Pinocchio Live Action Movie Musical 2022

[Seb28]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 7:54am

Has anyone else seen this?

I just watched this movie and it is terrible. Just terrible.

The whole message of the original story is that beautiful opening "When you wish upon a star" and that with perseverance, character and hard work your dreams can come true. Well, that's all removed. During the 4 second Disney studio's opening Jiminy Cricket comes hanging in and says 1 line and the film starts. No more beautiful song, no more atmosphere.

Then we see all of Gepetto's clocks, just like the original, but this time all of the clocks contain other Disney classics (Sleeping beauty, etc) and everything has turned politically correct. We see the clock where a mom slaps her naughty child on the ass, just like the original, but this time a police officer is added, who points a finger at the mother.

Then the blue fairy comes in. Extremely bad acting and singing. This is supposed to be a dream-like figure, like a mesmerizing sort of conscience. Cynthia Erivo looked like a sassy hairdresser that came straight out of hell. One hand in her side. Saying her lines with her eyes rolling, in a manner as if she was gossiping at the local hairdressers. Because every theme in the film has changed and is now supposed to be politically correct, she held a very confusing monologue that basically takes away all enthusiasm to even watch any further. She tells Jiminy Cricket to be Pinocchio's conscience to learn about right from wrong, only that is not necessary anymore, because she decides to make Pinocchio very clever and all-knowing from the start. So basically his role can disappear and has no point anymore. Pinocchio does not lie anymore either, because he is already more clever and sincere than anyone else, he only lies to manipulate, for example to deliberately grow his nose in a scene to let Jiminy cricket walk on his nose to enter the cage, ad then says, haha I got you, I lied deliberately to grow my nose so I could save Jiminy. So it's some kind of strange lesson in how to manipulate. Very weird. After a lot more of this drivel, she flies away with very bad CGI and "sings" the most terrible reprise of "When you wish upon a star" that you have ever heard. Dry, flat, forced, damaged, she slides up towards all her notes but then does not reach the actual note. I mean, she actually does not reach it. Her casting and "singing" just completely failed. I feel that basically every other actress would have been better in this role.

The rest of the film is jarring, Pinocchio knowing things happening in advance because he is so clever, and at the end of course he is NOT turning into a real boy, because that would not be politically correct, to change your body for others, or whatever drivel was behind it. What on earth is happening.

Updated On: 9/11/22 at 07:54 AM

[Dark_Vader]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 11:34am

I saw this as well. It is unwatchable. It is by far one of the worst of Disney's animated-to-live reinterpretations. 

One of the worst films of 2022. 

[BrodyFosse123]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 11:51am

I recently watched Walt Disney’s original 1940 animated masterpiece and loved the endless adult themes and totally understand why it’s one that is rarely shown - many sequences shown to get the film’s message across just would not fly in today’s safe PC bubble. That’s why I love the animated films done while Walt was still alive. He geared them to adults but had content to entertain the younger audiences. When looking back at those films today, it’s impossible to not be startled with their heavy psychological overtones.  Wonder how “safe” this HOCUS POCUS 2 sequel will be as the original was quite heavy with its storytelling and some visuals.  

[willep]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 12:07pm

Honestly the trailer was enough to dissuade me from watching it.

[ErmengardeStopSniveling]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 2:05pm

I think I liked it better than most people, but I still think it's a bad movie.

My biggest takeaway is that Keegan-Michael Key needs to do a musical STAT! His performance as Honest John was a real highlight. The problem is I don't think he would mean much at the box office.

[MsPiety&Rectitude]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 5:00pm

Seb28 said: "After a lot more of this drivel, she flies away with very bad CGI and "sings" the most terrible reprise of "When you wish upon a star" that you have ever heard. Dry, flat, forced, damaged, she slides up towards all her notes but then does not reach the actual note. I mean, she actually does not reach it. Her casting and "singing" just completely failed. I feel that basically every other actress would have been better in this role."

While I don't necessary relate the changes in this movie to a drive to be PC, I completely agree that the movie loses all the charm of the original and that a lot of very strange and confusing choices were made here. Also LOL at your description of Cynthia's WYWUAS, I completely agree... I'm a big fan of Cynthia's voice and have listened to her Color Purple recording many many times, but this did not sound good and I don't understand why. It's also her only appearance in the whole film.

