100 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do — Page 2

True, but even customers should be expected to treat their servers with respect.

I would imagine that someone who takes issue with being told the server's name (and has 99 other dining out pet peeves) runs into a lot of problems when he dies out.

"dies out"--wonderful typo.

And you'd be right: these are the people that servers/managers dread. They'll make a stink over anything.

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In my experience, servers who had consistant problems with customers were usually more involved in the creation of those problems than they were able to recognize or admit

Oh, I agree. Unforgettably, there are a lot of people who really do seem to LOOK for a problem whenever they dine out. My father and his wife are a prime example. They are poised to complain the second they walk in the door.

Jordan - have you ever confronted her about that? I couldn't participate in that scenario - she'd be sitting alone at the table, or at least without my presense.

No, it's not worth it at this point. She's one of those "set in my ways" people. We all have them in our families, I'm sure.

I saw my father last weekend at my brother's wedding and he was complaining about some restaurant that actually made you PROVE it was your birthday to get a free meal or dessert or whatever. The nerve!

In the spirit of this thread (and the article that inspired it), I'll offer a brief list of things that customers should never do:

1. Don't be late. If you have a 7:00 reservation, arrive promptly. Your table becomes fair game for the wait list if you're more than fifteen minutes late.

2. Try to arrive with your entire party. Don't get angry if the hostess won't seat you straight away if your entire party hasn't arrived. This is a standard rule at most restaurants.

3. Don't grovel over prices. If you want top shelf vodka in your cosmopolitan, expect to pay a little more.

4. There is no such thing as "between medium-rare and medium". It's one or the other. Know how you like your food cooked.

5. Don't complain about split charges. Again, they are standard in almost every restaurant, and they are there to (slightly) make up for the money they're losing because you don't want to pay for two full entrees.

6. Don't try to impress me (or your dinner companions) with your knowledge of food and wine. We've all watched an episode of Top Chef and can rattle off terms like "heirloom tomatoes" and "oenology".

7. Don't act like your server is below you! Look me in the eyes when I talk to you, say "please" and "thank you," etc. It's called manners!

8. Don't walk into a busy restaurant on a Saturday night without a reservation and expect to be seated right away. You have a better shot at getting Rush Limbaugh to officiate a gay marriage.

9. Don't tell me that you're a regular. If you were a regular, I would know who you are.

10. Don't tell me you're friends with the owner. See above.

11. Don't ever touch a waiter/busser/host, unless it's to offer a friendly handshake.

12. Don't scream my name (or worse: "WAITER!") across the dining room. If you want my attention, politely signal me over to your table.

More to come, I'm sure.

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Then you better eat faster!

Sometimes I think people see you behind the counter or the notepad and assume you're uneducated. You only have a job like retail or waiting tables because you're not smart enough to do anything else. I was in retail for a long time and I just often got that impression from people. I strive to treat waitstaff and retail workers with respect. But at the same time if I feel like I'm being wronged I'll stand up for myself and I have the right to. As do you.

On a recently trip to Rite Aid I had a not so pleasant experience with a woman who turned out to be the assistant manager. I went to the front to pay for my purchases and she was on the phone and stayed on the phone while ringing me up. When I went to swipe my card she put my finger in my face to stop me because she had to push a button first. When the little machine asked if I wanted cash back she reached over and clicked "no" before I could. She also accepted the amount for me as well. Everything she did for the entire transation was wrong. I might have let the phone call slide. I might have even let the finger in my face slide. But to decide what happens with my money? I don't think so. As the owner of the money it is my right to decide if I want cash back. Maybe I needed some cash. How was she to know? At the end I said "Thank you. Have a nice evening" and got no response so I marched myself back to the pharmacy and asked to speak to a manager. I was told she was up front on the phone. I explained what had happened and they said they would tell the store manager. The next day I got a call from the woman who had rung me up. She said she had been on the phone with her district manager and it was important. Um, wouldn't your DM want you to perform your duties?

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63. Never blame the chef or the busboy or the hostess or the weather for anything that goes wrong. Just make it right.

Translation: take the blame for anything that goes wrong.

69. If a guest is having trouble making a decision, help out. If someone wants to know your life story, keep it short. If someone wants to meet the chef, make an effort.

Didn't this tool just tell us five minutes ago to never give our opinions about dishes?

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Updated On: 11/6/09 at 01:27 PM

God bless the people who work for him. He must be one bitch of a boss, with his 100 draconian rules.

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