#3751
Posted: 7/3/12 at 7:46am
I say, wear shorts and a tank, bring in the George Forman and grill up some italian sausage and peppers, and finish off a big bottle of Malibu. Screw them!
Can the Adults Please Smoke? Chapter 35: Look Who's Here,We're Still Here!! — Page 151
#3752
Posted: 7/3/12 at 7:47am
G'morning.
I had a very disconcerting experience yesterday in the park. This little girl, about 4 years old and parents nowhere in sight, kept following Max and me. At first I was polite and let her pet him, but she kept following me and trying to play with Max, getting him agitated and out of control. Just as I bent down to pick him up so I could get the hell out of there, she tried to get him to "sit," and when he wouldn't she HIT him! She hit him so hard he yelped and jumped into my arms. I was so shocked and enraged, but I kept my cool and just held him and walked out of the park, saying "I'm taking him home now." She followed me all the way out to the street but I kept going, hoping she'd be hit by a bus. For all I know she is still wandering the streets. I don't care.
Where the hell were the parents?
Max was fine by the time we got home, but I was shaken all night.
I had a very disconcerting experience yesterday in the park. This little girl, about 4 years old and parents nowhere in sight, kept following Max and me. At first I was polite and let her pet him, but she kept following me and trying to play with Max, getting him agitated and out of control. Just as I bent down to pick him up so I could get the hell out of there, she tried to get him to "sit," and when he wouldn't she HIT him! She hit him so hard he yelped and jumped into my arms. I was so shocked and enraged, but I kept my cool and just held him and walked out of the park, saying "I'm taking him home now." She followed me all the way out to the street but I kept going, hoping she'd be hit by a bus. For all I know she is still wandering the streets. I don't care.
Where the hell were the parents?
Max was fine by the time we got home, but I was shaken all night.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3753
Posted: 7/3/12 at 7:50am
Crap, Deet - that's horrible on so many levels! I don't think I would have been able to hold my tongue.
'Morning, all!
'Morning, all!
#3754
Posted: 7/3/12 at 7:57am
I know. It's strange how many thoughts can race through your mind in moments like that. My first instinct was to protect Max, but in a matter of a millisecond I also debated yelling at her, and/or smacking her over to the east side of the park, and then realizing that I'd be in trouble with either of those options so I decided to just get the hell out of there as quickly as possible.
I know Max is a magnet for nearly everyone -- he is a beautiful dog, and he's very, very friendly in that irresistible puppy way. But I stick to my original thoughts from 30 years ago: I like children, well done with steak sauce on the side.
I know Max is a magnet for nearly everyone -- he is a beautiful dog, and he's very, very friendly in that irresistible puppy way. But I stick to my original thoughts from 30 years ago: I like children, well done with steak sauce on the side.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3755
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:03am
Where's that little bitch...
I hung out with Cheyenne Jackson in his dressing room waayyyyyy before he tickled D2. "unleash the girly"
Our fingerprints don't fade from the lives we touch.
Puppies are babies in fur coats.
Tinfoil...The Terrorizing Terminator
#3756
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:03am
haha unleash the girly
ETA - that was freaky timing
BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless
SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!
ETA - that was freaky timing
BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless
SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!
Updated On: 7/3/12 at 08:03 AM
#3757
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:19am
That's because you know her so well.
#3758
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:21am
Deet, you should have said calmly to her..."how would you like it if I slapped you?" That always takes kids by surprise and makes them think. Sometimes they even cry just imagining you slapping them. Yes I know from experience. 
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
#3759
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:22am
I figured you'd seen my post. Haha!!
I hung out with Cheyenne Jackson in his dressing room waayyyyyy before he tickled D2. "unleash the girly"
Our fingerprints don't fade from the lives we touch.
Puppies are babies in fur coats.
Tinfoil...The Terrorizing Terminator
#3760
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:23am
911: "I'd like to report an abandoned child in Central Park."
#3761
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:26am
For all I know, the 'rents were hidden behind a tree watching the whole thing and just waiting to jump out yelling "Ay Caramba, Child Molester!" or something like that. Had it been in a controlled situation like a house party or something like that, absolutely, Boobs.
But at that moment, in the park -- the best option was to get out of there as quickly as possible without attracting too much attention. I would have been in a no-win situation had I done anything else.
But at that moment, in the park -- the best option was to get out of there as quickly as possible without attracting too much attention. I would have been in a no-win situation had I done anything else.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3762
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:30am
yes, you really didn't have much other of a choice. Stupid people ruining perfectly good mornings.
BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless
SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!
BroadwayBoobs: I'll give all of you who weren't there a hint of who took the pictures ...it rhymes with shameless
SOMMS: I knew it was Tink!
#3763
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:31am
Congrats Deet on keeping your composure. I know my Italian rage would have gotten the best of me. Thanks, Grandma!
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
#3764
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:33am
It wasn't easy, Boobs. If I'd gone to Starbucks before taking him into the park last night, it might have been a very different outcome.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3765
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:34am
Yeah, I like SOMMS's response best.
#3766
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:35am
And as Deet says about me, I would've "gone all Polish on her little ass".
I hung out with Cheyenne Jackson in his dressing room waayyyyyy before he tickled D2. "unleash the girly"
Our fingerprints don't fade from the lives we touch.
Puppies are babies in fur coats.
Tinfoil...The Terrorizing Terminator
#3767
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:37am
I considered calling 911, but
1: didn't want to have to stay in the area, which I know from experience they would have asked me to do.
2: was so enraged I truly didn't care about the welfare of the child. There, I said it.
1: didn't want to have to stay in the area, which I know from experience they would have asked me to do.
2: was so enraged I truly didn't care about the welfare of the child. There, I said it.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3768
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:43am
And I have to say one thing...I don't blame the kids anymore...I blame the parents. These "new age" parents need to get a reality check!
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
#3769
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:43am
Well, yeah, that's true. Once again, stupid parents produce destructive idiots that the rest of us have to deal with,
#3770
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:46am
That's another thing that's so disturbing about it; if her reaction was to hit, I can only imagine where and how she learned that behavior.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3771
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:48am
So sorry Deet! Glad to hear Max is OK. Yes free range children are a blight.
"All I ask of you is one thing: please don't be cynical. I hate cynicism -- it's my least favorite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen."
Conan O'Brien
#3772
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:53am
"Free range children". That may be the best phrase I've heard this week.
#3773
Posted: 7/3/12 at 8:56am
Fried, with mashed potatoes and gravy, peas, and strawberry shortcake for dessert.
Cheyenne Jackson tickled me. AFTER ordering SoMMS a drink but NOT tickling him, and hanging out with Girly in his dressing room (where he DIDN'T tickle her) but BEFORE we got married. To others. And then he tweeted Boobs. He also tweeted he's good friends with some chick on "The Voice" who just happens to be good friends with Tink's ex. And I'm still married. Oh, and this just in: "Pettiness, spite, malice ....Such ugly emotions... So sad." - After Eight, talking about MEEEEEEEE!!! I'm so honored! :-)
#3774
Posted: 7/3/12 at 9:12am
... and in a related story out of San Francisco ...
http://blog.sfgate.com/crime/2012/07/02/woman-82-hurt-protecting-gg-park-goose/
http://blog.sfgate.com/crime/2012/07/02/woman-82-hurt-protecting-gg-park-goose/
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