i've got a new idea!
how about a humble irishman who's obsessed with oscar wilde AND the driver of his bus who wants to put on a production of salome?
i'd say oscar wilde is SO done...
A British linguist taking TWO HOURS to teach a dirty flower seller how to be a lady.
Why would ANYONE pay good money to see THAT monstrousity???
Hmmm... the average production takes three hours to teach that dirty flower seller how to be a lady...
OK, wait. You're telling me you want me to put my money behind a musical about a man who's dying from a brain tumor? You've got to be kidding me! No one would ever pay to see that! What else have you got?
Oh, this one is a real winner. A bunch of tourists on a cruise ship and they're excited to have the worlds most wanted criminal onboard... please, give me something to work with here!
The Taming Of The Shrew? A musical? I don't think so sweetie. Shakespeare should be left to the Brits.
:)
Which reminds me - a musical about 15,000 people losing their lives in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean never really seemed like a real winner, but for some reason it worked for me... I loved it.
Broadway Star Joined: 7/4/04
You opened this Pandora's box, Marc. Best live with it... LOLOL
Featured Actor Joined: 5/20/03
A peasant girl, saved from a flood, finds her true love and suffers a journey from the gods only to die when he marries someone else - dancing to an african-inspired rythm the whole time. So silly.
Or, the stories of Dr. Seuss combined into a musical - eek!
The story of a man and his 12 sons in ancient Egypt centering around a jacket. That'll never work.
There is no way in Heaven or Earth that a musical about a leprechaun, a crock of gold, and a bigoted senator that gets turned into a Black man in the state of Missitucky could EVER succeed!
Who wants to see a show about how a window washer connives his way up the ladder to sucess in the business world?!
People would much rather READ about "The Scarlet Pimpernel" than watch it onstage!
A man who sells his soul to the devil just so his favorite baseball team can win the World Series?! Not even on "The Twilight Zone"!
You know, I really could never figure out why anyone would try to turn Madam Butterfly into a musical. It could only ever work as an opera!
And then there is taking an oceanliner with public enemy number 13 on it and adding a bunch of songs.... Not even someone like Cole Porter could save that one!
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/10/04
I'm thinking: a musical about a bunch of kids who just wanna dance and the town thinks its bad! You know dancing is NOT a crime...
Kevin Bacon for the movie version anyone? It could work!
How about a musical about 2 gangs: the Puerto Rican Sharks, and the American Jets, and a Shark falls in love with a Jet... it'll never work!! And just imagine if Sondheim did the lyrics!! Ha!! That'll never work EVER!!
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/10/04
A woman falling in love with a beast! and talking tea pots and candle sticks!!
a story about a girl on an island who falls in love with the french rich boy. She could tell the story about once being on the island. HORRENDOUS!
Here's one that would never work: A bunch of lions running around with other African animals-- and get this: The lion is best friends with a warthog and a meerkat!! That would SO not work!
Swing Joined: 7/8/04
Wait! What about a musical about a loser bachelor who can't run fast enough from single women anda hangs only with his heterosexually married friends...and doesn't get that he's gay? And he lives in the middle of Manhattan!
Even someone like Sondheim couldn't save such a show...
"Live, live, live! Life's a banquet and most poor bastards are starving to death".
it amazes me a)how many of these things are actually flops and b) how many of these things were repeated but described just a little differently.
Everyone here has taught me a lesson on how to pitch a musical in one sentence or less!
How about a musical about a guy who can walk through walls?
A boy. A girl. Two Fathers. A nut case in a sombrero... and a wall. Oh, yeah... and cardboard moon. I'll try to remember where I've heard this before...
Updated On: 7/9/04 at 12:28 AM
"Ok get this, we take the thing that Verdi guy wrote hundred years ago about a Nubian princess who falls in love with an Egyptian, update it with music by Elton John, and have Disney produce it! What'dya think!...Hello?"
(heh, CATS is quite right. I stand corrected.)
Broadway Legend Joined: 3/4/04
Lesbian4Broadway- Bobby in Company isn't gay. Some directors have probably made him out to be that way, and he was originally conceived that way, but before the original production of Company opened he was made into a heterosexual character. There's an old thread still on ATC about Sondheim and gay characters that talks about it.
ATC
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/31/04
Lets throw a bunch of cabaret songs a composer wrote when he was bored into an order and call it a musical......leaving people to guess what the hell the plot is supposed to be! Updated On: 7/9/04 at 09:48 AM
Stand-by Joined: 11/20/03
How about a collection of songs about dead people -- and while we are at it --- dead dogs too! And let's ask that top-tapping Daddio, William Finn, to write it.
Or how about a show about a Greek chick who gets royally PO'ed when her husband, Jason, dumps her for another woman. This Greek goes off and kills the new wife, and then kills her own two children. Too preposterous for even a Movie-of-the-Week.
Plum, Bobby is still gay. C'mon. Lets be honest, okay...
HMM, so the lead is a 2nd rate night club singer who hooks up w a rich dame who "sponsers" him in his own nightclub but he two times her with another chick and loses everthing? NOT what people want on a Saturday night Pally!
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/10/04
A musical of TERMINATOR. Hey! It's in the worx
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