self entitlement/rude behaviour- Page 2

[PitPro2004]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 12:42pm

"Well, you'll have to take a Time Machine to a different era, because we live in a world of entitlement thanks to bad parenting for over a decade now. Give everyone everything they want, let them do whatever they want, coddle those children, never let them scrape their knees, never tell them they're bad, never punish them, and this is what you get."

Truer words...

Welcome to the 2000's. Whatever happened to class is right.

[After Eight]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 1:10pm

I too have noticed an increase in texting and playing games on one's i-phones during performances. (Though in some cases i-phone pinball was probably more engaging than what transpired on stage.) This mostly from younger theatregoers. But I've also seen an increase in talking during performances, and this from people of all ages.

What's interesting is the way people have tried to deal with them, and in turn, their reactions. I think one has to ask very, very politely, almost apologetically, to get the desired result. Otherwise, the offending party can get very defensive at being chastised, and you end up with a big mess. I saw this happen recently. A man turned around and said rather sharply at the people behind him to stop talking. (All parties in their thirties). They glared at him with anger. At intermission they went at it again with everyone's temper rising. At another play, I saw two men almost come to blows over the same issue.

Perhaps theatres could place inserts in every program listing all the rules of theatre etiquette. It would also be good information for outside the theatre as well.

[ShbrtAlley44]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 1:15pm

Welcome to my life as an usher. You wouldn't believe some of the things people do. I had a man yell at me when I told him he would have to wait for late seating. Literally yell at me and threaten to just walk down the aisle. Why wouldn't I want to seat you? There are rules! People get so childish when they don't get their way.

[Kad]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 1:16pm

When I saw The Normal Heart, two women next to my friend and I apparently witnessed someone on their phone during the first act (we didn't). And then they spent the duration of the next scene discussing how rude that was amongst themselves, unaware of the hypocrisy of the situation.

[Eris0303]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 1:20pm

I once turned around to ask people to stop talking during a show. We had a friend in the show and when he came out for his curtain call we stood, clapped, and immediately sat back down. The next thing I know someone is tugging on the back of my shirt. I turn around and one of the women said "we can't see if you stand up". So in their world standing during curtain calls is a much bigger offense than talking through the show. I also know that had I not asked them to stop they wouldn't have felt the need to say anything to me.

Updated On: 5/18/11 at 01:20 PM

[After Eight]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 2:01pm

Interesting tale, Eris. One definitely has to factor in bruised egos when dealing with this.

[jasonf]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 2:40pm

As much as this sucks, we can't blame it all on the younger generation and place the blame on all of them 9or theiboysr parents) there are actually a lot of really well-behaved kids and theater-goers. Too bad a couple of bad people ruin it for everyone.

We were at a local performance of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels and there were two middle-school aged who were playing games on their phones before the show started. Two minutes before the show was supposed to start, the dad said "Guys, phones off" and they just said okay and did it. They were enjoying the show and well extremely well-behaved the entire show. We were all really impressed.

It all depends on the parents and there are some good ones still out there

[bk]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 2:44pm

I just think you've got the percentages wrong - there are well-behaved kids and wonderful parents - they are in the minority, not the majority.

[bwayphreak234]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 2:52pm

When I was at August: Osage County there was a woman in front of me checking football scores on her extremely bright blackberry about every 5 minutes. When someone finally asked her to stop, the woman was appalled and shocked that anyone would even consider asking her to stop.

[ShbrtAlley44]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 3:33pm

I have more of a problem with patrons age 50 and up, honestly. They are usually the rudest. They also often don't know how to turn their phones off.

[broadwaydanwi]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 3:43pm

Wait a minute! During the last year or so, I was extremely annoyed by older patrons inside a theatre setting. First was the older man who tapped his foot on a seat during the second act of an opera I was enjoying. I looked at his foot and then I looked at his face. He never got my message. Second was the ancient woman who freaked when her cell phone went off during the performance of a small musical. She did not know what to do, and her old friend told her to leave the theatre. She tried talking on the phone while heading up the aisle, and she almost tripped on another person's foot. At the same theatre during another show, a nervous biddy kept inserting and removing her playbill from one of those plastic grocery bags. The noise was annoying to everyone in the theatre, yet she never stopped. I have since stopped going to this theatre. I often think of writing management a letter about extremely rude patrons. Instead, I found another place to spend my money!

