Homophobia as Indicator of Latent Homosexuality- Page 4

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 6:59pm

you're not the only exception here, Matt.

[Broadway Matt]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 7:08pm

kidding...

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 7:09pm

who is?

[Broadway Matt]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 7:28pm

i was, about being the exception proving the rule. obviously it's not true because the rule is a generalization. there's a good number of straight fellas here, without a doubt. I do think that whatever that number is, the number who will still be straight in 10 years is a good deal lower. i agree with mid in that respect.

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 7:29pm

Oh...I didn't think that's where you were going with that. I'll accept that though.

[Broadway Matt]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 7:36pm

"i didn't think there was any need for a response. Matt pretty much laid it all out there in plain explanation."

i find it funny that you posted about the clarity of my writing, only to have it all shot to hell. well, I said I TRY to be concise, "try" being the operative word.

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 7:40pm

I have my moments of "uh....what?" too.

[MargoChanning]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 8:03pm

Well, when a bunch of you start rolling out of the closet in the few years and showing up in the bars, please be kind enough to save a stool for the elderly MargoChanning ...... and buy her a damn martini!

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 8:05pm

Margo honey...you meet me at a bar near here and i'll buy you all the martinis you want.

[MargoChanning]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 8:08pm

Awwwww ..... how sweet of you, Guido -- I'll have to take you up that one of these days

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 8:10pm

fantastic...bring friends, we'll make a night of it.

(I work at a bar, btw...)

[MargoChanning]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 8:18pm

First date in weeks and it ends up being with a straight Republican -- not that I'm complaining

[Guido Contini]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 8:21pm

heh margo darlin...i'm probably the gayest straight man you'll ever meet. apparently, that's what you get for having so many homosexual friends eh?

[PalJoey]

Posted: 10/5/04 at 10:27pm

What a nice thread this turned out to be! And sexy and interesting too!

And to think it started with a bunch of pansies!

[Zola Q. LaPlaya]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 6:26am

Liberal pansies, Joey.

I'm with midtown in keeping quiet about what I really think. I'm reminding myself that 90 percent of coming out is an internal process, and only 10 percent telling people you're gay.

I do have a question for our straight friends in this gay-straight alliance: why do straight men have such a difficult time acknowledging that another man is attractive? Straight women always talk about beauty in other women. Is it that by admitting another guy is good-looking you fear being labelled gay, or is it that you really don't see it?

Tangentially: I sell clothes and crap by putting my body in and around them, and I've always founds that straight ad guys are generally uptight and hypercompensate with all their "buddy, chief, pal" talk. Straight women and gay men are much more open to deal with the blatant sexuality of advertising, and make the work environment a lot less inhibited and easy.

I love my straight friends, but it would be nice if you could all relax.

[popcultureboy]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 6:45am

why do straight men have such a difficult time acknowledging that another man is attractive?

That is a very good question and it is one that no straight man will ever answer.

[ckeaton]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 9:28am

Not all straight men have that trouble. It's the straight men that this thread was initially intended to deal with (See subject) that have the trouble identifying good looking men.

[rlbgbc]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 9:45am

Interesting point, Zola. I remember a straight friend of mine, in a moment of non-self-censorship, made a statement about the attractiveness of another male. All of a sudden it was like someone threw on the hetero brakes, and he quickly blurted out to the group "not that I would know, or anything..." My succinct response to him -- also in front of the group-- was "bull****". I don't get it.

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:34am

I have straight males friends who are truly straight and are completely confident enough to comment on another male's attractiveness. Not sure how many of them would do so in mixed company as society does place pressures and labels, both.

And, I am referring to men who are really straight--not the ones who are a "little" to completely bi who profess to be straight.

[Plum]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:38am

There are some guys who are perfectly happy to admit their "guy crushes," but in my experience these are few and far between. Most straight men are too concerned with their "machoness" to do such a thing. Everybody wants peer approval, and while women don't appear any less feminine when they say a woman is beautiful, men think they lose their manhood by admitting that other men are attractive. I think that attitude is changing, though. I sound an awful lot like Dr. Pangloss here, but I truly believe that attitudes about sexuality are undergoing a total turnaround now.

[midtowngym]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:43am

JRB-could your sexuality judgment be clouded? For example, you're so over the top G-A-Y that your 'truly straight' friends could be perceived as 'maybe mary's' by a straight-acting butch queen like me?

[robbiej]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:46am

Well...I always battle back to those few straight friends I have who refuse to acknowledge another man's attractiveness with the following (I'll put it in the form of a playlet):

Rob: George Clooney is very attractive.

Straighty: If you say so...

Rob: Wait...you can't recognize that George Clooney is an attractive man?

Straighty: Why would I know from that? I'm straight.

Rob: OK, answer me this question...Do you think you're attractive?

Straighty: (who invariably falls into this trap due to his straight male ego) F*ck yeah.

Rob: Then how would you know if you couldn't compare yourself to the attractiveness level of other men.

Straighty: (confused Dubya look) ...

It works every time!

[jrb_actor]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:48am

midtown--you big lying homo!! I wouldn't describe either of us quite that way AT ALL. lol

[Auggie27]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:54am

Remember how this topic raged when AMERICAN BEAUTY came out? How the Chuck Cooper character, the nabe drill sgt homophobe, had the hots for the butch straight (!) man next door, Keven Spacey? A lot of gay folk rolled their eyes and said oh pu-leeeeeeze, that old cliche! But to be a cliche ... you gotta be true on some level.

Robbiej and other Manhattanites: There's an urban legend about a so-called straight man who stumbled into the Gaiety (nothing homo could ever be over Howard Johnsons!) and never left. And no, I am NOT sitting there with my lap top right now.

As for the age of the bi-curious, I doff my old moth-eaten chapeau to Mr. Mart Crowley, whose BOYS IN THE BAND exchange still has clarity and truth: "Once, you're curious ... twice, it's a coincidence ... three times, YOU LOOOVE IT!!"

[MargoChanning]

Posted: 10/6/04 at 11:59am

"What I am Michael is a 32 year-old, ugly, pock marked Jew fairy, and if it takes me a little while to pull myself together, and if I smoke a little grass before I get up the nerve to show my face to the world, it's nobody's god damned business but my own....... And how are you this evening?"