One thing that hasn't been mentioned here is that, for a "live-action" remake of this animated classic, MOST of the movie is animated (and not convincingly)! Why not a real puppet for Pinocchio? Why not a real cat for Figaro? Why no practical effects at all? It's basically Tom Hanks in front of a green screen for two hours. 

 

[jpbran]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 8:04pm

My biggest takeaway is that Keegan-Michael Key needs to do a musical STAT! His performance as Honest John was a real highlight. The problem is I don't think he would mean much at the box office."

He’s in the musical movies/shows Schmigadoon, Jingle Jangle and The Prom. Or did you mean a stage musical?

[ErmengardeStopSniveling]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 10:02pm

Yes, I meant a stage musical. I'm aware of his film musical work!

 

[darquegk]

Posted: 9/11/22 at 10:28pm

Just listened to his song: all I can think is, he’d be an exemplary Harold Hill in the current version of 
Music Man.

[bryan2]

Posted: 9/12/22 at 10:06am

I absolutely hated this. The political correctness ending was shoved in your face. Tom Hanks ACTING was horrible. And being someone who loved Cynthia in The Color Purple, She sounded and acted horribly. When i saw her in TCP i thought her laid back dull interpretation was a choice to make Celie more pathetic, but everytime i have seen her since she is dull and boring and never seems interested in what she is singing. WIcked the movie is doomed (plus I feel she looks way to old to be a teen in the early parts of wicked) Just a bad bad Pinocchio 

 

[mememe]

Posted: 9/12/22 at 4:00pm

bryan2 said: "I absolutely hated this. The political correctness ending was shoved in your face. Tom Hanks ACTING was horrible. And being someone who loved Cynthia in The Color Purple, She sounded and acted horribly. When i saw her in TCP i thought her laid back dull interpretation was a choice to make Celie more pathetic, but everytime i have seen her since she is dull and boring and never seems interested in what she is singing. WIcked the movie is doomed (plus I feel she looks way to old to be a teen in the early parts of wicked) Just a bad bad Pinocchio

"

She’s not a gifted actress. Even when concert singing there is no energy in her body when she performs 

[Seb28]

Posted: 9/12/22 at 8:29pm

bryan2 said: "When i saw her in TCP i thought her laid back dull interpretation was a choice to make Celie more pathetic, but everytime i have seen her since she is dull and boring and never seems interested in what she is singing. "

This is a very accurate description, she does not seem interested in what she is singing or acting. 

 

Updated On: 9/12/22 at 08:29 PM

[Sutton Ross]

Posted: 9/12/22 at 8:35pm

This was the hottest of garbage. Woof. 

[Matt Rogers]

Posted: 9/12/22 at 8:39pm

It was horrible - they cut good songs to add bad songs, and the ending is absolutely unforgivable. 

[BwayLB]

Posted: 9/12/22 at 8:53pm

I watched last night. The star power visuals and story were not enough to justify it's existence. I expected more creative effort. The pacing was slow in the beginning than it was rushed in pieces. The dialogue was too over the top.

[Matt Rogers]

Posted: 9/14/22 at 9:13pm

Seb28 said: "Has anyone else seen this?

I just watched this movie and it is terrible. Just terrible.

The whole message of the original story is that beautiful opening "When you wish upon a star" and that with perseverance, character and hard work your dreams can come true.Well, that's all removed. During the 4 second Disney studio's opening Jiminy Cricket comes hanging in and says 1 line and the film starts. No more beautiful song, no more atmosphere.

Then we see all of Gepetto's clocks, just like the original, but this time all of the clocks contain other Disney classics (Sleeping beauty, etc) and everything has turned politically correct. We see the clock where a mom slaps her naughty child on the ass, just like the original, but this time a police officer is added, who points a finger at the mother.

