The Date Horror Story Thread — Page 2

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#26

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/14/06 at 11:13pm

"I was tricked into going on a blind date with what turned out to be a 12 year old girl.

Oh, that's what is known as the Barbour defense."

Sueleen.. Can I use that as my new signature?

HUSSY POWER! ------ HUSSY POWER!

Updated On: 8/14/06 at 11:13 PM

#27

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/14/06 at 11:35pm

There was this really cute bartender at a restaurant I went to regularly. He knew I was gay and he tried playing matchmaker with another one of his gay friends. I don't like blind dates, but this bartender was so cute that I thought I'd trust his judgement.

I called Tom (the guy I was being fixed up with) and we talked a few times. The bartender had given me a good build-up and this guy was really eager to meet me.

To make a long story short, when I drove to this guy's place, it was a trailer park and when he came to the door, he was a virtual clone of Boris Yeltsen. We went out to dinner and all Tom talked about was how much he likes to wear women's underwear. I drove him home after dinner and didn't even shale hands with him.

It was a looooong, boring date.

"Long live God!" (GODSPELL)

#28

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/14/06 at 11:46pm

"Then he launches into his medical history. He goes on to list every medication that he has ever taken for his various "conditions" and their various side effects that wreaked havoc on his life including, but not limited to, diarhea(sp?) vomiting and constipation."

You made my night

#29

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:05am

"His picture must have been 30 years old.
He said he was 35 but he was at least 65.
He saw me ran over to me and pinched my breasts."

Corine, I think it's terrible when people use old pictures of themselves and pretend they're current.

But give him a break, at his age he might have some vision issues and thought those breastses of yours were your pinchable chubby cheeks!

Twitter @NamoInExile Instagram none

#30

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:06am

Corine, you need to start taking notes so that you can write your memoires. I suggest you have Calvin edit them for you. "Don't ever waste date hair" is sure to become a classic.

#31

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:07am

I wish someone would pinch my breasts.

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. Ralph Waldo Emerson

#32

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:09am

corine I love it, in my storie I always do that......but I never thought of a latte boy, classic!

It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story... AGATHA CHRISTIE, Life magazine, May 14, 1956

#33

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:09am

boobs, may I?

It is ridiculous to set a detective story in New York City. New York City is itself a detective story... AGATHA CHRISTIE, Life magazine, May 14, 1956

Updated On: 8/15/06 at 10:09 AM

#34

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:12am

Braodwayboobs, I'd pinch your breasts.

"I can't figure out what kind of life this is, comedy or tragedy, I just know it's showbiz. And what if I don't agree with the lines I have to read? They don't pay me enough, the way I see it."

#35

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:13am

I had too many to mention, but one that sticks in my craw right now is meeting someone for coffee at Starbucks...he was so cheap that he brought his own teabag...I don't mean a special blend...I mean Lipton!

My mother always used to say, "The older you get, the better you get, unless you're a banana." - Rose Nyland

#36

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:14am

You mean all I had to do was ask..you guys are the best !!!! The next BWW gathering that you 2 are at..my breasts are yours !!!!

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. Ralph Waldo Emerson

#37

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:20am

So Corine, did the date hair and cootchie wax go to waste? Or did you stay home with Mommy and watch Project Runway?

PEACE.

#38

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:23am

Nina, I would be honored to ghostwrite the Corine Cohen autobiography. If it needs some spicing up, I'll just throw in some of my own stories.

#39

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:26am

well you both date gay men so it's only natural....

XING
PED

#40

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:29am

Oh, Calvin, I am sure CoCo has enough juicy stories to fill volumes without having to resort to using your sordid tales.

PEACE.

#41

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:34am

best. thread. ever.

XING
PED

#42

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:34am

Calvin..just stick to your eating/licking ass peaches.

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. Ralph Waldo Emerson

#43

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:40am

I'm sure there are enough of us here with long enough memories that if we brainstorm, we can recall LOTS of Corine date stories. Calvin could easily whip them into book shape and Corine could finally get the notoriety she enjoys here in the world at large.

I'll go first:

1) Super nice guy. Fatal flaw: hairy back.

Twitter @NamoInExile Instagram none

#44

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:45am

Back in my dating days, I let a friend set me up with a friend of his that was in town to visit. The good news was that he was drop dead gorgeous. The bad news is that he was a raging alcoholic/drug addict. In the car coming home from our night out (during which he consumed two bottles of wine single-handedly...well, less the two glasses I had), he proudly informed me that I could do "whatever I wanted to him tonight". I back-burnered that suggestion. The evening came to a quick close when he asked if I wanted to "party and play". Uh, no...and find your car keys, buddy.

#45

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:56am

do you still have his number, flippancy?

XING
PED

#46

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:57am

2) He was so gorgeous he took my breath away...literally!

PEACE.

#47

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 10:59am

I hate dating.

Been there. Done that.

I'm all about casual flings.

#48

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 11:01am

and what's your number, matthew? ya know, for research.

XING
PED

#49

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 11:02am

Actually, Robbo...I don't think he has a number anymore. I heard two years later (from the same friend that set us up) that he had expired. No surprise here.

#50

re: The Date Horror Story Thread

Posted: 8/15/06 at 11:03am

3) This is the only one I remember
;-)

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