The COOTTs (Getcher booty in hur!) — Page 7

I just had date number 5 with guy number 4.
At this rate, I'm going to be pregnant by Toosdie! WOOT!

Now, don't be ignert, there Bway... no more babies! We've got enough mouths to feed.

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Redneck 101
Learn To Speak Redneck

1. The engine's runnin' but ain't nobody driving = Not overly intelligent.

2. As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party (self-explanatory).

3. Tighter than bark on a tree = Not very generous.

4. Big hat, no cattle = All talk and no action.

5. We've howdied but we ain't shook yet = We've made a brief acquaintance, but not been formally introduced.

6. He thinks the sun come up just to hear him crow = He has a pretty high opinion of himself.

7. She's got tongue enough for ten rows of teeth = That woman can talk.

8. It's so dry the trees are bribin' the dogs = We really could use a little rain around here.

9. Just because a chicken has wings doesn't mean it can fly = Appearances can be deceptive.

10. This ain't my first rodeo = I've been around awhile.

11. He looks like the dog's been keepin' him under the porch = Not the most handsome of men.

12. They ate supper before they said grace = Living in sin.

13. Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope = Stop arguing and do as you're told.

14. As full of wind as a corn-eating horse = prone to boasting.

15. You can put your boots in the oven, but that doesn't make them biscuits = You can say whatever you want about something, but that doesn't change what it is.

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But Addy-Mae, my three done started to qualify for the extra crazy checks so I'll be getting a whole $250 a week if I have one more! It'll be like CHristmastime all year!
And that moonshine distillery business is starting to heat up, which means I need another set of hands when baby 3 is 2. Gotta be strong enough to pull that lever...

I gotsta get pregnant now!
*picks up payphone, makes collect call to baby daddy 2, makes hot date for Boones and fried chicken*

I was going to write something but then I realized how disgusting it was.

So I'll do it anyway.

*grabs one of Addy's pink balls*

Rathy, baby, it's all in the pedigree.
Y'all can strut all you want about being trailer trash...but only one person here truly is!
My Name is Earl scares me for its accuracy of depicting my family tree sometimes.

It's dog food. Also known as what you bitches eat when you run out of food.

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Please. I'm a classy COOTT. I only eat top ramen.

*cough*
Exactly what are you saying 'bout me, Rathnait?

You got that right.
*takes out some Skoal, chews, spits*

I gots a suprize for my fellow rednecks.

ETA: Use the dialectizer on BWW and then come read this thread.
The Dialectizer: Rednecks

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Updated On: 1/8/06 at 01:48 PM

*sings softly* ah's flyin' haaah, defyin' graaavadaaay

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Updated On: 1/8/06 at 01:52 PM