I just came out to my crazy right wing uncle. On the Facebook.

[Pippin]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 8:49pm

So, I reposted this picture from a friend, and within minutes, my Uncle decides to write down a sermon. Now, we've gotten into political and philisophical issues before on Facebook, and have always left with an agree to disagree mentality. Clearly, we're never going to be on the same page as things. I'm enlighted and he's still in the dark ages. This is what he wrote me:

"Our unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are given by our Creator God. But it seems to me that the liberal agenda is to take away life through abortion as well as happiness by presenting freedom as "do as you please" as though there are no consequences for sinful choices. Liberty is lost when immorality is exalted as normal by those who practice it. Whose rights are being taken away when God's definition of marriage is ignored? Who is taking that which God designed as good (sex between a married man and woman) and seeking to pervert it? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich is defined as a sandwich with peanut butter and jelly. A person can call a peanut butter and peanut butter sandwich a peanut butter and jelly sandwich all day long, but it does not make it one. Since marriage has only one definition--one man and one woman, a gay marriage is an absurdity, a blatant disregard for normal, and a philosphical and moral contradiction against the law of universalitization. Of all that is listed in your poster, the only right that is protected by the constitution is the right to possess a gun. Cigarettes and alcohol--amoral issues. Abortion, porn, sex outside of marriage, homosexualtiy have done much to weaken the moral foundation of our society. History proves that when a culture falls to the immorality it says is a "right" it will ultimately collapse on itself. Be not decieved, God is not mocked, whatever a person (or country) sows, that it will also reap. God--being God, reserves the right to judge all wickedness. No liberal agenda will ever succeed at taking that right from Him."


after a chuckle, this is what I responded with.

" I hear your point, however, you could interchange the word "gay" and "interacial" in your essay. Interacial marriage was also considered "an absurdity, a blatant disregard for normal, and a philosphical and moral contradiction" only 40 years ago, yet it was eventually accepted by (most) rational people. The same will happen with gay marriage, union, partnership, whatever you want to call it. This is not a liberal or conservative issue, it's a human rights issue. Also, I'm gay. hope you are not offended, though I am sure you will be."

I don't know what came over me, I just am so sick and tired of hearing these people preach to me about things that they have no idea about. So, I'm very excited to see what the fallout will be from this.

also, I am out to only a very select few in my extended family, because they are all literally like my uncle Ray, sadly. That is what I live with. I have a boyfriend of nine years, yet every holiday I have to be with my family alone and endure thier slurs and hate speech, and pretend like I'm not affected, And as of right now, if he tells them all, I don't really give a flying s***. I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of saying I'm just waiting to meet the right girl. I'm tired of them all putting down gay people and saying that they and their blood are a despicable thing and that they wouldn't let thier child near one of "them". I'm tired of everything they stand for and believe in, and it's time to let them know that I'm out and proud and not gonna take anymore of the bullsh** and I couldn't care less if they think I'm now going to hell or not. I. Don't. Care.

I know this is alot of info. But I also know this is a safe place where I could unload onto people that will understand.

[supportivemom]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:10pm

Wow! I wonder how he'll respond?! Good for you though! Sorry you have had to deal with this. Hopefully you can now be open to the rest of your family and be able to bring your boyfriend to events.

[Pippin]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:16pm

thanks, Mom!!

I've had to deal with them all my life, so I've learned how to deal with it and have become accustomed to being the black sheep, but it's just gotten too far out of control. Thanks for the support.

[Bettyboy72]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:20pm

Pippin-GOOD. FOR. YOU. :) I can understand you being tired and frustrated and sick of caring what others think-family or not. Live your truth, be free, suffer no fools and let go of people who do not accept you fully as you are.

Sending you love and strength. xoxo

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:24pm

You were very brave, and you stood up not just for yourself but for countless people you'll never know whose lives are affected by people like your uncle--maybe even by your uncle himself.

You were also, very simply, right.

[Calvin]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:42pm

You may be surprised what happens next. There were people in my family I thought would never come around, but they did. And if not, well, maybe it's your turn to make them feel uncomfortable at gatherings for a change.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:43pm

I echo what everyone else has said. And "Creator God" just makes me giggle.

