Missouri man arrested at hospital for refusing to leave gay partner

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 1:39pm

This is just WONG, on so many levels.

"A gay man was arrested at a hospital in Missouri this week when he refused to leave the bedside of his partner, and now a restraining order is preventing him from any type of visitation.

Roger Gorley told WDAF that even though he has power of attorney to handle his partner’s affairs, a family member asked him to leave when he visited Research Medical Center in Kansas City on Tuesday.

Gorley said he refused to leave his partner Allen’s bedside, and that’s when security put him in handcuffs and escorted him from the building"


Feel free to let them know how you feel

Research Medical Center
2316 E Meyer Blvd.
Kansas City, MO 64132
[phone]
Ethics Compliance Officer: Liz Tremain
Facility Privacy Official: Liz Tremain
Media Relations: Denise Charpentier [phone]
Human Resources: [phone]
Full Story with Video

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 1:44pm

Unsurprising.

[tazber]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 1:52pm

He has a POA. Time for him to lawyer up and get some $$ from this hospital. And hopefully get Nurse Ratchet fired.

Teach them a lesson.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 2:00pm

That's what is so wrong about this. The nurse couldn't even be bothered to verify that fact.

Sounds like another nurse who is letting her personal views interfere with her job.

Fire the sow!

[madbrian]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 3:07pm

Just to clarify, not all POAs cover medical care. Note: it doesn't change the morality of the circumstances, but if the POA doesn't explicitly cover medical decisions, the hospital staff was in a difficult situation.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 3:15pm

Since Missouri has an amendment banning gay unions, they were probably pretty screwed anyway.

[tazber]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 4:18pm

Even excepting the POA issue, there is still this:

In a 2010 memorandum, President Barack Obama ordered hospitals that receive Medicare or Medicaid funding to allow visitation rights for gay and lesbian partners.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 4:22pm

But they did have a legal civil union, I think.

I mentioned this on Facebook and I STILL have no basis for the argument except abundant cynicism, but isn't it possible that there's more to the story? If they asked him to leave because the relative requested it, they are 100% wrong. Bottom line. What if, however, him refusing to leave his husband's side was escalating the situation? He was admitted to the psychiatric unit, to which he had been admitted multiple times. It's possible the husband was adding to the problem, depending on the diagnosis. The hospital's statement said that though they can't comment on case specifics, they always put patient care first and when a visitor, regardless of relationship, is distracting from care, they must deal with it. If the wife of a straight man was causing him to be anxious, depressed or full of rage, she would be asked to leave his room.

Again, just a possibility. My cynicism has proved wrong before. Maybe I am just too hopeful things are changing.

Updated On: 4/11/13 at 04:22 PM

[PalJoey]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 4:41pm

The arrested man had a legal power-of-attorney. The hospital was in the wrong, and their PR machine has already attemped to issue a non-apology.

This is shaping up to be a Terry Schiavo-like case for gay marriage, and Roger Gorley maybe be something like our Rosa Parks. It's burning up a bunch of conservative sites, with the articles themselves skewing toward the family (i.e., "Gorley was disruptive"), and half the comments (predictably) against the couple but half of them in favor.

Hospital-visitation rights are the initial crack in any anti-gay-marriage feelings. Everyone has been in the situation of knowing someone on a death bed--or else they fear that. You have to have a very strong animus against gays to deprive a gay spouse of the right to comfort dying beloved.

And this is happening at precisely the moment when even the most dogged haters are questioning their hate.

I feel bed for Roger Gorley, but he may end up a hero.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 4:47pm

I don't really get how this could be a Terry Schiavo-like case. This isn't a man on his death-bed, is it? I read that he's in for psychiatric treatment. Family often can't stay in cases like that. I'm honestly not trying to be argumentative. Maybe there is more to the story than I have read.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 4:53pm

"You have to have a very strong animus against gays to deprive a gay spouse of the right to comfort dying beloved."

