Skip to main content
My Shows
News on your favorite shows, specials & more!
Home For You Chat My Shows Register/Login Games Grosses

Favorite Will & Grace quotes? — Page 3

New Post Search Report Abuse Rules

Welcome Guest. Please Login or Register.

#51

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/28/05 at 10:44pm

Patti LuPone had a brief cameo, and she dropped a utensil or something (She, Jack, and Will were all at the same restaurant, and Jack and Will had a table right behind her.)

She asked if Jack could pick up her fork and Jack continued to ignore her for sometime until finally he just lashes out with something along the lines of, "Oh, shut your big, brassy, magnificent trap, Patti LuPone!".


I don't remember the episode very well, unfortunately.
This is my signature.
#52

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/28/05 at 10:51pm

there's something about needing Patti LuPone hair for a broadway diva wig too...mentions Idina and others ... argh I can't remember the exact wording!
#53

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/28/05 at 11:59pm

jsut saw this:

Rosie: I'm gay.
Jack: You're not!
Rosie: I'm gay.
Jack: Say something lesbionic!
Rosie: Home Depot.

so funny!
<--- the set of A Midsummer Night's Dream that I was assistant stage manager for during the 2007 season at the STNJ outdoor stage.

-Dre-
You must remember all the same that at the crux of every game is knowing when it's time to leave the table... And it's important to be artful in your exit. No turning back, you must accept the con is done... It was a ball, it was a blast. And it's a shame it couldn't last. But every chapter has to end, you must agree.
~Dirty Rotten Scoundrels~

There's a special kind of people known as show people. We live in a world full of dreams. Sometimes we're not too certain what's false and what's real. But we're seldom in doubt about what we feel.
~Curtains~

It is a far, far better thing I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest I go to, than I have ever known.
~A Tale of Two Cities ~
#54

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 12:01am

haha, i remember that one, Dre!
Bob: "there is a chance, albeit a microscopic one, that our baby at some point in his or her formative years will get lodged in a tree" ~Related~
#55

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 12:03am

Just seen:

Jack: Karen, I haven't seen you this freaked out since you turned 42! (Forty) One! Thirty-four! 2! 1! Pretty girl, pretty girl!

(All said in rapid succession)
This is my signature.
#56

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 12:06am

WILL: Ooh, uh, before I forget, I need you to write me a check. There's this guy, Ted Bowers. He's running for city council. I really think we should support him.

GRACE: Well, what do we know about him?

WILL: He's gay.

GRACE: And?

WILL: And... he's gay.

GRACE: But what's he for? I mean, you know, where does he stand on the issues?

WILL: What do you care? You thought Buffy was in a prisoner of war camp.

GRACE: I'm just wondering, what are his positions?

WILL: I don't know. I think he's a top.
Honey, I don't produce theater. I am theater.
#57

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 12:11am

from the show with Antiques on the Road when Grace and Jack make up the story about the teapot:

Grace: On Christmas Eve, Grandma Meg lost both of her legs to diabetes.

Porcelain Paul: Oh...

Jack: And then, on Christmas Day, she tragically lost both her feet.

Paul: So, how does the, um, teapot fit into all this?

Grace: Well, it's the only thing that survived the fire that Grandma caused when she... mistakenly answered the iron.

Jack: With her hook.
::bust a move::
#59

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 12:21am

Here's the line:

JACK: Shut up, Patti LuPone! Shut your brassy, magnificent trap! I don't wanna hear you sing. I don't wanna cut your hair. And I certainly don't wanna hear you singing while I'm cutting your hair! Got it?! Now I'm talking to my best friend, so stand back, Buenos Aires!
Honey, I don't produce theater. I am theater.
#60

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 12:26am

Karen: Where are my husband's pills? It's been 2 hours since I asked for them! Now, you give me Stan's pills at once! I want those pills! GIVE ME MY HUSBANDS PILLS!
Nurse: I'm sorry, Mrs. Walker. There you go. (Hands Karen the pills)
Karen: Thank you. (Karen takes them)


Karen: Give it to me straight, Doc. Am I looking at a future filled with loneliness and memories of better days? Or is Stan gonna die?


Grace: Hi, Karen. Look, I just wanted you to know that if-- Oh, my god! Oh, my god! What is that on the table? What is that? Is that a needle? Is that somebody's needle, just out there in the open?
Karen: It's a chopstick, you loon. It came with my lunch.


Karen: Grace... We've been working together for, what, 11 years?
Grace: 18 months.
Karen: It seems longer.


Karen: It's Stan. He needs blood for a bypass. And...he needs it drawn slowly by a large pointy needle.
Grace: Um... Um, I--I--I-- I doubt that--that I would even match. I've got-- I've got a very rare blood type.
Karen: I'm sure it'll be fine.
Grace: What type do they need?
Karen: What type do you have?
Grace: What type do they need?
Karen: What type do you have?
Grace: Um, AB-negative.
Karen: That's the type they need.


can you figure out my favorite episode :P?
::bust a move::
#61

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 1:18am

Karen: Anastasia like Russian royalty. Beaverhausen like... where the beaver live.