[Eris0303]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 3:52pm

I have never had an issue with a child in the theatre. Every time something has happened it's been because of the adults. Yes, I was once kicked in the face by a girl at Little Mermaid. But I don't blame her for that. She was too young to be there.

[bk]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 4:32pm

I think you know very well we are not talking about small children here - we are talking about entitled, selfish, self-absorbed tweens and teens, whose parents have given them the "right" to feel entitled that they can do whatever they please. The small children will, of course, in many cases, grow up to be exactly the same.

[Eris0303]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 4:42pm

Even the tweens are less of a problem than the older people.

[eatlasagna]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 5:25pm

oh and i want to add that during August: Osage County... when the character's cell phone went off during the dinner table scene i really thought someone's phone went off in the audience and i got pissed!!! haha

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 5:35pm

It's people who think they aren't doing anything wrong that pisses me off

[AC126748]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 6:33pm

In some ways, theatres (producers?) have legitimized certain behaviors by allowing patrons to bring food and drinks to their seats, etc. Nothing irritates me more than when the guy sitting next to me swirls the ice cubes in his $18 Jameson throughout an entire act and feels entitled to do so because he bought the stupid souvenir cup. Movie theatre mentality has taken over Broadway.

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 6:44pm

I'm with Shbrt and others- I've had more problems with older audience members than teens. Especially since so many of the older audience members see theatre all the time and should know better! I can't stand being at shows where every.single.joke is followed by the inevitable dialogue:

Husband: What did he say?
Wife: *repeats punch line*

I think suffering through a subscriber couple's hearing loss denial is far more willfully disrespectful to the audience around them than a bored kid with a cell phone.

Updated On: 5/18/11 at 06:44 PM

[AC126748]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 7:05pm

^ I'm pretty sure Roundabout's shows are paced with those kinds of interactions in mind.

[After Eight]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 7:15pm

"I think suffering through a subscriber couple's hearing loss denial is far more willfully disrespectful to the audience around them than a bored kid with a cell phone."

That is annoying, it's true. But it's not always a result of hearing loss denial. It can be a result of the actors not projecting their voices properly, or the director not positioning his actors so they could be heard.


This happened at the first preview of That Championship Season, where all around me people were complaining at intermission about not being able to hear the actors. And they were right.

And also, sometimes the measures taken by people wholly cognizant of their hearing problems can create problems themselves. I remember seeing Mary, Mary, in which a person's hearing device emitted static noise throughout the play. And yet, for all that, the play was still wonderful and remains one of my most treasured theatregoing memories.

[TheatreDiva90016]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 7:15pm

Oh man, the last show I saw at the Taper, I had that couple sitting next to me for BURN THIS.

"What did they just say."
"Something about 'fcuk'."
"Did you just say fcuk?"
"I was just repeating what the actor was saying."
"The actor told you to do what?"

I moved at intermission...

[orangeskittles]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 7:20pm

^ I'm pretty sure Roundabout's shows are paced with those kinds of interactions in mind.

They should really just invest in a screen above the proscenium that displays the joke. It would be less distracting.

After Eight, when the only people who seem to have a problem are the elderly couples who loudly speak up, it's not the actors' fault. I've never heard that exchange from anyone under the age of 50.

Updated On: 5/18/11 at 07:20 PM

[bk]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 7:36pm

I think we're talking about two types of rude behavior here - I understand hearing problems and yakking, but neither of those is as irritating to me as someone with a brightly-lit Blackberry or iPhone texting away - and I think you will find that in most cases it's youngsters doing that. Believe me, adults are just as annoying, just in other ways. And yes, I, too, blame theaters that think they're putting on a boxing match or circus event and selling all that crap and allowing it in the theater - at Baby, It's You they have people selling food in the AISLE.

[eatlasagna]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 9:31pm

question... so if a show is completely sold out and SRO... and you want to move because of annoying patrons next to you... are you just SOL?? or do theatres always keep maybe one or two seats free in a theater for random incidents that occur (besides like a loud patron, maybe a broken seat or someone in front of you is way too tall)... just wondering

[JillianSch]

Posted: 5/18/11 at 11:34pm

At Anything Goes last week a 50yr oldish woman behind me was singing along to e v e r y song. Seriously.