^^^^THIS!


It seems to me that he became 'disruptive' when he was asked to leave. I would have been too. That's his spouse. And his family members shouldn't have a say in who stays or goes. That's why they have the POA!

[SeanMartin]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:00pm

Honestly, there's too much of this story we dont know right now. I dont think it can come down to a simple assessment of right and wrong. There's just too much information missing at this point.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:01pm

I just worry about too many people hitching their wagons to a story that turns out to be less than accurate.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:03pm

If the hospital is already trying to apologize, then it's kind of obvious they are in the wrong, and know it.

[SonofRobbieJ]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:05pm

Perhaps this person may end up being a Rosa Parks (although, ya know, Frank Kamney), but I, too, just want to hear a bit more.

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:06pm

On Joe My God it says he was asked to leave because his partner's family asked him to leave.

[SeanMartin]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:11pm

^^ And this makes me think the hospital was in a no-win situation, caught between the husband and the in-laws. And when the husband got upset (for which I do not blame him, I would have as well), the family pushed back and asserted its blood privilege... which means the hospital had no choice but to comply.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:15pm

I just read a blanket statement about putting patient health first. It didn't sound like an apology or admission of guilt. I am sure they have been bombarded with calls about this. There are Change.org petitions demanding an apology. The story has been picked up everywhere, with very little to go on.

The nurse may have been a raging homophobe, but she may have just been doing what the patient needed, without regard to the gender of those involved. It's a big MAY, but without more actual facts, there's no way to know. He never said the hospital asked him to leave. The article just stated that he became disruptive when the family member asked him to go. Because of his reaction, security had to be called. The family member had no right to do that, but if his behavior was interfering with his husband's well-being, that would have been the main problem. Again, this is a psychiatric case and the behavior of those around the patient is critical.

[tazber]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:15pm

I hear you Sean, but hospitals are often in the middle of familial disputes. That's why there are laws to guide them.

They don't have to "win", they just have to respect the legality of a situation and let the family fight it out in court.

Assuming what we've read is true, they made the wrong decision and broke the law.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:18pm

The hospital released another statement:

“Research Medical Center was one of the first hospitals in Kansas City to offer domestic partner benefits, which have been in place since 2005, and we have had a policy specifically acknowledging domestic partners’ visitation rights in place for years.
This was an issue of disruptive and belligerent behavior by the visitor that affected patient care. The hospital’s response followed the same policies that would apply to any individual engaged in this behavior in a patient care setting and was not in any way related to the patient’s or the visitor’s sexual orientation or marital status. This visitor created a barrier for us to care for the patient. Attempts were made to deescalate the situation. Unfortunately, we had no choice but to involve security and the Kansas City MO Police Department.”

They asked ALL visitors to leave his husband's room after the initial incident and Gorley refused to leave, at least according to the hospital.

I just read that he has been given the OK to return to the hospital.

Updated On: 4/11/13 at 05:18 PM

[Phyllis Rogers Stone]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:23pm

Perhaps he was belligerent because his partner's family wanted him to leave the room?

[SeanMartin]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:23pm

But it's trickier than that, Taz. Missouri doesnt recognize civil unions from other states, so as far as the hospital was concerned, he was a devoted friend and not much more. The family, on the other hand, was blood, and that would take legal precedence, even with a POA.

It sucks, but until the US puts on its big boy pants and just deals with the national issue of gay marriage, you're going to see more and more of this kind of bullcrap.

[JerseyGirl2]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:26pm

Missouri has domestic partnerships. Were they not registered in Missouri? And this particular hospital has specific policies for recognizing domestic partnerships.

[tazber]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:28pm

But Sean raises an interesting point.

What should the procedure be if MO didn't recognize partnerships but MO hospitals receive federal funding for Medicare/Medicaid?

Does the state law override the federal?

[SeanMartin]

Posted: 4/11/13 at 5:35pm

Jersey, I havent seen anything about them being registered in MO.