I finally saw "Burlesque" and I have questions

Yes, I know it's been out for ages but I passed on seeing it in the theater and on DVD or HBO or Showtime. Last might it made it's basic cable premiere on ABC Family so I watched. And I have questions:

ABC Family? I assume it's the Manson or Addams Family?

Alan Cumming?

What the hell kind of club was that?

In what year was Cher replaced by an animatronic figure?

How much did Cher owe the bank and how much did she sell the "Air Rights" for?

Stanley Tucci makes all things passable.

I've heard him talk about working on the film and how much he enjoyed it, but never heard him mention his stuff being cut. Maybe he just wanted to meet Cher. I mean, he IS gay.

Actually, Jordon, the animatronic figure appeared just before FAITHFUL. If you notice, in the "love scene", her lips don't even budge when she kisses Chaz Palminteri. (On a related note: When one Googles "Chaz" to see how to spell his last name, Bono is the one you get first.)

Cher tried everything she could to get out of Burlesque. She added demands. She asked for more money. She asked for a crazy work schedule. No matter what she did, they complied. She could not get out of the contract.

Could her solo have felt more out of place? It was weird.

Oh, and I assume the club was much like the one in Flashdance. The kind that doesn't really exist anywhere.

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He's a Scot. Of course he is uncut.

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Updated On: 1/2/13 at 12:45 PM

Honestly, in what way was what they did different from a modern burlesque show? I haven't seen many, but they mostly dance around lip sync while trying to look sexy, don't they? They don't strip.

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I just watched that for at least three minutes.

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Are there modern Burlesque shows any more? I've seen strip clubs where girls (or boys) strip to per-recorded music and Chicago has had "Burlesque nights" that featured the occasional stripped wedged into a variety show type entertainment. I don't know of any club that presented what I saw in Burlesque- which was mostly lip sync dance routines in semi-revealing clothes- all of which seemed to have huge set and costume budgets.

And why did they have that live band if everyone lip-syncs?

Do the bartenders look like Cam Gigandet?

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JG2,

I tried to do all 10 minutes. I just couldn't make it...but it becomes amazingly zen after a while.

I know a couple of burlesque gals here in NYC...but I don't think I've encountered anything as 'produced' as what's in the movie. But would we say that Pussycat Dolls are what they're going for? I don't know because I won't let the Pussycat Dolls in.

Burlesque acts are really gaining popularity, or at least they were a few years ago. My brother was very into event production for fundraising and such and people were always requesting burlesque acts to perform between bands and speakers. It's more for an adult crowd, but not so adult that it's considered too risque. I think this sort of production would be the dream. The reality is not as sharp.

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Follow This You Bitches

ABC Family is not as wholesome you may think. They air stuff like The Secret Life of the American Teenager, which is about teen pregnancy, and Greek about a fraternity that includes casual sex and underage drinking. These programs have gotten criticism for being too racy and not family friendly.

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Updated On: 1/2/13 at 03:47 PM