Sit down, shut up and clap: A guide to theater etiquette by Amanda Duarte- Page 3

[kdogg36]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 8:57am

I've gently confronted a couple of people using their cell phones, and the results have always been positive.

However, the people I really want to confront - and who have collectively been by far the most disruptive to my theater experiences - are latecomers. When one of them expects me to stand up while they block my view in the middle of a performance, I just want to glare at them and tell them to go back in the direction they came from. I know that would only extend the disruption, so I end up just glaring.

I know this has been a controversial topic here, with people listing all sorts of excuses for this kind of rudeness. But I've been on time for hundreds of performances, and never late once. I know it could well come to pass that I arrive late for a performance at some point, but I'm quite sure that if that happens, I would rather miss the show (or the first act) rather than be so rude as to interfere with the enjoyment of those who arrived on time.

Updated On: 6/29/18 at 08:57 AM

[ArtMan]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:17am

What I have noticed lately is people's refusal to stand up and let me through, either before the performance or at intermission.  With space between the seats already limited and my being 6'3 and muscular it is quite difficult at times to get by when the person just sits.  It happens just as often with women or men, young or old, gay or straight.  At a performance recently, at intermission, two guys just sat there and there was no space and I couldn't get past them.  I finally stated "are you going to let me by?".  They still just sat.  So I stepped all over them with my size 13 feet.  I did not care for a second if i harmed them in any way.

[Lot666]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:20am

EllieRose2 said: "Can people in America really NOT go a few hours without food or water? Unless you have a medical condition, you can. I am actually telling you, the human body can handle it. Really and Truly."

[Lot666]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:26am

WhizzerMarvin said: "Her 25/30 age limit is stupid though; Yes, taking a 6 year old to Three Tall Women is probably a bad idea, and if the child were to be disruptive, I would feel bad telling the parents to shush him or her, but there’s no reason an 18 year old shouldn’t see show."

I took a 10 year old girl to the recent Broadway revival of The Crucible. I thought it an odd interest for someone her age, but she very much wanted to go with me and her parents gave their consent. We sat in the front center orchestra area and she was as quiet as a mouse throughout the entire show. In fact, the only time she even moved was when the live wolf/dog crossed the stage near the end of the first act (she clutched my arm). Afterwards, she proclaimed it the best play she'd ever seen (and she's seen quite a few).

[Lot666]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:33am

kdogg36 said: "I've been on time for hundreds of performances, and never late once. I know it could well come to pass that I arrive late for a performance at some point, but I'm quite sure that if that happens, I would rather miss the show (or the first act) rather than being so rude as to interfere with the enjoyment of those who arrived on time."

Same here. I know the unexpected can happen at any time (e.g., transportation delays, slow service at a pre-dinner meal, etc.), but I believe most tardiness occurs because a lot of people are simply inconsiderate of others and behave like the world revolves around them ( "It took me a while to get dressed, so they'll just have to hold the curtain for me!" ).

Updated On: 6/29/18 at 09:33 AM

[poisonivy2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:36am

Wow a lot of white privilege in this thread.

[ArtMan]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:42am

poisonivy2 said: "Wow a lot of white privilege in this thread."

Support your argument, because I don't see that.

[poisonivy2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:45am

Only white people can get away with physically assaulting others in a theatre and bragging about it on a message board and not getting arrested.

[DAME]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:52am

Who is white?

[ArtMan]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:53am

I hope your comment was not directed towards me, because no physical assault took place.  If a person chooses to be so inconsiderate and will not let a person pass, then they suffer the consequences of my butt or crotch in their face or my feet stepping on them.  BTW, your "only white people" comment is just as eye rolling as "only white people are racist"  comments that I have read on Broadwayworld for years.

[DAME]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 9:57am

ArtMan said: "I hope your comment was not directed towards me, because no physical assault took place. If a person chooses to be so inconsiderate and will not let a person pass, then they sufferthe consequences of my butt or crotch in their face or my feet stepping on them. BTW, your "only white people" comment is just as eye rolling as "only white people are racist" comments that I have read on Broadwayworld for years."

We are in total agreement.

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:00am

poisonivy2, I smacked the shoulder of a man in front of me who was passing a noisy bag of bagel chips between himself and his mother during Les Miz. I'm not white (and I got away with it)! Thanks, Imperial, for your inattentive ushers!

[poisonivy2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:11am

I'm talking about Amanda Duarte.

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:13am

Thanks for clarifying! Now...I'm not a fan of hyperbole either, but you know how to detect it in writing, right?