Jack: He uses big words like "particular" and "delicatessen."

Will: Have you been gargling from a bong?
"You've gotta have a swine to show you where the truffles are."
#62

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 1:31am

Not going to get it completely right, but this stuck with me forever!

Jack: Will, make me a sandwich.
Will: How about fat chance on rye?

AHHHH. I LOVE THIS SHOW.
"The stage is where I live and come alive and act out all the things that go on in my life. It's not just what I do for a living, it's my shrink and my love affair. No one in my life has ever or ever will kiss me on the mouth like this lover called my relationship with my performance."
#63

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 10:24am

At Bill & Larry's ceremony-
will: what do you think of the cake?
grace: are you kidding? it's got nine layers of chocolate and a snickers bar in the middle. i may move into it.

Will: Have you been gargling with bong water?

Dorlene to Jack about the Barney's window-
Dorlene: You better get this fixed in 24 hours Jack or I will go carnival freak on your ass, I swear. If this isn't fixed by tomorrow, not only will I fire you, but I will REHIRE you, pull your hair and fire you again!

Karen going off on Beverly Leslie again-
Karen: What's it to you, frosted flake? Shouldn't you be up in your tree, makin' cookies?

Karen (looking in the machines at a laundromat): Where are all the fish?
Grace: Karen, this is not an aquarium. It's where people come to do their laundry.
Karen: Oh, poor people are clever.

AND Karen and Roasarion on their shopping trip when Rosario can't decide what she wants to get..

Rosario: What if I said I didn't want any of these things?
Karen: I'd say you were crazy.
Rosario: What if I said that I wanted to spent time with you instead?
Karen: I'd say you were a lesbian
Rosario: What if I said that that's all I wanted for our aniversary?
Karen: I'd say you were a crazy lesbian.











#64

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 10:35am

This was posted in a different thread. It's much funnier with the whole set-up!
Patti on W&G
"I am open, and I am willing, For to be hopeless would seem so strange. It dishonors those who go before us, So lift me up to the light of change." Holly Near
#65

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 11:50am

After Jack finishes yelling at Patti LuPone, she turns back to the waiter and says

"People either love me, or they hate me!"

Sooooooo funny!
~And let us try, before we die, to make some sense of life~
#67

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 6:02pm

Rosie O'Donnell (to Karen): If there were any justice in this world, there'd be an alligator somewhere carrying you as a handbag.

(to Jack): I'm his father! And his mother! And until he was eight years old, I was Santa Freakin' Claus!

Rosario (to Jack and Karen): You two are like Dumb and Drunker.

Karen (on prison): What's so great about the outside, anyway? Just a bunch of people with their dumb dreams and dumber kids.
I ask in all honesty/What would life be?/Without a song and a dance, what are we?/So I say "Thank you for the music/For giving it to me."
#68

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 6:16pm

Ha ha when karen says
"Grace, its christmas, for goodness sake!
think about baby jesus.
Up in that tower, letting his hair down so that the three wise men could climb it, spin the dreidel, and see if theres six more weeks of winter"

I'm Mary ( : I <33 Anthony rapp and Kristoffer Cusick!
#69

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 6:29pm

These will be paraphrased, so forgive me:

Karen (sitting on a bus stop bench with a bunch of maids): Oh, I was just here talking to all these Rosarios.

(Will checks out a guy's butt)
Jack: Will, you know America doesn't like to see you be sexual.

I love the Glenn Close episode. Fave line might be the one where she tells the model to take a lunch break--that there are cigarettes and water at the catering table.

And, I don't think anyone has mentioned the one about Jesus in the tower and 6 more weeks of winter... re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?
johnraymondbarker.com
#70

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 6:30pm

When W&G are fighting in one episode, Jack and Karen want to get them together in the same room. They get an invite to a little kid's birthday party and then they say "Will likes to feel taller then those around him ... Grace likes cake ... Where can we take them to feel tall and eat cake?" while ignoring the party invite :)
#73

re: Favorite Will & Grace quotes?

Posted: 12/29/05 at 8:54pm

Karen: Grace. It's Christmas, for goodness sake. Think about the baby Jesus: up in that tower, letting his hair down... so that the three wise men can climb up and spin the dreidel and see if there are six more weeks of winter.
This is my signature.

Updated On: 12/29/05 at 08:54 PM

← Back to Message Board

BroadwayWorld TV

View all Videos

Ticket Central
Ticket Central
Ticket Central
Hot Show
Tickets From $59
Hot Show
Tickets From $71
Hot Show
Tickets From $71
Hot Show
Tickets From $95
More Hot Shows Discounts
Recommended For You