100 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do

[Gothampc]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 8:20pm

Some of these are true. Some the server has no control over.

http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/10/29/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-one/


http://boss.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/05/one-hundred-things-restaurant-staffers-should-never-do-part-2/

[AbbaRabbit]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 8:44pm

two things i didn't like...


7. Do not announce your name. No jokes, no flirting, no cuteness.

the most memorable resturant experience i've had was on cape cod... BECAUSE the waitress gave us her name, and not only told us her father was a magician, but performed a small trick for us. this was not a magic themed resturaunt, it was a local diner.

8. Do not interrupt a conversation. For any reason. Especially not to recite specials. Wait for the right moment.

if the wait staff was just standing there while i was having a conversation, i'd feel like they were listening in.

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 8:49pm

Now read Steve Dublanica's (author of Waiter Rant) response.

As a former waiter, I can say that there are WAY MORE than 100 things a customer shouldn't do at a restaurant. For example, Buschel says to "never touch a customer." Two-way street. Never, ever touch your waiter either (unless it's to offer a polite hand shake).


http://waiterrant.net/?p=1485

Updated On: 11/5/09 at 08:49 PM

[Jane2]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 9:13pm

#17 is never ever followed, no matter how high end the restaurant is, in my experience. This irritates me to no end. I often say something to the busboy (who doesn't understand me anyway).

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 9:16pm

For what it's worth, I always tried to follow #17 when I was waiting tables, and I appreciate it now as a diner. But it has a lot to do with restaurant managers, not the servers and busboys. If they see several empty dishes on a table, uncleared (or "pre-bussed"), they assume that we're being lazy, rather than following proper etiquette.

[Jane2]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 9:22pm

^ Then the managers are clueless.

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 9:22pm

Truer words were never spoken.

[Eris0303]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 9:47pm

I have no issue with the waitstaff telling you their name. Once in LA the waiter became our best friend for the evening. It was a great night.

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 11/5/09 at 10:35pm

"24. Never use the same glass for a second drink."

Amen. I don't like my second diet coke in the same cup. Takes away all the God damn class I been trying to present myself with all f'in night.

[BDrischBDemented]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 12:12am

What number is "Don't tell Kevin Spacey to stop smoking" on there?

[Craww]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 2:35am

17 would never occur to me because I personally like empty dishes being cleared.

Sometimes I marvel that I'm still such an adamant advocate for proper and generous tipping, because all of the waiters who post lists and rants on the internet are complete dicks. Both Buschel and the irreverent responses on waiterrant.net are consistent with that.

[Q]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 2:51am

I worked in this industry for many years, on many levels. In my experience, the only thing you really need to know is 'make the experience fit the situation'. Just because a venue is designed as 'high end', with the attendent expectations, doesn't mean that's what the customer is aware of or even wants. And that works in the other direction, as well.

In the end, it all boils down to one human being serving another human being food. The environment sets a stage, but all the players determine how the acts will unfold. Approaching the situation with hard and fast rules - whether it be Denny's or the Ritz - will never satisfy anyone.

And for the record, although most of my work was in management, my treasured memories are from my experiences as a server. Mostly because I trust my ability to connect with other people - the incidentals of what needed to transpire were merely details.

[Craww]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 3:06am

See. Now that's what I like to hear.

[Biff AKA Levi]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 3:32am

I disagree with some of these. I haven't waited tables in almost a year, but I'm going to pick up some shifts this holiday season at a small restaurant in the Castro.

I've *always* been told to always introduce myself. This isn't just at the Castro restaurant. I was told to introduce myself when I worked for Chili's in high school. My exact intro was, "Hello/Hi/Hey. My name is Austin and I'll be taking care of you."

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 8:20am

In my experience, if you don't tell the patrons your name, they're just going to ask you anyway, so it's easier to just introduce yourself ("Hi, my name is...") when you first approach the table. However, Dublanica is also right--they usually just want to know your name so they can shout it across the dining room when you're busy attending to someone else.

[Jane2]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 8:45am

"17 would never occur to me because I personally like empty dishes being cleared."

It's more about the person who is still eating and the attempt to make him/her as comfortable as possible by not starting to clear the table as if the meal is over. No need to rush a patron who is eating. I think it's about respect.

[Q]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 8:49am

#17 is easily handled by a quick, "Would you like me to clear these for you?"

The issue is better left up to them, rather than trying to impose some sort of general rule about what is appropriate.