[poisonivy2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:17am

LizzieCurry said: "Thanks for clarifying! Now...I'm not a fan of hyperbole either, but you know how to detect it in writing, right?"

Yes I do. I don't think Duarte was kidding though, and I don't think the people in this thread saying they'd rip the tongues out of someone chewing gum were kidding either. It's definitely a mindset in a subset of theater-goers that theater-goers should only be wealthy and white. Some of these "guidelines" are common sense but others are purely a white man's idea of etiquette. For instance, "no one under 25"? 

[LarryD2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:22am

I'm a middle-aged, nonwhite gay man who's been going to the theater since I was a kid and working in theater (and related industries) for more than 25 years. Lately I've seen people argue that expecting any standard of behavior from people is exclusionary, classist, etc. It's crazy. There was a time in the not-so-recent past where people didn't have to be told not to take a phone call in their seat during the show, or loudly chow down on crisps, or put their damn feet on the stage. Nowadays, a Broadway audience resembles the wild west more often than not.

Theaters are complicit in promoting bad behavior. As recently as a decade ago, theaters wouldn't allow you to take nearly any drinks to your seat, much less food. Now you can practically get a pizza delivered to your seat, because concession mark-ups are fabulously high and theater owners/producers want that dough.

Obviously, Duarte's article contains a fair amount of hyperbole, but her overall point is clear and worth getting behind.

Updated On: 6/29/18 at 10:22 AM

[DAME]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:24am

poisonivy2 said: "LizzieCurry said: "Thanks for clarifying! Now...I'm not a fan of hyperbole either, but you know how to detect it in writing, right?"

Yes I do. I don't think Duarte was kidding though, and I don't think the people in this thread saying they'd rip the tongues out of someone chewing gum were kidding either. It's definitely a mindset in a subset of theater-goers that theater-goers should only be wealthy and white. Some of these "guidelines" are common sense but others are purely a white man's idea of etiquette. For instance, "no one under 25"?"

Oh you are right.  I am not kidding.  I might think of a classier way to get you to stop smacking your gum or put your phone away. .  But I won’t just st there and let you ruin the show for me. And I am not wealthy and white. You should just be polite and know how to behave in a theater.  Because if not you never know when the stranger next to you will get all ghetto on you.

[SmokeyLady]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:33am

poisonivy2 said: "Wow a lot of white privilege in this thread."

I find you to be racist and not very bright. 

[Lot666]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:39am

poisonivy2 said: "I don't think the people in this thread saying they'd rip the tongues out of someone chewing gum were kidding either."

Wow. So you can actually envision a Broadway theatre patron inserting their hand into another's mouth and detaching their tongue?

poisonivy2 said: "Some of these "guidelines" are common sense but others are purely a white man's idea of etiquette. For instance, "no one under 25"?"

What does being 25 years old (or younger) have to do with being white?

[Miles2Go2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:48am

[poisonivy2]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:50am

Lot666 said: 
poisonivy2 said: "Some of these "guidelines" are common sense but others are purely a white man's idea of etiquette. For instance, "no one under 25"?"

What does being 25 years old (or younger) have to do with being white?"

"My 13 year old has her au pair while me and my husband enjoy a night in the theater."

 

[LizzieCurry]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:50am

Have you tried contacting Amanda Duarte or are you just hoping she sees this thread?

[Kad]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:51am

poisonivy2 said: "LizzieCurry said: "Thanks for clarifying! Now...I'm not a fan of hyperbole either, but you know how to detect it in writing, right?"

Yes I do. I don't think Duarte was kidding though, and I don't think the people in this thread saying they'd rip the tongues out of someone chewing gum were kidding either. It's definitely a mindset in a subset of theater-goers that theater-goers should only be wealthy and white. Some of these "guidelines" are common sense but others are purely a white man's idea of etiquette. For instance, "no one under 25"?"

...she is absolutely kidding. This is a comedic rant piece.

[dramamama611]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:52am

Oh, this thread. 

[Lot666]

Posted: 6/29/18 at 10:58am

poisonivy2 said: "Lot666 said:
poisonivy2 said: "Some of these "guidelines" are common sense but others are purely a white man's idea of etiquette. For instance, "no one under 25"?"

What does being 25 years old (or younger) have to do with being white?"

"My 13 year old has her au pair while me and my husband enjoy a night in the theater.""

I don't see how the quoted scenario supports your claim. You seem to be implying that only white people could possibly afford to pay for childcare; that sounds awfully racist to me.