What a super idea, Jose'!!! I'll go and donate a quart of blood and then get to see DRACULA: THE MUSICAL for free! Dosen't get any better than that!
Today turned out to be a LOL day. Of course, when you stay with Uncle Dollypop you HAVE to go to church on Sunday. Ugh! But it wasn't too bad because the priest thinks he's a standup comic and was cracking all sorts of jokes. Like he said Jesus was always making people eat and drink with him so it's proof that Jesus was Italian. LOL! I've seen a few Jesus movies and he NEVER looks Italian. In that last movie--that Mel Gibson thing--he MAY have been Italian but he was so bloody that you couldn't tell what he looked like. Really.
Anyhows, after church we had a nice breakfast at this place right on the dock. It was more than just kewel beans to watch the boats and the fishermen all over the place. Then Uncle DP did something real strange. He alwasy dose strange things. I think its all that non-stop Charol Canning music he listens to. He took me to Home Depot, you know that place where all the lesbians hang out? Yup, he took me there and made me look at all the venetian blinds. This was crazy. He made me touch them and open them and smell them. It was stupid. Then when we got home he made me start off my stupid essay by discribing what it was like to open a box of brand new ventian blinds. I never felt so stupid in my life. Well, yes I did, but that was when my pants split when I was in the school assembly program. What made that so really aweful was that I'd forgotten to put on underpants that day and well, it was not a very nice experience. But this was stupid in a different way, and there are lots of ways you can be stupid. I mean, there I was sitting at this keyboard and discribing how new venetian blinds SMELL. I can only imagine how Owen Thorpe would rag on me if he got his hands on this thing! But my Uncle DP says I'm not writing this stupid thing for Owen Thorpe, were writing it for Mr. Tim timmy, the man I worship and adore. OMG!!!
Now after saying all that, I have to admit that the report looks pretty good. Uncle DP went over it with a fine tooth comb (that's his expression not mine!) and we ran it through spell check and stuff. He even gave me a report cover for it. In all honesty, it looks pretty good. However, well see what Mr. Tim Timmy thinks about it and how he grades it. I just hope he dosen't make any cracks about how smelly venetian blinds are. If he does I'll comment about how smelly HE is after he's had all that coffee in the teacher's room. Coffe mouth isn't the word!
~Caldwell~
"Long live God!" (GODSPELL)
Updated On: 8/8/04 at 08:09 PM