[Jordan Catalano]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:01am

Having worked in the customer service for more than 13 years off and on, I've grown to hate people. The phrase "The customer is always right" is the worst thing to happen to civilization since organized religion. In some way it's almost as bad because it gives people free reign to act and say whatever they want in an establishment and hide behind that phrase. Your waiter didn't kiss your ass enough? Well than you must get your meal for free. Your waiter accidentally put the wrong plate in front of you and got defensive when you started belittling him and treating him like a fourth grader? Well than you need to talk to the manager and see that he gets fired.

And no, these aren't some obscure instances of people having a bad day. This is most people who feel like the second they step into any environment where they will be spending any amount of cash, they are now to be treated as royalty or better.

I got to the point after 10 years in the same place where I just wasn't taking it anymore. Customers knew that and expected it from me. I wasn't rude at all, I just called people out on their bullsh*t. They knew coming in there that they couldn't play their games with me because it just wasn't going to fly with me. When they asked to speak to someone higher than me, I told them they could do that but there's a reason I'd been here as long as I had and dealt with situations much worse than this and, really, you know you're trying to scam something so do you reeeeally want to go "higher than me"?

I understand the economics of the whole thing. Each establishment wants to keep customers coming back to them and the way to do that is to kiss their asses, I get it. I just hate what it's turned people into.

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:10am

Great post, Jordan. Sadly, most people believe that because they're the ones who technically pay waiters (by leaving a tip) that they're entitled to treat them however they please. I once had a guy who wouldn't look me in the eye as I was taking his order, and who told me that if his food wasn't ready within ten minutes, he would leave. When I told him that he could save himself ten minutes and leave right now, he tried to get me fired. So, basically, he can talk to me any way he likes, but if I give it back to him it's grounds for termination. Most people just don't have manners any more.

In response to the actual article, I think that some of the rules are totally true, while others are totally patronizing. The guy who wrote it is obviously new to the restaurant business--he makes his ignorance quite clear by listing things that are either a) common knowledge or b) not done in any restaurant.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:22am

4. If a table is not ready within a reasonable length of time, offer a free drink and/or amuse-bouche. The guests may be tired and hungry and thirsty, and they did everything right.

I'm not sure what "they did everything right," but in many places servers have no right to offer free stuff at their discretion.

I know that 17 is generally a staple in fine dining establishments, but there are just as many people who demand you take their plate as their are who expect you to leave it until everyone else has finished the same course.

20. Never refuse to substitute one vegetable for another.

Again, this is generally not a server's call to make.

Do people really get bent out of shape when a server says what his favorite special or dessert is? I had no idea.

As someone who worked in restaurants for years, I'd remind customers that servers are at the end of the day just human beings trying to do their damn job.

[Marianne2]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:24am

I agree about the name thing. Where I used to work, I'm fairly sure the wait staff was told to introduce themselves. I think it just makes the experience a little more personal.

And the bottled vs. tap water thing might be a big deal for some people. Usually tap water is free, but bottled isn't, depending on if you serve both or the kind of bottled water it is.

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:25am

Yeah, individual waiters usually don't have the discretion to offer any kind of free food/drink without a go-ahead from the manager/owner/executive chef. And most customers will outright ask what dishes the waiter recommends, so what response should be given? "Sorry, I cannot comment--it wouldn't be fair to the other dishes"?

Re: water. If you said it the way that Buschell says it in his article--"bottled water or just tap?"--then yes, it's somewhat patronizing. But if you simply ask what a customer prefers--"tap or bottled?"--then it's not only justified, it's expected.

Updated On: 11/6/09 at 10:25 AM

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:28am

And often, servers are instructed to push bottled water over tap. A lot of this stuff is all manager discretion.

I liked this comment.

I disagree with your description of "No Problem." It doesn't necessarily invite a tone of sarcasm or insincerity.

In fact, your use of "Herewith" at the beginning of this article annoys me a lot more than "No Problem," as "herewith" seems arrogant or supercilious. A simple "Here" would have sufficed.

[ashley0139]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:38am

I have never worked in food service, and I HATE the phrase "the customer is always right." Of course the customer is not always right. It's stupid. Lots of customers are a*ses just for the sake of it. Doesn't make them right just because they are paying.

Also, I often ask what dish the server recommends. Should the waiter not tell me when I ask? I don't understand. And I'm pretty sure dishes don't have feelings.

[AC126748]

Posted: 11/6/09 at 10:41am

Yeah, that was one of the many laughable "rules" that the author of the article states. Of course the server is going to tell you what dishes he/she likes. Although, it's true, some servers may use such an opportunity to push a more expensive dish--eg, lobster tails over pasta primavera.