stage door tips and etiquitte

I am taking my daughter to 6 shows next weekend for her 16th birthday, and she wants to stage door at each. We are seeing War Horse, Mormon (matinee),Phantom, Wicked (matinee), Billy Elliot, and Hair. I would appreciate any tips you might have, or any insight regarding which shows we could expect actors to sign. Would it be acceptable for me to leave quickly at the end of curtain call, and allow my daughter to take my place when she arrives? I ask this because she has a mild physical disability, and does better if she isn't in the middle of a moving throng(my sister would be with her on the way out). Do the actors leave so quickly that it is easy to miss them? Thank you for any advice you can share.

I don't see a problem with leaving quickly so long as you actually leave after curtain call and not before or during. To do otherwise would be rude. As for letting your daughter take your place, I personally wouldn't have a problem with allowing someone to do that for a person with a disability. Of course, you'll always get those that would want to complain. Haters to the left.

And yes, some actors seem to change and get the heck out of dodge as quickly as possible. Most of them (especially the 'Mormon' cast) are very good about coming out to stage door to meet and greet fans.

As others have said, you may have trouble at matinees with actors coming out. I wanted to tell you about War Horse though. If you enter the theatre from its main entrance, the stage door is a level below it. When I went, there was nothing set up and no stage door guard (two things that are usually present). No people were waiting either. I left to take photos of the theatre and when I came back 15-20 mins later, one other person was waiting. We got Madeleine Rose Yen (the little girl), Peter Hermann (the main German soldier), and Seth Numrich (boy who owns horse). They were all really nice, but seemed surprised that we were there.

There was maybe five people (myself and my aunt included) when I stagedoored SOUTH PACIFIC...The performers were all very nice at SP and it was a very relaxed environment. Laura Osnes was humbled that she had fans who waited for her.

In the csae of MORMON, I managed to get all four principals (Rannells, O'Malley, Gad, and James)and a few other signatures. Rannells aside, nobody was in a great hurry. The only problem may be getting there because the matinee lets out when the lottery crowd is gathering up, so one has to push their way through.

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Sounds like a great trip! I'm not sure I would do the switching thing. I think it would be fine most of the time, but some people at the stage door can be weird, and if someone was nasty about it, it might ruin the whole thing for you. Also, if the stage door is really crowded, logistically, it is not realistic. Fortunately, none of the shows you have listed have really crowded stage doors, and it shouldn't be necessary to reserve a spot for your daughter. Being in the second or third row isn't usually a problem in terms of getting the actors' attention -- just requires some reaching.

War Horse: As already mentioned, there is no need to switch for this show -- when I went, there were literally two other people there. The cast is extremely friendly and nice.
Mormon (matinee): This is the only one that might have a large-ish crowd, but when I saw it at a matinee in May, the crowd was pretty small - I'm not even sure they put up barricades.
Phantom: Ask them where the actors come out; if it's at the stage door, it's across the street
Wicked (matinee): If this is a two-show day for them, the principals might not come out
Billy Elliot: The adults don't all go down the barricade, but Billy will
Hair: cast very nice

I think the big thing to do beforehand if you have not already done so is to manage expectations for her, particularly for the matinee shows on 2-show days. Some of the actors will come out before she gets there, and matinees are very hit or miss. For example, I saw Wicked and the only cast members of the 7 principals to come out were those playing Madame Morrible and Boq; I saw Follies and none of the four leads came out; I saw Hair and both the actors playing Claude and Berger did not come out.

As an aside, I have also noticed that Lincoln Center shows do not have big stage door crowds, although I am not sure I understand why. At Coast of Utopia, I was the only person. At South Pacific even with the original cast, there were maybe 5 - 10 people. I agree with what has been said that it is much more relaxed and nicer for everyone with the small crowds.

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The casts of most of those shows DO come out, unlike what people may say I have stage doored Wicked after many matinees, and the leads DO come out, Billy Elliot, most of the cast comes out. Lots of the ensemble and smaller characters will not stop unless you ask them to, but the big stars will! Good Luck, and have fun! :)