My (actual) thoughts on CRY-BABY (long)

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:03pm

CRY-BABY is, without asterisks or qualifications, the worst musical I've ever seen. And I've seen a lot of bad musicals. This show makes PIRATE QUEEN look like a hall of famer. This show makes GOOD VIBRATIONS (which is now #2 on my list of bad musicals) look like Shakespeare. Hell, it makes Kathleen Marshall's pathetic production of GREASE look good.

And you can't even blame it on the fact that it's the 4th preview. They had a six (or so) month run at the La Jolla Playhouse. A run that got relatively good notices, no less! This is not DEUCE, which opened cold in New York with two elderly ladies (at the top of thier game) having trouble following the hearing test of the tennis balls bouncing. This is a show that had all the time in the world.

And they still have a month or so of previews, but, unfortunately, you can't do a complete overhaul of a $10 million (I'm guessing) musical in a month, from writing to casting to design.

It's more-or-less the same story as ALL SHOOK UP...bad-to-the-bone guy shakes things up in the square town, tries woo the square girl of his dreams, goes to jail trying, and ends up integrating the cools and squares. But ALL SHOOK UP had a lot going for it - fun direction, dynamic leads, and a memorable score. CRY-BABY has none of those.

James Snyder and Elizabeth Stanley. Dance: 10. Personality/Charisma: 0. They sing fine. Neither have charisma and they don't have chemistry. He's too good to be bad, she reads WAY too old.

Harriet Harris is too underused for her usual scenery chewing to get in the way, and she sounds like a cat getting skinned when she sings, but, God bless her, she's the most dynamic one on stage.

Alli Mauzey, "You Gotta Get A Gimmick." A lot of fun in a role that would get applause no matter who played it. Her big number, "Screw Loose," is the one song in the show which truly captures the 'John Waters' persona.

Christopher Hanke is truly defined as a square. Chester Gregory looks bored stiff. The trio of women are mostly entertaining.

David Javerbaum and Adam Schlesinger's score is derivative of traditional 50s beat, which is the exact same mold as Grease. But Grease had a memorable score. Not a memorable song in this lot, though Rob Ashford's always strong choreography saves two of the numbers - "Girl, Can I Kiss You...?" and the ensuing sex scene, as well as "A Little Upset," the dynamic number which uses license plates as taps.

I frankly expected more from Mark O'Donnell and Thomas Meehan, whose book for HAIRSPRAY was so strong and witty, and followed the 'John Waters' theme so well. I give them credit - they were sitting in the last row taking notes (though it seems like Meehan is shaking like there's no tomorrow), but, unfortunately, all the time in the world can't make this thing funny. There was 1 gag I liked, which nobody else got - Judge Igneous Stone.

It's hard to believe Mark Brokaw is the guy who directed stuff like How I Learned to Drive and As Bees in Honey Drown. Though I saw from his bio that this is his first real musical (if you don't count MARTY with John C. Reilly), so I'll just blame it on the fact that you can't always get it right the first time.

And people leapt to their feet. Not even to flee like I did. They leapt to give the cast a standing ovation. Mediocrity sells, I guess, but this isn't even mediocrity.

Though I can't help but wonder what Megan Hilty would do with the lead role... Updated On: 3/19/08 at 06:03 PM

[B3TA07]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:05pm

Whatever, guys don't listen to him he's just following the bandwagon he can't appreciate how good a show is when it hasn't even opened jsut think it will be even BETTER when it opens!! omgee i'm gonna make a yankeefan voodoo doll..brb

[jaystarr]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:08pm

Youre comparison are soo funny! and THANK YOU for a great review as always!


Thank you for saving me $54.00 and an 8 hour bus trip to NYC! I really appreciate it. Now I can go to the gym and listen to YOU CAN'T BEAT THE SYSTEM!

J*
Updated On: 3/19/08 at 06:08 PM

[WiCkEDrOcKS]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:10pm

Ouch.

I'm happy I only paid the $50 for the preview tickets...

I am REALLY shocked at the negative reaction this show is getting.

And I, like many others, despised every second of GOOD VIBRATIONS so this should be interesting...

[Midnight Radio]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:11pm

I just saw the matinee and coming from someone who was so excited and hopeful for this production, I 100% agree with you. This is absolutely the worst show I have ever seen, and it hurts even more because it had so much potential and a great cast (minus a few). I will be writing a full review later, but I am off to go hit up Xanadu and get this awful taste out of my mouth...