[artscallion]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 9:49pm

Way to go, Pippin!

[Pippin]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 10:00pm

Thanks all for your support. It brings a smile to my face. My uncle has not yet responded, but I am already experiencing what Calving was saying: His daughter sent me a very supportive private message, and admitted to me that she does not think like him anymore, but she has never had the bravery to stand up to him and let him know that she does not agree with his views, and that my statement has inspired her to come to terms with her own and maybe stand up to him for the first time in her life. This was a surprise to me, as I have not talked to her for awhile and figured her for one of the flock of my family, but I am more than happy to be corrected.

[Jay Lerner-Z]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 10:04pm

Well said, Pippin! Maybe if others in the family behave as your cousin, your uncle will realise that actually perhaps his way of thinking is really the thing at odds with morality and Creator God.

[PalJoey]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 10:09pm

Well, done!

And remember: You don't have to fight him, even if he is spoiling for one. All you have to do is live your life and be happy.

[Q]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 11:07pm

"I have a boyfriend of nine years, yet every holiday I have to be with my family alone and endure thier slurs and hate speech, and pretend like I'm not affected"

This kind of breaks my heart.

I'm simply going to point out that the power of CHOICE is an amazing thing, which I think you are now experiencing.

May that strength guide you to a more peaceful and happy existence - for YOU.

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 11/1/11 at 11:37pm

Excellent work, Pippin. It just, as they say, got better, the second your cousin sent the supportive message.

[clever name]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 12:33am

Wow, Pippin. Thank you for sharing that! I'll bet there are a lot of the family who probably feel like your cousin does. Sounds like people are a little afraid to disagree with your uncle.

[strummergirl]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 12:49am

Very brave. Hopefully your cousin found the inspiration to stand up to your uncle.

[Q]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 3:39am

"God reserves the right to judge all wickedness"

I also think your uncle could give a little thought as to what that might actually mean.

[StockardFan]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 7:32am

You go, Pippin!!!!! Good job!

[Broadwayboobs]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 7:47am

Bravo, Pip! Remember...no one mourns the wicked.

[bwaylvsong]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 9:29am

Your uncle sounds like a flat-out idiot. He tries to sound intelligent and all-knowing by using big words he probably doesn't even fully know the meaning of. I can respect his opinion, but not when he states it like that.
Good for you!

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 9:43am

He also frames the conversation using his own (and only his) definitions.

What he really means--to use his silly metaphor--is that a sandwich can only ever be a PB and J. But the response is obviously no, sometimes it can be a ham and swiss. And it's still a sandwich.

[ShbrtAlley44]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 9:55am

Plus, a peanut butter and peanut butter sandwich is a peanut butter sandwich. And that's yummy too.

Well done, Pippin!

[doodlenyc]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 10:05am

Not to mention that some people are allergic to pb...and prefer grilled cheese.

Awesome job, Pippin!
Thanks for sharing such a personal story (although I guess it WAS on facebook).

[Reginald Tresilian]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 10:14am

Not to mention that if Unc has a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and I make myself a peanut butter and peanut butter, guess what? He STILL has his PB & J.

[Pippin]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 10:39am

I woke up to his response this morning:

"Actually I am not "offended" at your being gay. You are my nephew and I love you. I may not be in total agreement with you but that does not mean that we stop being family. In response to your "interracial" analogy, the difference is that if a black man and a white woman were to marry, their marriage would not be redifining the societal and biblical definition of marriage as being between one man and one woman. BTW, this is why it is best (in my humble opinion) to seek out answers from the Bible. God has never endorsed the redefining of marriage (always one man and one woamn) but has endorsed interracial marriage through the marriage of Moses and the Cu****e woman--validating such a relationship. I hope you have a great day. Love, Uncle Ray"

[FindingNamo]

Posted: 11/2/11 at 10:49am

I guess you could force him down the admonishments against shrimp and fabric blends avenue and proper punishment for a slave as described in the bible, but why bother? Live a happy life!