Best Rhyme Ever — Page 2

Greens, greens and nothing but greens:
Parsley, peppers, cabbages and celery,
Asparagus and watercress and
Fiddleferns and lettuce-!

He said, "All right,"
But it wasn't, quite,
'Cause I caught him in the autumn
In my garden one night!
He was robbing me,
Raping me,
Rooting through my rutabaga,
Raiding my arugula and
Ripping up my rampion
(My champion! My favorite!)-
I should have laid a spell on him
Right there,
Could have changed him into stone
Or a dog or a chair...

But I let him have the rampion-
I'd lots to spare.
In return, however,
I said, "Fair is fair:
You can let me have the baby
That your wife will bear.

And we'll call it square."

INTO THE WOODS

Another Sondheim, from Follies this time:

"In the depths of her interior
Were fears she was inferior
And something even eerier
No-one dared to query her superior exterior"

By no means the best rhyme, but it's one of my favourite.

"Will I lose me dignity?
Will someone care?
Will I wake tomorrow, from
This nightmare?"

Here are some of my faves from little shop:

"I've tried you at levels of moisture
From desert to mud.
I've given you grow-lights
And mineral supplements.
What do you want from me- Blood?"


"I know Seymour's the greatest,
But I'm dating a semi-sadist. "

hehe, jera

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Updated On: 7/4/05 at 08:58 AM

Several of these are half rhymes (castle/asshole), which I consider sort of cheating.

Almost anything by Cole Porter qualifies.
Birds do it, bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love.
...
It's the wrong time and the wrong place
Though your face is charming it's the wrong face...

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Pretty much all of How I Saved Roosevelt from Assassins.

"Isn't it rich? Isn't it queer?
I thought that you'd want what I want.
Sorry, my dear."
Send In The Clowns - A Little Night Music
Thinking about it, pretty much the rest of the song, too!
Thanks for this thread, Thenardier. Interesting speculations.

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From "One touch of Venus"...

I once knew this woman from Flatbush
Who thought Kittens came from a cat bush"
(or something like that)


from Lyle Lovett...

Honey, put down that flyswatter
and pour me some ice water

Okay, this is more under the catagory of "best lyrics" rather than "best rhyme," but:

"I'm his December bride,
He's father - he knows best.
The kids watch Howdy-Doody
As the sun sets in the west."

from "Somewhere That's Green" from Little Shop.


At least it's one of my favorites.

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Updated On: 7/4/05 at 10:24 PM

Sondheim's internal rhyming is truly master work. If you haven't studied it, listen to his scores and take note. Classic poetic rhyming at the end of lines is easy for most composers. Internal rhyming where the rhymes are placed 'off verse' within the line is not done well by most who attempt it.

Sondheim is a genius at this. I won't give you examples because I think the discovery of these is the most interesting part of the journey. Have fun.

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"I had a brother"
"No".....
I thought I had been more than reasonable, and that we all might
live happily ever after. But how was I to know what your father had
also hid in his pocket?! You see, when I had inherited that garden,
my mother had warned me that I would be punished if I ever were to lose
any of the

Beans.
Baker, Wife: Beans?
Witch: The SPECIAL beans.
I let him go,
I didn't know
He'd stolen my beans!
I was watching him crawl
Back over the wall--!
And then bang! Crash!
And the lightning flash!
And--well, that's another story,
Never mind--
Anyway, at last
The big day came
And I made my claim.
"Oh, don't take away the baby,"
They shrieked and screeched,
But I did,
And I hid her
Where she'll never be reached.
And your father cried,
And your mother died
When for extra measure--
I admit it was a pleasure--
I said, "Sorry,
I'm still not mollified."
And I laid a little spell on them.
You too, son.
That your family tree would always be a barren one...
(laughs)
So there's no more fuss
And there's no more scenes
And my garden thrives--
You should see my nectarines!
But I'm telling you the same
I tell Kings and Queens:
Don't ever never ever
Mess around with my greens!
Especially the beans.

INTO THE WOODS

"All the guests of Mr. Hackl are feelin' great and look spectac-a-lar"

Even though it's not a real rhyme, it's proof that Howard Ashman was a genius:

"I thrill when I drill a biscuspid
It's swell, though they tell me I'm maladjusted!"

Also;

"Phone rings
Door chimes
In comes
Company

No strings
Good times
Room hums
Company"

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If nobody's said it... All of Seussical... I know its not the best show, but you gotta admit- its Dr. Seuss!