Banned Christmas Music

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Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:26am

I absolutely love Christmas music of all styles.

But there are some songs that are just getting played too many times. So list the songs that need to be put into storage until Christmas 2011.

"All I Want For Christmas Is You"

"Baby It's Cold Outside"

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

Updated On: 12/1/10 at 11:26 AM

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:29am

Any version of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas that hangs a shining star on the highest bough.

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:31am

CHRISTMAS SHOES!!!!

....but the world goes 'round

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:39am

'Banned' is such a strong word. Iran bans things. So did the Soviets and Boston. Conservative religions ban things.

I do suggest, however, that "Have a Holly Jolly Christmas" sung by Burl Ives be sent away--to Siberia perhaps--for a stay of a long, very long, duration. Certainly until after I am dead.

"If my life weren't funny, it would just be true. And that would be unacceptable." --Carrie Fisher

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:39am

"CHRISTMAS SHOES!!!!"

Christmas Shoes shouldn't be played at all. They should take every copy of that song out into a field, throw it up in the air and have an expert marksman blast it all to pieces. That song is one of the worst songs I've ever heard.

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:44am

"Last Christmas" I mean, really, how many times can you just repeat the same dumb lyrics. Also anything Manheim Steamroller or Trans Siberian Orch, and over-produced early '90s christmas pop.

"If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or we've got to acknowledge that He commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition and then admit that we just don't want to do it." -Stephen Colbert

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 11:53am

I just read a story where Bob Geldorf apologizes for writing "Do They Know It's Christmas?" as well as "We Are The World".

At least he is taking responsibility.

"If my life weren't funny, it would just be true. And that would be unacceptable." --Carrie Fisher

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:01pm

I agree about "All I Want for Christmas Is You."

But there are so many wonderful versions of "Baby, It's Cold Outside." I'd hate to lose them all.

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:04pm

I just heard a re-run of a "Fresh Air" interview with Martin & Blaine where they talked about all the various revisions to make "Have Yourself" a little cheerier. I actually think the "hang a shining star" line is perfect- it is a bleak, downbeat song and Christmas is all about finding a beacon of hope in the darkest times.

#10

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:14pm

OK, fine, I'll allow Karen Carpenter's version in my dictatorship. :)

#11

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:28pm

There are certain songs that due to the almost perfect marriage of singer and song that I could listen to over and over. For example, last night I had Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah" on repeat for about an hour. So many interesting moments in that song.

With that in mind, I think we have to allow Judy Garland's "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas" The singer and the song transcend mere mortals.

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#12

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:34pm

"But there are so many wonderful versions of "Baby, It's Cold Outside." I'd hate to lose them all."

This is true. So I'll allow the Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Jordan version and the Bing Crosby and Doris Day version.

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#13

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:35pm

"They should take every copy of that song out into a field, throw it up in the air and have an expert marksman blast it all to pieces."

This week, on Sarah Palin's Alaska...

"It does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are 20 gods or no god. It neither picks my pocket, nor breaks my leg." -- Thomas Jefferson

#14

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:45pm

Add me to "Christmas Shoes" list and with my own suggestions:

"Last Christmas (I Gave You My Heart)". The passive aggressiveness of the lyrics of some jaded broken heart getting revenge by giving her heart to somebody else this Christmas. Made so much sense that Taylor Swift did a version of the song.

"Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time" as preservation of Paul McCartney.

Really listening to the lyrics, there is something dark to "Baby It's Cold Outside".

#15

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:47pm

"Really listening to the lyrics, there is something dark to "Baby It's Cold Outside".

Total date rape song.

If anyone ever tells you that you put too much Parmesan cheese on your pasta, stop talking to them. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

#16

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 12:52pm

I'm partial to the song Mr. Hanky and Kenny sing on the South Park Christmas Album, "The Most Offensive Song Ever Written":

"You can s--- all the d--- you want
And still be a virgin, Mary!

#17

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 2:31pm

Honestly, other than Judy's version, or the Rowlf/John Denver duet, "Have Yourself" should be put away.

I for one, would be thrilled to bits if we could get rid of that damn little Drummer Boy.

http://www.youtube.com/huskcharmer

#18

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 2:35pm

I can live without Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer. And the Johnny Mathis recording of Sleigh Ride.

"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian

#19

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:05pm

Unless someone can explain to me the "scary ghost stories" line, let's get rid of "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year."

When I see the phrase "the ____ estate", I imagine a vast mansion in the country full of monocled men and high-collared women receiving letters about productions across the country and doing spit-takes at whatever they contain. -Kad

#20

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:12pm

Well, at least he admitted it sucks:
http://www.theatlanticwire.com/features/view/feature/Bob-Geldof-I-Wrote-the-Worst-Christmas-Song-Ever-2642

#21

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:14pm

Unless someone can explain to me the "scary ghost stories" line

The whole holiday is about a dude who comes back to life from the dead!

Either that or the Grither.

#22

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:26pm

The whole holiday is about a dude who comes back to life from the dead!

I thought that was Easter.

#23

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:35pm

Could they be referring to "A Christmas Carol"? (That Spirit of Christmas Yet to Come was pretty darn scary in my book)

"All I ask of you is one thing: please don't be cynical. I hate cynicism -- it's my least favorite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen." Conan O'Brien

#24

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:36pm

Well, it's the Easter guy's birthday. And his dad is the Holy G-G-G-G-G-Ghost!

#25

Banned Christmas Music

Posted: 12/1/10 at 3:37pm

Oh yes and by the way get rid of the F****n Christmas Shoes

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