To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout "The Vertical Hour"...
To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout "The Vertical Hour"...
#1To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout "The Vertical Hour"...
Posted: 11/14/06 at 12:51am
I didn't get a chance to thank you after the show for making tonight a truly unforgettable theatergoing experience. Your pretending it was someone else really tricked me at first but I was on to you towards the end of act one, you silly goose! If you hadn't have had your husband with you I would have wanted to get closer to you and your intoxicating aroma, alas your beloved had his arm around you most of the night making that impossible. He's a lucky man, he is.
So on behalf of myself and everyone in and around Row H at the Music Box theater tonight, we thank you and hope to see you again REAL soon.
TheatreDiva90016
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/10/04
#1re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical Hour'...
Posted: 11/14/06 at 12:52amROFL..........
"TheatreDiva90016 - another good reason to frequent these boards less."<<>>
“I hesitate to give this line of discussion the validation it so desperately craves by perpetuating it, but the light from logic is getting further and further away with your every successive post.” <<>>
-whatever2
#2re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical Hour'...
Posted: 11/14/06 at 12:53amDAME, you should really apologize.
"The Spectacle has, indeed, an emotional attraction of its own, but, of all the parts, it is the least artistic, and connected least with the art of poetry. For the power of Tragedy, we may be sure, is felt even apart from representation and actors. Besides, the production of spectacular effects depends more on the art of the stage machinist than on that of the poet."
--Aristotle
--Aristotle
TheatreDiva90016
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/10/04
#3re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical Hour'...
Posted: 11/14/06 at 12:54am
Maybe it was Flabreezeeo2 who did nothing but fart and beltch on this board all day.
*EDIT* Spelling oops
"TheatreDiva90016 - another good reason to frequent these boards less."<<>>
“I hesitate to give this line of discussion the validation it so desperately craves by perpetuating it, but the light from logic is getting further and further away with your every successive post.” <<>>
-whatever2
Updated On: 11/14/06 at 12:54 AM
NathanLaneStalker
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/11/06
#4re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical Hour'...
Posted: 11/14/06 at 12:56amHAHA!
"I'm tellin' you, the only times I really feel the presence of God are when I'm having sex and during a great Broadway musical." - Nathan Lane - Jeffrey
#5re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical Hour'...
Posted: 11/14/06 at 12:56amFunniest Thread Title EVER!
#6re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical
Posted: 11/14/06 at 1:02am
GOLD! Thanks, Jordan. 
Variations on a Theme blog: http://panekattack.blogspot.com/
#7re: To the lady sitting next to me who farted all throughout 'The Vertical
Posted: 11/14/06 at 1:04amOh, don't thank me. Thank the lady in the sweatpants sitting next to me tonight.
#9"Please silence your..."
Posted: 11/14/06 at 1:11am
Oh no! You didn't mention that she was also wearing sweatpants.
I think it's time to add something to that opening announcement about cell phones and candy wrappers...
"I have got to have some professional music!" - Big Edie
#10'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 6:26amthanks for starting my day off with a real laugh
#12'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 7:19amWho wears sweatpants to the theatre?
Well I didn't want to get into it, but he's a Satanist.
Every full moon he sacrifices 4 puppies to the Dark Lord and smears their blood on his paino.
This should help you understand the score for Wicked a little bit more.
Tazber's: Reply to
Is Stephen Schwartz a Practicing Christian
justafan2
Broadway Star Joined: 3/25/04
#13'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 7:28amWho wears sweatpants to the theater? Well, I guess someone who doesn't think anything of gassing up the place. Very funny thread---unfortunately at Jordan's expense! :)
#14'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 8:06am
TechEverlasting, I'd take the sweatpants over the latter.
Jordan, how horrible, yet very, very funny (your retelling that is).
Hey Dottie!
Did your colleagues enjoy the cake even though your cat decided to sit on it? ~GuyfromGermany
rockfenris2005
Broadway Legend Joined: 4/10/04
#15'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 8:14am
Hahaha so that explains the hole in the seat :P
Who can explain it, who can tell you why?
Fools give you reasons, wise men never try
-South Pacific
ShbrtAlley44
Broadway Legend Joined: 8/1/03
#17'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 8:17amThe EXACT same thing happened to me the weekend Mamma Mia opened. As much as I tried having a good time, the woman next to me kept up-ending my fun. That's probably why Mamma Mia never made my top ten list.
#18'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 8:28am
I dare you to post it on Craigslist "Missed Connections". 
"Winning a Tony this year is like winning Best Attendance in third grade: no one will care but the winner and their mom."
-Kad
"I have also met him in person, and I find him to be quite funny actually. Arrogant and often misinformed, but still funny."
-bjh2114 (on Michael Riedel)
Updated On: 11/14/06 at 08:28 AM
-Kad
"I have also met him in person, and I find him to be quite funny actually. Arrogant and often misinformed, but still funny."
-bjh2114 (on Michael Riedel)
Auggie27
Broadway Legend Joined: 10/13/03
#19'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 8:30amTMI. (How was Ms. Moore?)
"I'm a comedian, but in my spare time, things bother me." Garry Shandling
#20'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 9:16am
I suspect the sweatpants are necessary...in case of the mad dash to the restroom.
Glad you enjoyed your flatulent experience.
Craig's list...yes...post this!
"Carson has combined his passion for helping children with his love for one of Cincinnati's favorite past times - cornhole - to create a unique and exciting event perfect for a corporate outing, entertaining clients or family fun."
"In Oz, the verb is douchifizzation." PRS
"In Oz, the verb is douchifizzation." PRS
SorryGrateful
Broadway Legend Joined: 5/10/05
#21'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 9:20amThat's nasty! Yet hysterical in the telling.
You promised me poems. ~Tricky
#22'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 9:25am
I had this obnoxious couple sit next to me when I saw "I Love you, Your Perfect, Now Change". He farted a few times (loud), I swear she coughed up a hairball or something, and then through an entire song during Act 2, they started making out and groping each other. My fiance said something to them, they told him "We paid for the tickets we can do whatever we want" and huffed away.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that Jordan.
BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless
SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!
#23'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 10:10am
To quote Sondheim:
Please don't fart
There's very little air
And this is art.
#24'Please silence your...'
Posted: 11/14/06 at 10:15amAnd now I know which thread I'm coming to when I need a good laugh.
Hey Dottie!
Did your colleagues enjoy the cake even though your cat decided to sit on it? ~GuyfromGermany
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