It was a dance party--I was sweating profusely. I didn't want to be wearing nice clothes...
Matthew sent me the sweetest text message this morning. It was something along the lines of, "Hey baby, I miss having sex with you...let's get it on tonight."
And I was like--what the eff?
And then he sent me another text that said, "Woops! Wrong person. You're not dollypop!"
"If it walks like a Parks, if it wobbles like a Parks, then it's definitely fat and nobody loves it." --MA