Then the blue fairy comes in. Extremely bad acting and singing. This is supposed to be a dream-like figure, like a mesmerizing sort of conscience. Cynthia Erivo looked like a sassy hairdresser that came straight out of hell. One hand in her side. Saying her lines with her eyes rolling, in a manner as if she was gossiping at the local hairdressers. Because every theme in the film has changed and is now supposed to be politically correct, she held a very confusing monologue that basically takes away all enthusiasm to even watch any further. She tells Jiminy Cricket to be Pinocchio's conscience to learn about right from wrong, only that is not necessary anymore, because she decides to make Pinocchio very clever and all-knowing from the start. So basically his role can disappear and has no point anymore. Pinocchio does not lie anymore either, because he is already more clever and sincere than anyone else, he only lies to manipulate, for example to deliberately grow his nose in a scene to let Jiminy cricket walk on his nose to enter the cage, ad then says, haha I got you, I lied deliberately to grow my nose so I could save Jiminy. So it's some kind of strange lesson in how to manipulate. Very weird. After a lot more of this drivel, she flies away with very bad CGI and "sings" the most terrible reprise of "When you wish upon a star" that you have ever heard. Dry, flat, forced, damaged, she slides up towards all her notes but then does not reach the actual note. I mean, she actually does not reach it. Her casting and "singing" just completely failed. I feel that basically every other actress would have been better in this role.

The rest of the film is jarring, Pinocchio knowing things happening in advance because he is so clever, and at the end of course he is NOT turning into a real boy, because that would not be politically correct, to change your body for others, or whatever drivel was behind it. What on earth is happening."

Yes this movie is horrible but your description of his nose growing is not accurate. Also, Cynthia Erivo is the one saving grace in this thing. Unfortunately, she is in one scene and then is never heard from again. And the ending is unforgivable. However, maybe you could have put a spoiler alert to those who have not yet seen it. Also, no one has yet mentioned a ridiculous sounding Lorraine Bracco voicing a seagull. 

Updated On: 9/14/22 at 09:13 PM

[mememe]

Posted: 9/14/22 at 9:44pm

Matt Rogers said: "Seb28 said: "Has anyone else seen this?

I just watched this movie and it is terrible. Just terrible.

The whole message of the original story is that beautiful opening "When you wish upon a star" and that with perseverance, character and hard work your dreams can come true.Well, that's all removed. During the 4 second Disney studio's opening Jiminy Cricket comes hanging in and says 1 line and the film starts. No more beautiful song, no more atmosphere.

Then we see all of Gepetto's clocks, just like the original, but this time all of the clocks contain other Disney classics (Sleeping beauty, etc) and everything has turned politically correct. We see the clock where a mom slaps her naughty child on the ass, just like the original, but this time a police officer is added, who points a finger at the mother.

Then the blue fairy comes in. Extremely bad acting and singing. This is supposed to be a dream-like figure, like a mesmerizing sort of conscience. Cynthia Erivo looked like a sassy hairdresser that came straight out of hell. One hand in her side. Saying her lines with her eyes rolling, in a manner as if she was gossiping at the local hairdressers. Because every theme in the film has changed and is now supposed to be politically correct, she held a very confusing monologue that basically takes away all enthusiasm to even watch any further. She tells Jiminy Cricket to be Pinocchio's conscience to learn about right from wrong, only that is not necessary anymore, because she decides to make Pinocchio very clever and all-knowing from the start. So basically his role can disappear and has no point anymore. Pinocchio does not lie anymore either, because he is already more clever and sincere than anyone else, he only lies to manipulate, for example to deliberately grow his nose in a scene to let Jiminy cricket walk on his nose to enter the cage, ad then says, haha I got you, I lied deliberately to grow my nose so I could save Jiminy. So it's some kind of strange lesson in how to manipulate. Very weird. After a lot more of this drivel, she flies away with very bad CGI and "sings" the most terrible reprise of "When you wish upon a star" that you have ever heard. Dry, flat, forced, damaged, she slides up towards all her notes but then does not reach the actual note. I mean, she actually does not reach it. Her casting and "singing" just completely failed. I feel that basically every other actress would have been better in this role.

The rest of the film is jarring, Pinocchio knowing things happening in advance because he is so clever, and at the end of course he is NOT turning into a real boy, because that would not be politically correct, to change your body for others, or whatever drivel was behind it. What on earth is happening."

Yes this movie is horrible but your description of his nose growing is not accurate. Also, Cynthia Erivo is the one saving grace in this thing. Unfortunately, she is in one scene and then is never heard from again. And the ending is unforgivable. However, maybe you could have put a spoiler alert to those who have not yet seen it. Also, no one has yet mentioned a ridiculous sounding Lorraine Bracco voicing a seagull."

The movie is indeed dire but he does turn into a real boy, at the end. It just happens very subtly as he walks away from the camera. You see his legs and arms changed into flesh, and get a slight glimpse of the side of his face