When teasing on the board goes too far- Page 4

[ForTheLoveOfLea]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 9:13pm

There's a difference between telling people what they need to hear and discourtesy. Discourtesy is brutish in spirit and the way CJR defined "bitch" was someone who tells you what you need to hear for your own good as she does here on this board. I hardly consider being outspoken and rude similar. I have yet to see her make a boorish comment to anyone for the sake of a fight. She is one of the finest members here, in my opinion.

Regarding the comment she made about rude comments on the message board, I agree to an extent. I agree that you shouldn't get upset over something someone says who doesn't know you personally, but if it is something that is very sensitive to you (see the remark Dollypop made to Yenta) then I understand. I don't think it is necessary to have rude comments at all on this board, though. They definitely take away from the positive atmosphere we usually have around here. It is because of fights like these people get afraid to join our community.

This thread has turned into everything Yenta was talking about. We are fighting on a thread where we are supposed to realize that what we say can hurt people and make things really unpleasant. Why can't we all just get along?

Edit: I just got GL's last post. I take back anything I posted here that seemed rather mean towards GL.

Updated On: 7/5/05 at 09:13 PM

[ghostlight2]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 9:36pm

No worries, FortheLoveofLea. For what it's worth, I found your post to be strongly-worded, but not mean. It was very well thought out. I'm not fighting, I'm just in a discussion.

[ForTheLoveOfLea]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 9:44pm

Thanks, GL.

[The Grovers Corners Yenta]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 9:45pm

People are really dicussing this . Mission accomplished!

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:10pm

It's interesting this topic because I had something happen to me today that got blown way out of proportion. I posted a message in jest and then it got all misconstrued because another poster took it upon themeselves to try to label me a hypocrite by posting something I wrote in another thread.

Well, that little plan backfired and I called him on it. Needless to say words are said and lines are drawn. Now I don't go out of my way to be mean or rude to anyone but if I'm provoked or pushed then watch out because I won;t think twice to tell you to go f - - - - yourself.

But I'm a sweetheart, really I am.

:: bats eyelashes ::
Updated On: 7/5/05 at 10:10 PM

[Plum]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:13pm

Right, but are you now going to chase the people who offended you around and never, ever stop insulting them? Hopefully not- you had a fight, and that's it.

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:16pm

No I stopped. As a matter of fact I've blocked them because I don't want to argue with anyone.

[Plum]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:18pm

Great. :) It'll probably save a lot of people a lot of stress, and it's one of the differences between being assertive and being an asshole.

[The Grovers Corners Yenta]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:26pm

When I am upset with myself on this board I just block myself.

[CJR]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:27pm

Alright, I'm back.

No, I didnt have the patience to read 3 pages... mostly because the topic caught my eye as I was closing the board and I had 3 antsy kids jumping up and down next to me wanting to know when I was going to take them on the trampoline... but I digress. Patience is a virtue that has apparently escaped me over the years haha

To elaborate, I figured this thread was started as a result of the other thread where Marquise and JRB (and whomever else) were going at it. What I meant to get across was that I *do* find most of the people here (the ones I've met and some I haven't) to be 'what you see is what you get'..... I must say, I've always found Marquise to be a complete sweetheart..... but even the sweetest of people have a breaking point. I've always known him to be very upfront, blunt and honest even if that's NOT what the other person wants to hear. Quite frankly, I admire that.

Thank you to those of you who said I'm a positive contributor to the board -- I really appreciate that. As for calling myself a bitch... well I guess I can be when provoked. Yes, it's self proclaimed and yes I am proud of it. I never have to worry about having someone else defend me or fight my battles, but it IS nice to know that I *do* have people who have my back should the need arise. I guess maybe a better way to describe myself is blunt, upfront and honest. As I said in my last post, I call a spade a spade -- even if that's not what you want. The truth hurts, but the truth will also set you free.

The other point I was trying to get across in my last post was something I've said on this board (and many others) countless times. It's a message board. In the grand scheme of things, it's very miniscule..... people who are going to get bent out of shape about teasing and tongue in cheek remarks probably need to take a step back and re-examine things. These are (for the most part) people you don't know and will probably never meet.... why get yourself all worked up? Not to mention, it almost goes without saying that sarcasm is almost always lost on a message board...

And now I'm babbling, so I'm going to shut up now

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:30pm

And this is exactly why i love you girl!

[nmartin]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:30pm

CJR, your post was almost longer than the thread. (sarcasm, dear, sarcasm) Actually, you made some really good points especially in the last paragraph.

[CJR]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:34pm

Hahaha It was a long post... I didn't realize quite how long it was when I hit 'post'

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:36pm

But you know what's funny about the whole thing? The person who provoked me in that thread went out of their way to do so and in the end said they could not stand me when I don't even recall doing anything to this person in the past. Go figure.

[The Grovers Corners Yenta]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:37pm

CJR.......it was a bit long, but it was very well said.

[Plum]

Posted: 7/5/05 at 10:45pm

*gives Marquise Internet chocolate*

Oh, what the heck. Internet chocolate for all! A mood enhancer even Tom Cruise can't object to.

[etoile]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 12:12am

I'd like to take a moment and direct people to the "Meds" thread. And if some are taking them daily, perhaps some need to speak with their doctor and discuss tweaking their amounts.

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 12:40am

you would know alot about that etoile....

[etoile]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 12:42am

Did I touch a nerve?

[Marquise]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 12:43am

oh no hun don't flatter yourself. you could never do that..

[shameless]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 10:31am

Good Morning All,

I see I missed another debate last night. Just to clarify for those of you who didn't read the whole thread, like my homegirl, CJR, the "license to be assholes" comment was directed at the people who are obnoxious at every opportunity and who rarely have anything positive to contribute about anything.

I know there are a lot of great people here, even though I haven't met any of them in person.

[The Grovers Corners Yenta]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 12:30pm

After doing some soul searching on this topic, I have come to the conclusion that I had a right to feel hurt. I own those feelings and no one can take them away from me or critcize me for having them. When those hurtful remarks and actions came from someone who I like, who I have known for a long time and who I care about............it hurts even more deeply. I really don't think those cruel remarks were intentional but were perhaps a sign of some unhealthy behavior or unresolved issues. I just pray that everyone who is in such emotional turmoil that they hurt others can get the help they need.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 12:42pm

All of this Yenta, even after you wrote all those things in the BWW Novel thread (which has been deleated).....?

[The Grovers Corners Yenta]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 1:00pm

Matt, I know what he is like. A caring and decent person. I just pray for him to find peace.

[Mister Matt]

Posted: 7/6/05 at 1:03pm

That is a side of him we have never seen.