs just for an autograph and a picture- especially more than once- unless I have a reason.

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I would never presume to ask an actor if he/she remembered me; I can't remember the names of some students I had a year ago, and I saw them every day.

I can tell you, however, that when I met Stephanie J. Block for the second time, she hugged me on sight (it's not me; she's just a hugger). I was shocked and said "I don't know if you remember me" because she obviously DID...and she acted as though I were silly for thinking she wouldn't.

She's out of the norm, though--and the precision of her memory is just a little scary, as a matter of fact.

Can I just say that I think it's extremely tacky to meet an actor after a performance and flat-out ask if he or she remembers you? If they remember you, they'll make it clear. Don't ask. You can say "I met you in...." as an ice breaker, I think, but people who are just like "do you remember me?!" bug me. It puts the actor in a weird position, too. Yes, there are people with great memories, but most of them don't remember because they meet so. many. people.

That said, I have often "stagedoored" the same show twice, but now I sort of only do it if I have a reason. I'm too shy to force into conversation an actor who is clearly tired and wants to go home, so I really only talk to people for long periods of time if they initiate it. There are times where even though you've met the same person several times, or had him or her sign a bunch of Playbills, you just want to congratulate him or her on the particular performance. So I've done that with people I've met more than once. Just like a "hey, congrats, the show is great," and then I'm off... not a big deal.

In response to taking up the time of first-timers, though, I think there ARE people who do that, and it's also tacky, especially if it's not an actor who is willing to spend the whole night out there making sure everybody has gotten what they want. With the very small number of actors who I know on a personal level, I never take time away from their signing autographs and posing for pictures; I wait until they're done. Sometimes they have an hour to stand there and catch up, sometimes they have to run. And either way is fine.

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Updated On: 11/4/06 at 12:01 PM

I agree. I'd say most of the time most actors will not remember meeting people from other times before. And in my opinion, what to say to an actor that you've already met, small talk like hello, how you doing? Or maybe like ' great show', or I liked your performance'. Which is probably what they'll only have time for is 'small talk'.

I have to say, I saw DRV twice over the summer and the second time she did not appear to remember me so I just acted like it was the first time. No biggie. But then earlier this week I was at her cd release party and afterward everyone lined up to meet her. She spent several minutes with each person and when she got to me she said, "Hey! I haven't seen you in a while!" with a big hug. Of course I was so shocked that she recognized me that I was like, "who me?" so she got nervous and said, "I have seen you before, right?" lol. When I told her that yes, we had met twice before she then said where we had met and went on to ask why she hadn't seen me at Les Mis yet. lol So sometimes they will remember you . . . but I do think that Daphne is an exception. Every time I have met her she has spent no less than five minutes talking to me (closer to fifteen the first time) and she seems to genuinely enjoy spending time with her fans. I doubt most actors can remember who they have met since they meet sooo many people in a day, nevermind a week!

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There are a few actors who I've met more than once. I would NEVER ask them if they rememebred me, though. I'm too shy, and like Emcee said, it's very tacky. If they remember me, that's fine. If not, whatever. On the rare occasion that they do remember me, I sort of find it odd, since they meet so many people.

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