Also, let me just say, this is not a bandwagon issue. This show is truthfully awful.
Updated On: 3/19/08 at 06:11 PM

[WiCkEDrOcKS]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:14pm

So, yankeefan, the audience liked it?
Were they laughing and enjoying it throughout and genuinely enjoying it? And what was the crowd like? Tourists?

I thought I was so smart buying tickets for this before it opened because I was expecting it to be the next HAIRSPRAY...guess not. Hah.

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:19pm

Well, the entire mezzanine was papered, for one thing (if I had known it would show up on the papering sites, I would have waited to buy the tickets).

The orchestra ate the show up like Catnip. I ran the hell out of their quicker than the Flash, so I can't say if the entire place stood up, but as I was getting my coat on, I saw a solid 1/2 of the orchestra on their feet.

The applause after each song was polite at best, but there was more laughing than silence. A lot of jokes fell flat - mainly the intellectual ones.

[WiCkEDrOcKS]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:21pm

Haha...sounds like a blast.

[DottieD'Luscia]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:22pm

Was Carly Jibson in? Was Harriett's 2nd act number orchestrated yet?

[Midnight Radio]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:26pm

I think the entire show can be best summed up by the expression on the face of the depressed pie-girl during the finale...

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:26pm

Carly was out, Harriet's number was not orchestrated.

[Not Barker, Todd.]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:45pm

I really liked the demo. It's a pity the show isn't up to snuff.

[frogs_fan85]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:53pm

I really might just have to see this now.

EDIT- Dracula holds a dear place in my heart, maybe this show can join it. Updated On: 3/19/08 at 06:53 PM

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 6:59pm

Oh, I honestly loved Dracula.

[frogs_fan85]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 7:07pm

Me too. How can you go wrong with a show that has a gigantic baby/man sculpture thing in a cemetery and features nudity from not only Kelli O' Hara, but Melissa Errico? And flying?

[B3TA07]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 7:27pm

I never saw Dracula, but people always mention the nudity. Was it at least tastefully done? :-/

[popular_elphie]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 7:35pm

Sorry you didn't like it. I definitely get the similarities to ALL SHOOK UP; I've called this show ALL SHOOK UP 2.0. I felt like it was a better ASU.

[musikman]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 7:39pm

.....But otherwise, you clearly loved the show!!











(Please note extreme sarcasm)

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 8:10pm

How could you tell DRACULA was a 100% heterosexual production? Unnecessary (yet moderately tasteful) female nudity. This wasn't SPRING AWAKENING nudity. This was Kathleen Turner in THE GRADUATE nudity...only Kelli O'Hara is significantly better looking than Kathleen Turner.

O'Hara did the full monty, God bless her. It was dim, so from the balcony, you couldn't see a thing. But from the orchestra, you could see ever detail of her body.

Errico took her top off as she was having sex with Drac.

[jaystarr]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 8:23pm

WBaF is seeing the show right now..so most likely well get his review late tonight..can't wait!

J*

[JRybka]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 8:27pm

well scratch that off my list of show to see.
guess it is down to only:
Sunday in the Park
Gypsy
Mamma Mia
or something like that....

[WestonBoy]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 8:49pm

I've been eagerly anticipating this show for months. Saw the first preview and snuck out during the bows with disgust and sadness at how awfully it was done.

[B3TA07]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 8:51pm

Oh dammit.

[EugLoven]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 9:07pm

I was at the Wednesday matinee with Andy (WBaF). I will keep my opinions to a minimum, as I'm not a fan of mud-slinging on the boards.

Attendance: I was front-row mezzanine, which was only 1/4 full... 1/3 of which left at intermission.

Dancing: Good, specifically "I'm Upset." Ashford will likely be the only Tony nomination for the entire production.

Lyrics: Witty, if you're listening.

Credit where it's due: Congratulations to a very young, hard-working and spritely cast, many of which are making their Bway debuts.
Updated On: 3/19/08 at 09:07 PM

[Yankeefan007]

Posted: 3/19/08 at 9:10pm

I saw you. You stared directly at me from one of the mezzanine boxes. (For the record, I recognized you by your Avatar, which isn't there anymore.)

And I don't consider what I'm doing to be "mud-slinging." I paid full price, stupidly, and have every right to share my thoughts on the show. There's no malice in any inch of the post. Updated On: 3/19/08 at 09:10 PM