Britney on Broadway... — Page 6
#127
Posted: 11/18/05 at 6:42pm
Britney is a Grammy winning artist. Does that mean she's a fabulous singer? No. And really, for Christina, that Emmy doesn't validate a whole lot either.
Question: Will Esparza win for The Homecoming?
BobbyBubby: I hope so. If only for the mental health of many people on this board.
#128
Posted: 11/18/05 at 6:44pm
You know... they could have a LOT of fun with this. They could rework the whole show to work for Britney and K Fed.
For example... "I'm a Brass Band." The ensemble outfits would have to be changed to match the new 'mood.' Britney's had sexy schoolgirls and sexy flight attendants in her videos, I'm sure we can find a place for some sexy marching band geeks! And I'm positive no one will mind seeing scissors taken to those costumes. *shudder*
This also provides an excellent oppurtunity to throw away that choreography and start from scratch - because what they've got now does not provide Britney with nearly enough oppurtunities to touch her boobs. To make up for this, the new choreography for 'There's Gotta Be Something Better than This' is going to be solely Britney's signature 'boob-rotation' move. There ain't NOTHING better than that!
Oh, and Oscar? Psssh. Neurotic accountant no more! Let's try neurotic rap star. Those not interested in seeing Britney on stage will certainly fork over $100 to see Denis O'Hare in a doo rag. Worrrrd up.
There will also be many oppurtunities to incoporate some old Britney classics into this - let's face it - rather trite and boring score. Audiences will get a lift when Britney performs 'I'm A Slave 4 U' to the character of Leonardo DiCaprio (yeah... it was felt that theatregoers just couldn't "connect" to Vittorio Vidal.) Of course Britney will perform the heartwrenching 'Not a Girl (Not Yet a Woman)' during a scene at the Fandango ballroom where she questions herself, her life, and her breasts. And 'Oops! I Did It Again' will replace the 'I'm the Bravest Individual' scene, and will be sung after Charity farts in the elevator.
IT'S BRILLIANT!
(Disclaimer: EVERYTHING in the above was COMPLETE AND UTTER SARCASM - in case you didn't notice. I do NOT want Britney to come to Broadway. Thank you for your time.)
For example... "I'm a Brass Band." The ensemble outfits would have to be changed to match the new 'mood.' Britney's had sexy schoolgirls and sexy flight attendants in her videos, I'm sure we can find a place for some sexy marching band geeks! And I'm positive no one will mind seeing scissors taken to those costumes. *shudder*
This also provides an excellent oppurtunity to throw away that choreography and start from scratch - because what they've got now does not provide Britney with nearly enough oppurtunities to touch her boobs. To make up for this, the new choreography for 'There's Gotta Be Something Better than This' is going to be solely Britney's signature 'boob-rotation' move. There ain't NOTHING better than that!
Oh, and Oscar? Psssh. Neurotic accountant no more! Let's try neurotic rap star. Those not interested in seeing Britney on stage will certainly fork over $100 to see Denis O'Hare in a doo rag. Worrrrd up.
There will also be many oppurtunities to incoporate some old Britney classics into this - let's face it - rather trite and boring score. Audiences will get a lift when Britney performs 'I'm A Slave 4 U' to the character of Leonardo DiCaprio (yeah... it was felt that theatregoers just couldn't "connect" to Vittorio Vidal.) Of course Britney will perform the heartwrenching 'Not a Girl (Not Yet a Woman)' during a scene at the Fandango ballroom where she questions herself, her life, and her breasts. And 'Oops! I Did It Again' will replace the 'I'm the Bravest Individual' scene, and will be sung after Charity farts in the elevator.
IT'S BRILLIANT!
(Disclaimer: EVERYTHING in the above was COMPLETE AND UTTER SARCASM - in case you didn't notice. I do NOT want Britney to come to Broadway. Thank you for your time.)
#129
Posted: 11/18/05 at 6:46pm
EVERY single review of Charity all recognized that Christina is a great actress and really did a great job with the acting. But this isn't a Britney vs Christina thread.
Point blank, Britney is WAY too young. The amazing, unbeatable, and legendary Gwen Verdon was in her 40's when she created this role.
If you know about the show. Charity is a character that has been around the block.
Point blank, Britney is WAY too young. The amazing, unbeatable, and legendary Gwen Verdon was in her 40's when she created this role.
If you know about the show. Charity is a character that has been around the block.
#130
Posted: 11/18/05 at 6:52pm
*throws in a subliminal "karen ziemba"*
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#131
Posted: 11/18/05 at 6:58pm
I have more issue with her classless husband being in the chorus than her being in the show.
#132
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:00pm
Now Bobby, who said everyone on Broadway is classy?? Broadway has got its share of coke addicts too!!! :)
Question: Will Esparza win for The Homecoming?
BobbyBubby: I hope so. If only for the mental health of many people on this board.
#133
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:01pm
Bobby, maybe she's interested just for that reason - so that K-Fed actually has his own income!
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#135
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:02pm
I think people should wait to pass judgements until it actually happens. If it happens, maybe Britney would surprise everyone and be really good... I know a lot of people are probably trying to figure out ways to throw things at me through their computers for saying that, but oh well. I mean, Britney started off-Broadway, then did Mickey Mouse Club. Just because her albums have lackluster songs that are WAY overproduced doesn't mean she couldn't shock the hell out of people and actually be decent.
#136
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:03pm
I think the bigger issue is that she's completely wrong, and too young for the part.
#137
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:04pm
I think K-Fed is classless enough to play the whoreshop owner. (Oh, Geez, I forget the character's name!!)
Question: Will Esparza win for The Homecoming?
BobbyBubby: I hope so. If only for the mental health of many people on this board.
#138
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:04pm
by the way...what grammy award did Britney win?
"People have their opinions and that doesn't mean that their opinions are wrong or right. I just take it with a grain of salt because opinions are like as*holes, everyone has one".
-Felicia Finley-
#139
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:04pm
by the way...what grammy award did Britney win?
"People have their opinions and that doesn't mean that their opinions are wrong or right. I just take it with a grain of salt because opinions are like as*holes, everyone has one".
-Felicia Finley-
#140
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:05pm
Best Dance Song for "Toxic." All machine, baby.
Question: Will Esparza win for The Homecoming?
BobbyBubby: I hope so. If only for the mental health of many people on this board.
#141
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:05pm
That is one great song, though.
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#142
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:06pm
No matter what anyone thinks of Britney, EVERYONE loves some Toxic!!!
Question: Will Esparza win for The Homecoming?
BobbyBubby: I hope so. If only for the mental health of many people on this board.
#143
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:07pm
They need to find a way to fit it into CHARITY.
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#145
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:15pm
damn it, why did you have to get her pregnant, BEn?!
if they needed a 'star' to replace Christina, jennifer garner would have been perfect!
if they needed a 'star' to replace Christina, jennifer garner would have been perfect!
"Beating AIDS and extreme, stupid poverty, this is our moon shot. This is our civil rights struggle, our anti-apartheid movement. This is what the history books will remember our generation for--or blame us for, if we fail."-Bono
#146
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:18pm
She's way too young too.
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#148
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:28pm
If they can pay for Brit, they can pay for Sarah Jessica Parker.
Now she deserves this role!
Now she deserves this role!
#149
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:31pm
Parker can't sing either.
Have I ever shown you my Shattered Dreams box? It's in my Disappointment Closet. - Marge Simpson
#150
Posted: 11/18/05 at 7:36pm
Is this a joke? Even if it is, this is something I would definitely see.
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